JonjMie Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 Hard today, starting to sink in shes moving on and more than likely found someone else, thoughts in my head how exciting it will be for her, someone else doing the things we did, late night texts and good mornings. Exciting meetings, her cheeky laugh and smile, will they be going round for the night etc etc I sit wondering if she uses the same text smilies and kisses she used for me in her own unique way which she probably does. Beating myself up over it and the urge to drive past again which I havent for a while has come back. Someone talk me through it please. 1
FancyFace Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 I feel your pain OP, I really do. It seems to me that you are getting out of the denial stage and now fighting the acceptance of what exactly is going on. You just have to push through. I am 57 days NC (woop woop!!!) but it was excruciating in the beginning. At times I would hyperventilate and just felt like I was dying, I had real pain in my chest and I was sure it was my heart slowly breaking. I had to fight myself constantly to not stalk his social media or drive past his house and it honestly was an absolute battle. But each battle that I won, I felt better and better about myself. I slipped once and checked his Instagram, and I just wanted the good Lord to take me right there and then! A word to the wise, know that any information about her right now will just set you back, always remember that when the urge to stalk/check up on her arises. I say all this to put across the point that it is normal to feel the way you are feeling. Its as if a tornado has just ripped through your living room but trust and believe it will get better. Its totally normal to think about her and what she is doing, and more importantly who she is doing it with. There are only two ways to go through this, either sit and wallow through the pain or try focus on other things. The more you focus on her, the more life you breathe into your pain. DVD's, gym, meeting friends, throw yourself into work, post her on LS. Well done for having gone NC and lasted as long as you have. Some people cant even make it two days but you have made it 15. Just envision how much better you will be in the next 15. Stay strong and know that it will get better and you will heal and come out on the other side harder, better, faster, stronger.
bigtrouble Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 (edited) Hard today, starting to sink in shes moving on and more than likely found someone else, thoughts in my head how exciting it will be for her, someone else doing the things we did, late night texts and good mornings. Exciting meetings, her cheeky laugh and smile, will they be going round for the night etc etc I sit wondering if she uses the same text smilies and kisses she used for me in her own unique way which she probably does. Beating myself up over it and the urge to drive past again which I havent for a while has come back. Someone talk me through it please. Be strong, don't give in it won't help in any way... You won't feel better nor will it help get her back... Its pointless and useless... Find your anchor and focus on it... ######################################## I can surely relate to this, I know its difficult to think what once you shared is no longer between you. I would indulge myself in thoughts that her new Relationship would fail, I know its kind of dumb but works for me. Well honestly each time I miss her, I just keep forcing myself scenarios where here relationship would fail and she falls into deep regret. I am on my 12day NC maybe in time I will get over this too. Edited January 21, 2015 by bigtrouble
SycamoreCircle Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 You have two choices: -NC -Break NC. Start NC all over again.
unforgotten Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 Continue NC and soon enough you'll hate the days when the NC will break unintentionally. I've bumped into my ex yesterday. We were in the same room for about half of hour. I barely said a word to her but the very presence of her being there messed up with my head again just a little bit. But the longer the NC the better it gets. I remember the days I was in your shoes desperately wanting to keep a contact, check on her, "unintentionally" bump into her. Now I desperately want to avoid it and don't want to have any information about her life at all. She's slowly losing her power over me. You'll get there. If you're going through hell, keep going! 1
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