applej4 Posted January 15, 2015 Posted January 15, 2015 Long-time friends had me over for dinner recently. Their son (late 30s), who I’ve known since he was in jr high school, was also there. I’ll call him Rick. He lives in another city, but was in town for job-related reasons. He was telling us about a blind date he had the other night that went sour. Rick said he’d been emailing and talking on the phone to a woman who he connected with via an online dating site a month or two ago. They exchanged quite a bit of information, also pictures. They made a date to meet in person (for the first time) at a nice fancy hotel for dinner. For whatever reason, there was a mix-up in communication about where they were supposed to meet. Rick said he had told her to meet him at the entrance to the restaurant. He waited, and waited, and checked the lobby, called her cell and left a msg, and after about 45 minutes he saw her standing there. They shook hands, and Rick says although he found her attractive, she was ticked off and made no effort to hide it. “I’ve been standing here for almost an hour, you said meet you in the bar, and the bar is closed.” Rick says he was taken aback, told her she was supposed to meet him at the entrance to the restaurant, and that he had left her a message. She said her phone petered out, and that she was about to leave when she saw him. So…..they sat down, and he suddenly remembered she was right………...he had told her to meet at the bar. Rick apologized. Waitress came and Rick’s date was terse as she ordered a drink. Rick said to waitress “Don’t be offended, she’s mad at ME.” (awkward)After a few minutes of chitchat, his cell phone rang and he stepped away to take an important business call. When he returned to the table, his date asked if he had been trying to arrange a backup date. Rick said he was so uncomfortable that he just wanted the night to end, so when waitress came to take dinner order he said he asked for the check (for the drinks). Date dropped her jaw. Rick said he stood up and said “It was nice meeting you” handed her her coat and walked her to the door. Apparently she recharged her phone battery because she called him twice late that night (he didn’t pick up)………tearful messages asking “what went wrong?” and "Will I see you again?" (DUH) then another long message berating him and asking “Who the (eff) do you think you are?!” ……..yikes…….Rick said he’s done and has no intention of rehashing the evening with her or seeing her again. Well, I have my own opinion. Forty-five minutes is a long time to wait for someone to show up, especially for a first date. She probably thought she'd been stood up, but she should have made sure her phone was charged.Based on what Rick said, he was turned off at her reaction to the initial mix-up, but also the question about a “backup” date, and the way his date had been rude to an innocent waitress/server. Then……..those tearful messages. The initial mix-up was Rick’s fault, but he did apologize. The woman continued to pout.Obviously it wasn’t meant to be, but I think Rick dodged a bullet. What say you?
LostOnes05 Posted January 15, 2015 Posted January 15, 2015 I'd say Rick was definitely wrong with the mix up in the beginning. However, he was also wrong for answering the phone when he was on a date. I'm a guy but if a date did that to me after being late, I'd leave. It was a bit disrespectful of her time as well. Unless he let her know that he might have to answer a business call beforehand, it is disrespectful. He should have been the one calling her to apologize, not the other way around. It kills me with women. All because he didn't want to be bothered, she felt some way about it. She probably cried to a friend after the initial two messages and they told her to tell him off. That's just my opinion...now back to this tea. 2
Assada Posted January 15, 2015 Posted January 15, 2015 yeah, Rick told her that he doesnt tolerate certain things. He knows what he is worth, and he knows what his time is worth and he didnt compromise them. If she had a better attitude, it would have went just fine, even if she was late, but her attitude wasnt the sort of thing that he was attracted to. - Rick is a high quality guy that doesnt bother with low-quality stuff
6Pack Posted January 15, 2015 Posted January 15, 2015 I think they both handled the entire scenario poorly. 1
Author applej4 Posted January 15, 2015 Author Posted January 15, 2015 I agree neither one handled things well.But the woman sounded like she’s had other dates go wrong (for whatever reasons). Maybe not always her fault. The emotional phone messages later sounded like probably many things are not going well for her.But I also think she should have made sure her phone was charged before leaving home, waited about 15-20 minutes, then called him. Rick was responsible for the mixup about where to meet/connect. The remark to waitress was uncalled for but he was taken aback. Her remark about a "backup date" was kind of a jab.
preraph Posted January 15, 2015 Posted January 15, 2015 He blew it and her being disorganized and not having her phone charged up, she had a part in that. She could have had him paged if she'd wanted to, even. Then she handled it all badly and, well, he found out what she'd be like when mad at him on the very first date and didn't like it -- so probably just as well to know now than 5 months from now.
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