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She has unblocked me on FB

unforgotten

By unforgotten
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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unforgotten Established Member

unforgotten

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Immediately after the BU she'd block me on the FB and I blocked her too. I'm about 40 days NC, this means no text, no phone calls etc. and she hasn't contacted me neither. In this time I've bumped into her in the gym once or twice and I only said hy and bye, I was acting cold and distant and tried to ignore her. Then after that I was on an outside party event and I passed her not knowing she was there with her sisters. They've stopped me and she was smiling and acting like nothing bad has ever happened between us. She's asked me what I'm up too. I was in a good mood too but have only said that I'm looking for a friend and they should have a great time and I moved along. Everything lasted for about 10s.

 

A couple of weeks back I gave in and wanted to sneak on her FB. I unblocked her and saw she still has me blocked. I wanted to block her back immediately but FB didn't allow me to. 24h should first pass. I forgot all about it. A few days back I was looking at one of my old photos on FB and saw that she once "liked" it. I clicked on her name and there I was on her profile. I forgot that I've unblocked her and looks like she has me unblocked now too. I didn't gave in to the urge and I've immediately left her profile and block her again. This has messed up with my head. Should I unblock her again or leave it as it is? Breadcrumbs, right? I mean, she's still dating that other guy she left me for so this means nothing, right? I'm guessing I should leave it as it is now because if I unblock her again and see that she now has me blocked that will be even more messy for me. The crucial mistake was I even unblocked her in the first place. I also don't know how to act around her. I'm sure I'll bump into her in the gym again and I don't know if that cold and distant approach is good or is just making things worse. I know she'd talk and I could make her smile and everything if I acted like everything is OK between us. She'd even go for a walk or for a coffee I'm sure of that but everything would just mess up with my own head, that's why I want to keep the NC going.

 

It just hit me again today that she's never coming back but I somehow still have the hope that she would. I feel like I'm gonna hope forever. How can I let go completely??? On the other hand I feel like maybe what I'm doing is wrong and I should make her feel good around me when we are together in a gym, not isolate her and maker her feel like I don't care for her at all or that I hold grudge etc. Blocking her on the FB again makes me feel like she'll think I still hold a grudge and am angry at her instead of showing her I'm moving on. I don't know... Man I hate obsessing over what she might think of this or that move I make when she probably doesn't care at all. It makes me anxious and depressed and focusing on her again instead of on myself.

Edited by unforgotten
bigtrouble Established Member

bigtrouble

Posted
Posted (edited)

You went NC and blocked her for one apparent reason you want to heal and move on, if that is your goal and you think this would set you back, just block her again. If you want her back this presents an opportunity, your Alpha Male now. Either way you have to decide what to do, its your heart hanging on the line.

 

Thing is when you bumped into each other, she talked to you, and you acted cool with it, then you unblocked her, she responded by unblocking you too, she's watching you, its a touch-move game. Seeing how you would respond.

 

She is watching you for whatever reason only she knows.

 

Your move bro, goodluck...

Edited by bigtrouble
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unforgotten Established Member

unforgotten

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Thanks bigtrouble.

 

If you want her back this presents an opportunity

 

What kind of opportunity are you referring to? Unblocking her and texting her?

 

Maybe unblock and just do nothing after that?

 

What do others think?

 

:confused:

 

I know one thing though. I've made a promise to myself that I'll never chase(!) a girl again. It puts you in a state of emotional agony. I know how things evolve. You chit chat and you think things are finally getting you somewhere, you get excited and emotionally involved than suddenly BAM, you are rejected and back at page 1 feeling like a mess.

 

I think she's the one who has to do the contacting. She has my gmail, she has my number, she knows where I live and how to reach out. I'm just confused about this FB status now. Maybe it was a wrong move to block her after she has unblocked me. I need to react.

 

Would appreciate more opinions.

Edited by unforgotten
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Invictus01 Established Member

Invictus01

Posted
Posted

I assume she dumped you. In this case, there is only one thing you might think about responding to. That would be - "I am so sorry. I really f@cked up. I really want to make us work again." Anything else is a mindf@ck.

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Light Breeze Established Member

Light Breeze

Posted
Posted
Maybe it was a wrong move to block her after she has unblocked me. I need to react.

 

Why is it wrong? Because you think she'll assume you have a grudge rather than moving on?

 

Actually the correct answer would be: "f**k what she thinks, I'm thinking of ME right now".

 

Seriously, brother, don't overanalyze this one. You werre right to block her again. Seeing her or her "look at me I'm so happy!" posts would just screw your mind and stunt your recovery.

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FortunateSon Established Member

FortunateSon

Posted
Posted

For your healing purposes, block her again.

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seminoles84 Established Member

seminoles84

Posted
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then you unblocked her, she responded by unblocking you too, she's watching you, its a touch-move game. Seeing how you would respond.

 

I wouldn't look into it too much. I highly doubt she's "watching" him. I just feel like all this over analyzing causes more pain. Leave it be OP and move on. Sounds like you've been doing good overall so don't get set back.

 

Also, I doubt she even knew you unblocked her and re-blocked her.

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RedButton Established Member

RedButton

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Posted

If you 'block her' does that actually stop anything from your end? I mean, you still can't see her posts and whatnot unless you send a friend request right?

 

I would block her if you're worried about her trying to contact you, but otherwise can't you just leave her unfriended if you don't want to see her updates and whatnot?

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seminoles84 Established Member

seminoles84

Posted
Posted
If you 'block her' does that actually stop anything from your end? I mean, you still can't see her posts and whatnot unless you send a friend request right?

 

I would block her if you're worried about her trying to contact you, but otherwise can't you just leave her unfriended if you don't want to see her updates and whatnot?

 

This is true as long as they don't have a public profile.

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unforgotten Established Member

unforgotten

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I'll leave her blocked. I think Light Breeze is right. "f**k what she thinks, I'm thinking of ME right now". This is nothing more than mind****. If she thinks I'm gonna go and chase her, send her a friend request or anything like that she's just plain wrong. There are still other communication lines open if she wants to reach out. FB is nothing. She knows how I feel about her and if she wants to get back together she'll have to do some work herself. And yes, she dumped me for another guy after 7 years and they're still together. It's been around 3 months now. For **** sake she basically cheated on me and if she won't want me now because I blocked her on stupid FB, well **** off then, right?

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