darkmoon Posted January 17, 2015 Posted January 17, 2015 anger is one way of showing disapproval, but it is a red flag too, now and again ok, but ... the same furious high and mighty person will grovel or hold their tongue when dealing with a bigger built guy who could hit them.... or with their boss who could fire them anger is controllable and a device with which to bully - any thoughts?
StalwartMind Posted January 18, 2015 Posted January 18, 2015 It is indeed controllable, yet many struggle with it. Most likely they use it as a way to quickly vent, and while that may temporarily release your anger, it still does not solve most problems. If you ever fell the need to shout angry words or reach borderline physical aggressiveness, then you are actually just being weak. The wiser person will know when to move away if an agreement, understanding, etc. can not be reached with someone else. On the bit humorous side of things, it's rather amazing how "childlike" so many adults can be, especially those that consider their opinion to be of the only "valid" one. Negative emotions running wild are nothing but a destructive force that none of us should ever have in our life, yet most of us do every single day on different levels.
Gloria25 Posted January 18, 2015 Posted January 18, 2015 (edited) I think it takes a bigger person to walk away, to not lash out with their anger. It's also just being smart/rational. So what if you could probably kick your boss' butt sideways? Is it worth losing your job? And yeah, you gotta pick your battles. You think I'm gonna take on someone who's twice my size? That's stupid. The only thing I don't like about me holding in the anger is that it festers and I eventually blow up (but still not to the extreme of hitting someone, just a lot of yelling - like a dog with a worst bark than bite). The other thing I don't like is internalizing it and doing things like picking my skin. But, from what I understand a lot of women are like that. We'll punish ourselves instead of having a backbone and standing up to people...we sorta wanna "keep the peace". Trust me, I've been in situations where people tried to push me to fight them. I'm glad to this day that I stood my ground and ignored them. On one occasion, I went home and cried cuz I wanted to kick the chick's butt soooo bad, but I knew she was trying to set me up. Yea, I actually felt "violated" cuz she hit (well physically "pushed/shoved" me) me and I just stood there and took it...but again, while angry, I knew I was being set up. Edited January 18, 2015 by Gloria25 1
2.50 a gallon Posted January 18, 2015 Posted January 18, 2015 I can tell none of you grew up in a bad neighborhood like I did. There was no turning the cheek. Turning your cheek was seen as a weakness and the word would spread and you would be constantly having for turn your cheek again. By that I mean nothing you owned or had would be safe. They would walk up to you and hit you in the mouth and take your wallet. Calling the cops would only make it worse. In fact I know of people who did call the cops and were later found murdered.
Jesuischarlie Posted January 18, 2015 Posted January 18, 2015 Poor you.... I have heard stuff like that. It does make me appreciate my upbringing and we were poor.
2.50 a gallon Posted January 18, 2015 Posted January 18, 2015 We were not poor, more middle class, both parents worked, when we moved to the big city they bought a year old house in a new development. New houses were still going up all around us. But at the same time there were just a few small islands of land that had been developed two decades earlier, and it was from this poorer sections that spread into our neighbor hood. Forty years later, there is no way I would drive thru that area at night. It is all gangs. Thirty years ago a 16 year old girl, making great grades in high school, had a great future ahead of her, was shot and killed by a gang member simply so that he could tattoo and tear drop below his eye to show he had killed somebody.
2.50 a gallon Posted January 18, 2015 Posted January 18, 2015 In my teenage years, I learned how to channel my anger, locked it away deep in my emotional side. I learned how to use it as a tool when things got really bad. A light sip of it would give me unbelievable energy. Inside I would turn cold and calculating. I thought I had it totally under control until at age 35, I caught my bride of 6 months kissing a guard where she worked. The genie was out of the bottle. I was totally out of control. Had there not been a chain link fence topped with razor wire between us I would have been at them with a ball bat. It scared me so bad, that I swore off ever falling in love again. It would be another 14 years before I fell in love again.
Recommended Posts