Jesuischarlie Posted January 17, 2015 Posted January 17, 2015 I have been working with a man who is lovely and kind but there is no way I am ever going to want him to be my boyfriend. How do you tell a guy this and keep the friendship...and working relationship in tact. I really need to keep the job... There's only us two. Guys ?
todreaminblue Posted January 17, 2015 Posted January 17, 2015 how has he let you know he is interested in more than friendship? If he has told you specifically you could say I like you as a friend but I dont want it to go further than that....... theres someone for you waiting out there..... and i will be one friend to congratulate you when you find her.....deb
compulsivedancer Posted January 17, 2015 Posted January 17, 2015 You could tell him that you don't want to mix work and play. 3
darkmoon Posted January 17, 2015 Posted January 17, 2015 (edited) say you already have a boyf, look be tactful, you do not want to hurt his feelings - or foster resentment - he might not be attractive to anybody and if he gets spiteful and vengeful you will have a harder time than this Edited January 17, 2015 by darkmoon 2
littleblackheart Posted January 17, 2015 Posted January 17, 2015 I would say (and have said) exactly what I am thinking, which went along like this: hey Bob, I think you're a lovely guy and I hope this won't affect our working relationship, but I'm not interested in taking things further, now or any other time. I'm sorry if it hurt your feelings and will understand if you want to keep your distance for a while'. I won't lie, it didn't go down too well and a fair few frosty months followed in the staff room. I don't enjoy hurting people's feelings but ultimately I'd rather loose a friendship or have a few uncomfortable moments at work than encourage someone just because he's nice. Tell him straight, if he's as nice as you say, he'll understand. He'll come around eventually so long as you keep in professional and don't change how you are around him. 1
preraph Posted January 17, 2015 Posted January 17, 2015 ^ Like she says. What not to do is say it's only because you work together. I told a boss this once and next thing I knew he left the company and came knocking. You an always say he's just not your type, too. You can also begin now fixing him up with women you think might like him and take his mind completely off you!!! 2
Author Jesuischarlie Posted January 18, 2015 Author Posted January 18, 2015 ^ Like she says. What not to do is say it's only because you work together. I told a boss this once and next thing I knew he left the company and came knocking. You an always say he's just not your type, too. You can also begin now fixing him up with women you think might like him and take his mind completely off you!!! Hey that's a good idea. I could say I have a friend who is his type. Then that would stop him thinking I'm interested 1
Author Jesuischarlie Posted January 31, 2015 Author Posted January 31, 2015 Typical I show I'm not interested by telling him I'm not ready and guess what.... The work dries up.... So I wouldn't sleep with him just to keep working with him... Some men...yuck.
elaine567 Posted January 31, 2015 Posted January 31, 2015 Typical I show I'm not interested by telling him I'm not ready and guess what.... The work dries up.... So I wouldn't sleep with him just to keep working with him... Some men...yuck. Not so "lovely and kind" then. 1
preraph Posted January 31, 2015 Posted January 31, 2015 By all means, become his pimp. They can't hate you for that.
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