angiefly Posted January 13, 2015 Posted January 13, 2015 This is a new year, so I wanted to see if everyone would post the best/worst love advice they had ever gotten. So, what would be the BEST and WORST advice you've ever received/learned about marriage/relationships. I'd love to hear the wisdom from across the globe here
Dontfindme Posted January 13, 2015 Posted January 13, 2015 After getting dumped, and badly wanting to work it out with my ex, a friend of mine suggested I "follow my heart" and "give it my all." That was both the best, and the worst advice - because I did end up trying to reconcile with my ex for a whole week, even though I was the dumpee. I got rejected again, and again which was terrible on me emotionally. But I got it all out of my system - which was great. There was no wondering or hoping. That was it, and I had to accept it. And I did. Also, the good thing about getting that advice was that, now I know NEVER to do it again.
Michelle ma Belle Posted January 13, 2015 Posted January 13, 2015 (edited) Oh boy... Probably the WORST advice was from my mother of all people. During a time in marriage when my husband and I were really struggling and I was at a loss for what I could do to make things better my mother promoted the notion that looking a certain way (aka put your make-up on, dye your hair, buy lingerie and act like June Cleaver) would somehow save my marriage. And so I did what she said. I knocked myself out trying to fit into this stereotypical yet unrealistic mold both in appearance and attitude and in the end it was all for not. I ended up with an eating disorder and ultimately almost lost myself in process. I mean, what was she thinking with that kind of advice especially since she and my father took great pride in raising me to be MORE than just a pretty face with no voice. Geez. As for the BEST advice, it came from my therapist. I had spent several years with her talking about every detail about my life especially my unhappy marriage. During one emotional session regarding the direction of my marriage, she looked me in the eyes and asked me; "If this is as good as it will ever be in your marriage, is it good enough?" I've spoken about this question in countless posts on here. At first I thought it was such a silly and simple question only to realize just how profound it really was. Thinking about that question...like really thinking about it and seeking the answer to that singular question changed my life and for the better. That question was SO good that I've asked it of a great many things in my life as it applies to a variety things other than just relationships. Edited January 13, 2015 by Michelle ma Belle 3
Dontfindme Posted January 14, 2015 Posted January 14, 2015 I wanted to bump this up - as I feel we could all benefit from this.
Recommended Posts