Mary Oak Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 So, this isn't really a dating question as we have not be on a date. Quick run down, met this girl at a party last year very briefly. Saw her again last weekend, and approached her and chatted for just a few minutes as my ride was leaving. Got her number and told her I was going to call and ask her out. She said great. So I text the next day saying it was nice seeing her again etc. We texted for a bit. The day after that I texted her and asked if she was busy this weekend. She said she had her kids this weekend and a friend was coming in. She mentioned that maybe Sunday or next week sometime we could "meet up". That was good. But, it is more difficult with lesbians I think to know if we are meeting as friends or more. Also, I can't tell if she really wants to do anything or not. Guess my question is, how can I make sure this is a date?
Hopes Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 how can I make sure this is a date? lawls, I find it funny that even girls need this clarification. say these magic words: "Will you go on a date with me?" 1
Gaeta Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 You have not seen her for an entire year. I think it might be a good idea to 'meet up' as friends first and catch up. Then after you get a feeling of that meeting if you are still interested then come forward with a real date invitation. 1
Author Mary Oak Posted January 14, 2015 Author Posted January 14, 2015 The thing is I want this to be a date. I don't want to fall into just friends quickly. I want a chance. I don't know how to proactively let her know I am interested without being overwhelming. Like how often should I text her? What do I say? Should I just wait to see if she texts me? (though she doesn't seem like the type to do that). SHe is very attractive, so I know dates are not hard to come by for her.
Redhead14 Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 So, this isn't really a dating question as we have not be on a date. Quick run down, met this girl at a party last year very briefly. Saw her again last weekend, and approached her and chatted for just a few minutes as my ride was leaving. Got her number and told her I was going to call and ask her out. She said great. So I text the next day saying it was nice seeing her again etc. We texted for a bit. The day after that I texted her and asked if she was busy this weekend. She said she had her kids this weekend and a friend was coming in. She mentioned that maybe Sunday or next week sometime we could "meet up". That was good. But, it is more difficult with lesbians I think to know if we are meeting as friends or more. Also, I can't tell if she really wants to do anything or not. Guess my question is, how can I make sure this is a date? It doesn't matter at this point whether it's a date or not. All you would really be doing is meeting each other and at that point deciding whether or not you want to go on an "official" date. You may find that you don't want it to be a "date" because you're not interested in her that way. Just go out and look forward to enjoying the time 1
Gaeta Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 The thing is I want this to be a date. I don't want to fall into just friends quickly. I want a chance. I don't know how to proactively let her know I am interested without being overwhelming. Like how often should I text her? What do I say? Should I just wait to see if she texts me? (though she doesn't seem like the type to do that). SHe is very attractive, so I know dates are not hard to come by for her. She is not going to friendzone you just because that first meeting isn't officially a 'date'. It's not because you label that first meeting a 'date' that she will reciprocate your feelings. She is going to feel that vibe for you or she won't (it being a date or not). That is out of your hands. So you go meet her, have fun, and then ask her out on a real date for the following week. That is 1 week of your time invested. No one is wasting time. If you absolutely want this first meeting to be an official date, when you have not seen her in an entire year, without first touching base with her, to me that would be overwhelming. I know you feel this urgency to show your romantic interest in her but don't worry, she won't be married by next week. Even if she is being hit on frequently, it means nothing. 1
Author Mary Oak Posted January 14, 2015 Author Posted January 14, 2015 So, is it out of line to text her often? I don't want to get to know her over text. Done that before and didn't like it. SO, I just want to have quick texts and be friendly/flirty. But also don't want to appear needy or overwhelming. When I say often, I mean every day or couple of days. Not all day... just a quick text here and there. SInce I probably won't be seeing her for a week or so.
Gaeta Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 So, is it out of line to text her often? I don't want to get to know her over text. Done that before and didn't like it. SO, I just want to have quick texts and be friendly/flirty. But also don't want to appear needy or overwhelming. When I say often, I mean every day or couple of days. Not all day... just a quick text here and there. SInce I probably won't be seeing her for a week or so. This one you play by ears. You start by texting her once and see how she reciprocates. If she is enthusiastic and chatty then good, you can text her again a couple of days later. She may initiate texting as well. If you contact her and you feel she is short then don't insist and wait to see how your 'get together' goes.
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