I want to share my wife [Candaulism]

[ZeEnzo]

I am in my late 20's and my wife is in her early 30's. We have a healthy life style, agreed not to have children and so far, no major trouble in our life. She is smoking hot (no joke) and we both are having the best sex together. We are also the very jealous, and the idea of my wife being up to something behind my back can drive me crazy. However, as I recently read some of her messages she had with her girlfriends when we started dating, and went further in the past because I could not stop it. I told her, and she agreed during one of our fun/sex nights to relate me some of her experiences. And she had a lot, but at this point I want to add that I am deeply in love with my wife, and entirely devoted to her.

 

I've been unfaithful in the past, and so has she, big time, according to her. She also told me that she had a threesome with two total strangers and often went to hotels to hook up for one night stand. She also had several affairs with married men. You might think that she's a slut, which she probably is, but she is first and foremost the most caring and loving wife. Far from getting angry or incredibly jealous to hear such dirty stories from her mouth, I got extremely aroused. She gave me details about how she was giving a head to one guy whilst being banged from behind by the other, waiting to be ****ed in rounds, and finally receive their cum on her pretty face.

 

During one of our intercourses, she asked me "what is your ultimate fantasy?" and I've been foolish enough to admit that my ultimate fantasy was to see her ****ed in front of me by different men. She got incredibly wet, so I kept telling her how much I would enjoy seeing the real slut she has inside, and we both came in powerful orgasms. We've been talking a lot about it recently, and the last time we got high and horny, I got her to install a dating app on her brand new phone I offered her. We started having fun, imagining how we could turn someone in our little affair.

 

However, last monday, she texted me early in the morning, calling it off, and telling me that it is beyond her boundaries. Going from close to see my ultimate fantasy with my wife, who calls herself my partner in crime, to calling it off made me feel empty. I can't take this idea out of my head, and I deeply, madly, insanely want to see her flirting, chatting, laughing, and more with other men. I don't know where this is coming from, she especially told me that having this kind of fantasy and wanting to realise them so early in our marriage is scary.

 

So, is this fantasy normal?

Is having threesome with strangers beyond husband/wife voyeurism complicity sex?

Am I too young to have this kind of kinky dreams?

 

Thank you for reading,

 

I'm eager to provide additional details and answers, as long as comments remain respectful to both my wife and I.

[runredlights]

I couldn't ever imagine doing what you're proposing. What if your wife changes her mind and agrees to it and then once you see the other guy sick his sick into your wife you freak the **** out and change your mind? It would be too late at that point. I can't imagine sharing a lover with someone else personally, but its your prerogative.

 

Unless you're sure without a shadow of a doubt that you want to cuckold yourself I think you should step back and reevaluate how ready you are to handle something like this too. I cast no judgement towards you at all btw. I'm just trying to understand where you're coming from. I don't mean to sound degrading and as a man you may take this the wrong way, but could you possibly have some submissive tendencies? Its ok to to let someone else take control in relationships/sex, but this seems like the most extreme form is submissiveness. I could be totally off base though. Where did your desire for this stem from?

 

Has your wife considered letting you bring another woman into the bedroom?

[ZeEnzo]

Don't worry, no offence taken. At all.Iit will be hard though to summarise where I come from, I can just tell that my wife and I live very comfortably, and enjoy a perfect marriage so far. I used to be very jealous, and such thought would have had me puke in my previous relationships. Giving it some thought, I realised that my wife is the sexiest woman I've ever been with, and I am not afraid to see her getting old, as I really want to spend my lifetime with her. I used to be unfaithful at the point that I could not stop myself from flirting with attractive women, even when my ex-girfriends were around.

 

But I changed, and I feel so proud of my wife, even her sexual history flatters my ego because I know that she has been enjoying herself, which let's not be hypocrite would not happen to the average woman. She is also successful in the corporate life, and her sharp mind caught off guard right from the beginning. She has a special sparkle in her look that makes me defenceless, especially when she is a bit tipsy. Then I transpose myself to those you did pick her up, or would have in my fantasy, and here comes the arousal. It's not so much about the submissiveness, we interchange during our fun night dominant/dominated positions with the same fun.

 

I also realised that I nourished the fear of being frustrated, and I hold myself. I am what women call "good lover". I can last, and now how to make my wife satisfied multiple times in a row, sometimes in very short intervals. I am not bragging about myself, although I know my ego is very hard to hurt. So I don't fear seeing my wife banged by other dicks, may they are twice big as mine, as long as she comes. It has to be our enjoyment, I don't know what to add except that I am very obsessed with this idea.

[Mal78]

Don't worry, no offence taken. At all.Iit will be hard though to summarise where I come from, I can just tell that my wife and I live very comfortably, and enjoy a perfect marriage so far. I used to be very jealous, and such thought would have had me puke in my previous relationships. Giving it some thought, I realised that my wife is the sexiest woman I've ever been with, and I am not afraid to see her getting old, as I really want to spend my lifetime with her. I used to be unfaithful at the point that I could not stop myself from flirting with attractive women, even when my ex-girfriends were around.

 

But I changed, and I feel so proud of my wife, even her sexual history flatters my ego because I know that she has been enjoying herself, which let's not be hypocrite would not happen to the average woman. She is also successful in the corporate life, and her sharp mind caught off guard right from the beginning. She has a special sparkle in her look that makes me defenceless, especially when she is a bit tipsy. Then I transpose myself to those you did pick her up, or would have in my fantasy, and here comes the arousal. It's not so much about the submissiveness, we interchange during our fun night dominant/dominated positions with the same fun.

 

I also realised that I nourished the fear of being frustrated, and I hold myself. I am what women call "good lover". I can last, and now how to make my wife satisfied multiple times in a row, sometimes in very short intervals. I am not bragging about myself, although I know my ego is very hard to hurt. So I don't fear seeing my wife banged by other dicks, may they are twice big as mine, as long as she comes. It has to be our enjoyment, I don't know what to add except that I am very obsessed with this idea.

 

I think you have changed because you love and adore your wife so much. I also believe she has changed for the same reasons. I'm concerned that she would do this for you eventually even though she really doesn't want to.

 

She told you once she doesn't want to. How many more times will you bring it up?

[ZeEnzo]

Yes I think that we both changed, and I should be grateful for it. I am now trying to understand where this idea is coming from and how to move on. I definitely don't want to spoil the strong relationship we built so far. Life has so many more enjoyment elsewhere. It was just hard to accept that we both agreed with the idea of trying, and that she called it off out of the blue.

[ZeEnzo]

Has your wife considered letting you bring another woman into the bedroom?

 

Once during sex she once told me "I'm such a slut you should cheat on me", but I know for sure it was only to turn me on and she wouldn't go that far. And neither would I. I know that I don't event want another woman.

[Zahara]

When I read threads like this I often wonder how people aren't worried about STDs. It would scare the crap out of me. Condoms can only do so little. My gf called yesterday and she found a wart in her mouth and throat from contracting HPV low risk (genital warts). And she's in a long term relationship. But when you go down this road, what are the chances.

 

I digress.

[kamani]

My husband has a similar fantasy as yours but he is bisexual. Unlike yours our sex life was rocky and he cheated on me with men, in the past. I know he is so turned on by these fantacies,threesome talks etc. When I discourage this idea he again becomes turned off.

 

I'm not sure whether these fantasies are normal but I know the majority of their partners will reject to put them into reality. As one poster said STD is a main issue. Other risk of this is your wife can fall in love with someone else.

[oldshirt]

We have done a lot of swinging in the past (...and still are open to the idea of it but don't really lift a finger to do much about it anymore). I do not share your deep desire to see my wife others as I am more into couple/couple and group sex and FMF threesomes etc but I can tell you it is not a rare fantasy at all for either men or women. While I don't know any actual statistics, I can say from personal experience, there are lots of men that have similar fantasies so while it is arguable to call it "normal," it certainly is not rare and there is a whole porn genre built upon it.

 

One thing of particular note any time someone brings up this topic is concepts like jealousy and particularly cheating, don't have the same relevance as they do in traditional, monogamous relationships.

 

Having consensual 3somes or moresomes is not cheating, it is something that both parties want to experience together. You will not experience the same set of emotions than if someone were to cheat without your consent or foreknowledge. It's something that couples consensually do together for their mutual enjoyment. The feelings and fallout associated with cheating just simply don't apply and aren't relevant.

 

Jealousy can rear it's head but it's a whole different form of jealousy. If present at all (which it rarely is in mutually consensual encounters) it's more in the form of feeling left out if your partner is giving more attention and consideration to the other party(s). One of the primary rules to address this is to always give each other you very best effort even with new bodies in bed.

 

When we began swinging, the thing that surprised us the most was the lack of jealousy and insecurity and how natural and normal it felt to have others in our bed.

 

Mutual consent is the game changer. It changes everything and everything in the past that you have experienced with cheating does not apply. It's a completely different situation.