beachlover965 Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 A guy that was interested in me in high school three years ago asked me to be his boyfriend several times. I said no to him because I wasn't ready for a boyfriend at the time. He moved on from me completely last year. We are both 18 by the way. He is a really nice, attractive and caring guy, Now that I am ready for a boyfriend, if he would of asked me today to be his boyfriend, I would say yes right away. I can't get him back because he already has a girlfriend. I feel really guilty for turning him down all that time. I keep thinking to myself if I said yes to him, I would of lost my virginity, had a baby and been married already and this makes me upset that all of this didn't happen already because I said no to him when I was very young. How can I deal with this?
toolforgrowth Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 Whoa, there. You're still really young. Marriage and children were the last thing on my mind when I was your age. Enjoy your youth while you have it, there's plenty of time for marriage and kids. Marriage and kids really change your life...forever. Take this from a divorced 35 year old guy who's a single parent to a 7 year old girl 50% of the time, whose ex wife had daughter from a prior marriage, and whose girlfriend has two daughters, 10 and 3. Children completely changed my life and marriage. I love my daughter more than anything and would literally do anything for her, but children are extremely hard on a relationship, not to mention your life. They're worth every second, but having kids so young can make you feel like you missed out on your youth later in life. Trust me on this, my ex wife went through it and let's just say it caused me to pull the plug on the marriage VERY quickly. Let him go and enjoy your life for you. Do things you enjoy and live your life with integrity. A compatible mate is a natural extension of one living their life that way.
Redhead14 Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 A guy that was interested in me in high school three years ago asked me to be his boyfriend several times. I said no to him because I wasn't ready for a boyfriend at the time. He moved on from me completely last year. We are both 18 by the way. He is a really nice, attractive and caring guy, Now that I am ready for a boyfriend, if he would of asked me today to be his boyfriend, I would say yes right away. I can't get him back because he already has a girlfriend. I feel really guilty for turning him down all that time. I keep thinking to myself if I said yes to him, I would of lost my virginity, had a baby and been married already and this makes me upset that all of this didn't happen already because I said no to him when I was very young. How can I deal with this? You are not feeling guilt, it's remorse and regret. There will be many more things like this in your life and you must learn to put them in the past in order for you to move on to a fulfilling future for yourself. There are tons of what ifs in life. You were in a different place in your life and head at THAT time. Now you are apparently at a point in your life where you're feeling like you want what you could have had then. This is how you're feeling NOW. You can't go back. Start dating with these goals in mind.
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