Le Franglais Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 Right so my GF and I had an over-text argument 2 nights ago. It was started because she found out I had used her YouTube account to like and comment on a video of MINE. Just as I realised that her comment was on it I went to delete it, but it was to late. She sent me "Using me to get people to like you is not cool". I instantly responded with "Give me a break, Goodnight" --- Foolish, I know. The following morning I sent her an apology. I realised how much of an arsehole I had been. She didn't respond. I waited around 9 hours later, and called her. She didn't answer at first, but 10 mins later she called back. We had a short conversation at the which she said "I'm not in the mood to talk right now" and we said goodnight. After talking to her close friend about what happened, I sent another text to my GF. She responded with this: "I am really, really upset and I don't want to talk about it now because I'm stressed about University and not thinking straight. I don't think we'll see each other before you go, but maybe next time you're in London when things have calmed down". Was this a way of breaking up with me??
Radu Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 Either she lives too much in her YT world, or there is more going on here. If it comes to ending the relationship over YT, then so be it ... it was not worth saving anyway. 3
Satu Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 Right so my GF and I had an over-text argument 2 nights ago. It was started because she found out I had used her YouTube account to like and comment on a video of MINE. Just as I realised that her comment was on it I went to delete it, but it was to late. She sent me "Using me to get people to like you is not cool". I instantly responded with "Give me a break, Goodnight" --- Foolish, I know. The following morning I sent her an apology. I realised how much of an arsehole I had been. She didn't respond. I waited around 9 hours later, and called her. She didn't answer at first, but 10 mins later she called back. We had a short conversation at the which she said "I'm not in the mood to talk right now" and we said goodnight. After talking to her close friend about what happened, I sent another text to my GF. She responded with this: "I am really, really upset and I don't want to talk about it now because I'm stressed about University and not thinking straight. I don't think we'll see each other before you go, but maybe next time you're in London when things have calmed down". Was this a way of breaking up with me?? The answer to your question is contained in the highlighted text above.
Author Le Franglais Posted January 14, 2015 Author Posted January 14, 2015 The answer to your question is contained in the highlighted text above. So she "Maybe" wants to end it with me ... what to do?
Author Le Franglais Posted January 14, 2015 Author Posted January 14, 2015 Either she lives too much in her YT world, or there is more going on here. If it comes to ending the relationship over YT, then so be it ... it was not worth saving anyway. I checked out her YouTube channel (using my own) after the argument just to check what all the fuss was ... not one like, not one subscription, not one comment. My reaction to her saying "Using my YT account to get people to like you is not cool" ... i.e "Give me a break. Good night" ... along with the stresses of work at her University ... probably caused her to get angry.
Satu Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 So she "Maybe" wants to end it with me ... what to do? Give her a bit of time and space. If you make her feel like you're putting any kind of pressure on her she won't like it. Just chill and do other stuff. 1
Author Le Franglais Posted January 14, 2015 Author Posted January 14, 2015 Give her a bit of time and space. If you make her feel like you're putting any kind of pressure on her she won't like it. Just chill and do other stuff. Exactly what I thought ... I think she's going into overdrive with all this work at University to worry about and now this argument we had that was formed out of pretty much nothing But anyway, I'm handing her all the space she needs so she can, but also I can, cool down. I remain hopeful. 1
Author Le Franglais Posted January 14, 2015 Author Posted January 14, 2015 I would consider this a 'break.' I suppose we probably do need a 'break' anyway ... we were running on one leg for quite some time: petty arguments here and there etcetera !! Should I just give her some space and wait till she contacts me?
Author Le Franglais Posted January 14, 2015 Author Posted January 14, 2015 nifoefewf fewfewqfewqfewqf
Author Le Franglais Posted January 14, 2015 Author Posted January 14, 2015 OK guys ... I haven't contacted her ALL DAY and she's just sent me a text asking "When are you going back to Bristol?" What to do?
PegNosePete Posted January 15, 2015 Posted January 15, 2015 Stop with the texting and CALL her. Text messages are limited to 160 characters whereas human voice can convey a whole range of emotion. 1
Frank2thepoint Posted January 15, 2015 Posted January 15, 2015 Either she lives too much in her YT world, or there is more going on here. If it comes to ending the relationship over YT, then so be it ... it was not worth saving anyway. BAM! The boldfaced is the truth. You guys are arguing over petty things, including Youtube comments. Neither of you belong together. I suppose we probably do need a 'break' anyway ... we were running on one leg for quite some time: petty arguments here and there etcetera !! What to do? Take the initiative and just end the relationship. Yes I recommend ending it, not a hiatus. It's not going to get any better between you two.
BlueIris Posted January 15, 2015 Posted January 15, 2015 You violated a personal boundary and then were snotty and dismissive when she was honest with you. Two strikes. I’m surprised by the advice that implies that her perspective doesn’t matter or that being dismissive doesn’t matter. For this relationship or the next, and even for friendships, colleagues and family, think about why someone- anyone- might not like what you did: using their online identity without asking first and getting their ok, and then dismissing their telling you how they feel about it. Put yourself in their shoes. If this is not worth it and you consider it done anyway, then tell her directly and clearly. 1
spiderowl Posted January 16, 2015 Posted January 16, 2015 What you did was invasive and wrong. You used her account without her permission to like your own video. It was childish and narcissistic. Not surprisingly, she is royally cheesed off with your immature behaviour. You might think it was only one little thing but it's the kind of qualities that it represents that upset her: - stalkerish - untrustworthy - self-promoting Your response to her being angry was also inappropriate and would have fanned the flames. She is annoyed and probably thinks you are not mature enough for her. You may well be a decent guy who made a silly mistake. If you want her to stay with you, the best thing you can do is to send a text apologising sincerely for your childish and intrusive behaviour. Say you'll never do such a thing again. Then leave it at that. Give her space to think about this. If she's going to forgive you, she'll get back in touch once she realises you've made a sincere apology and are not going to hassle her to forgive you. 1
bubbaganoosh Posted January 16, 2015 Posted January 16, 2015 She's in college? My God she acts like she's still in grade school bitching because you used a new crayon out of her new box and now the crayon is dull. Text her back and tell her to grow the hell up because she needs to. This is just the most foolish thing I ever heard outside of a third grader.
Danda Posted January 16, 2015 Posted January 16, 2015 I would put my moolah on her not being angry because you used her account to make a comment. My bet is on her being angry because when she told you that what you did was "not cool" (that's a pretty calm and reasonable way to express upset), instead of explaining, you were an aloof, dismissive little snot. Your reaction was basically, "Haha eff off bitch, I do what I want and your feelings don't matter. Night!" Then you let her sit with that all night. Curious, what did your apology in the morning address? Using her account, or the way you acted when she brought it up with you? Because that was the significant thing, right there, not that you used her account. That simply "wasn't cool" of you, which it wasn't, but she wasn't about to dump your ass over it. Otherwise she would have had stronger words than it not being cool. You call it "foolish" but it's not foolishness. It's not like it was a 'whoops'. It was your outright attitude. I wouldn't want to date someone with that sort of attitude. People goof up in little ways, happens. Attitudes about each other's feelings tend to fall into the "is what it is" category. Lesson learned, maybe? Hell I've had moments like that where I in retrospect I knew I had been a total ass. Just gotta let yourself grow from it and change for the better. 1
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