Not sure how to take this one, how should I handle?

[Isitme05]

Hey ppl, Hopefully I didn't mess this up yet.

 

So I go get a first date. We had a 20 min initial phone call during the week and then set up a Saturday date all while having some playful and somewhat humorous texting.

 

So far so good

 

Come Saturday, we meet at a park and walk to get something to eat. I pulled out her chair to sit first. Now I honestly believe that our conversation flowed pretty well. I laughed, she laughed, I shared stories and hobbies etc. she shared stories and hobbies etc.

When the bill came she went for her purse but I told her its fine I got it.

 

Of course I paid attention to her and I didn't dominate the conversations. There were very few, very brief silent moments but they were played off as just enjoying the walk or scenery.

 

So after eating we take a walk to see what music was playing, listened to it for a while and then saw some art creation demonstrations for a bit. And of course I tried to make her laugh with a few well placed comments.

 

While walking away from the art demos I asked if she would be up for a drink or two and she was all for it.

So we found a bar and ordered. Our conversation got a bit deeper and I got a little more physical, but respectful.

I put my arm at the back of her chair and gently touched her the middle of her back occasionally, She let me pull her hair away from her ear to see a new earring, she got, She let me smell close to her chest for a new perfume, When the music was loud we both put our mouths close to each others ear to talk. And once again, the conversation flowed well and we got to know a good bit about one another

 

So i offered a last drink and she declined so we closed the tab.

I walked her to her car and we spoke for about a minute or two there and then I gave her a little gag gift referencing an earlier text joke we had. Nothing extravagant, just something to show I thought about her and hopefully something that would keep me on her mind. Its also something she can use.

 

Now here is where I may have messed up.........I didn't go for the first date kiss.

I did however mention that we should get together again and hugged and cheek kissed her. I don't recall her replying to my get together suggestion and also don't recall her cheek kissing me but she did hug back. She offered to drop me to my car but I respectfully declined.

 

I watched her drive off to ensure she left safely (I thought it was the gentleman thing to do)

But before she drove off, she turned down her window to make sure I was ok cause I was just standing there.

 

So after about an hour and half after the date was done and I was home I texted her to make sure she was safe home and I also called her a funny title she gave herself (I did this to reference the fun and also show that I remembered the title)

 

When she said she made it home fine I texted that I had a great time and that we should do it again soon

 

To which she replied that she was glad I made it home safe too and had a good time as well (again no reciprocation to going out again)

 

 

Ok guys, did I slip up anywhere?

Any signs you see here that I don't?

What would you have done differently?

What should be my next step?

 

We just met, so I cant say that she's "the One" yet, but I'd love to see this girl again, she seems like the real deal.

[CarrieT]

You are WAY over-analyzing.

 

Sounds like everything went just fine and there is nothing you messed up doing. Not having a first kiss on a first date is a-okay.

 

Just follow-up for a second date. Most people can't tell if it is the "the one" until several dates/several months. Don't push so hard.

 

You are fine.

[Redhead14]

Hey ppl, Hopefully I didn't mess this up yet.

 

So I go get a first date. We had a 20 min initial phone call during the week and then set up a Saturday date all while having some playful and somewhat humorous texting.

 

So far so good

 

Come Saturday, we meet at a park and walk to get something to eat. I pulled out her chair to sit first. Now I honestly believe that our conversation flowed pretty well. I laughed, she laughed, I shared stories and hobbies etc. she shared stories and hobbies etc.

When the bill came she went for her purse but I told her its fine I got it.

 

Of course I paid attention to her and I didn't dominate the conversations. There were very few, very brief silent moments but they were played off as just enjoying the walk or scenery.

 

So after eating we take a walk to see what music was playing, listened to it for a while and then saw some art creation demonstrations for a bit. And of course I tried to make her laugh with a few well placed comments.

 

While walking away from the art demos I asked if she would be up for a drink or two and she was all for it.

So we found a bar and ordered. Our conversation got a bit deeper and I got a little more physical, but respectful.

I put my arm at the back of her chair and gently touched her the middle of her back occasionally, She let me pull her hair away from her ear to see a new earring, she got, She let me smell close to her chest for a new perfume, When the music was loud we both put our mouths close to each others ear to talk. And once again, the conversation flowed well and we got to know a good bit about one another

 

So i offered a last drink and she declined so we closed the tab.

I walked her to her car and we spoke for about a minute or two there and then I gave her a little gag gift referencing an earlier text joke we had. Nothing extravagant, just something to show I thought about her and hopefully something that would keep me on her mind. Its also something she can use.

 

Now here is where I may have messed up.........I didn't go for the first date kiss.

I did however mention that we should get together again and hugged and cheek kissed her. I don't recall her replying to my get together suggestion and also don't recall her cheek kissing me but she did hug back. She offered to drop me to my car but I respectfully declined.

 

I watched her drive off to ensure she left safely (I thought it was the gentleman thing to do)

But before she drove off, she turned down her window to make sure I was ok cause I was just standing there.

 

So after about an hour and half after the date was done and I was home I texted her to make sure she was safe home and I also called her a funny title she gave herself (I did this to reference the fun and also show that I remembered the title)

 

When she said she made it home fine I texted that I had a great time and that we should do it again soon

 

To which she replied that she was glad I made it home safe too and had a good time as well (again no reciprocation to going out again)

 

 

Ok guys, did I slip up anywhere?

Any signs you see here that I don't?

What would you have done differently?

What should be my next step?

 

We just met, so I cant say that she's "the One" yet, but I'd love to see this girl again, she seems like the real deal.

 

You are overanalyzing a little. The only thing I think you should have done differently was to be more specific about get together again. You should have mentioned a specific day, time and place.

 

I would call her soon to set up a specific date. You should do all of the initiating for the first couple of months and she should reciprocate if she's interested. After a couple of months, she should initiate once to every two of yours.

 

In the very beginning its about balance, you initiate, she reciprocates in kind.

 

For now, make sure you call her, ask her for a specific date and go from there.

[d0nnivain]

Seems OK. The only way to know for sure is to invite her for the 2nd date.

[Gaeta]

 

What would you have done differently?

 

Invite her on a second date at the end of the first date OR ask her when she is available during that conversation after the date.

 

'lets do this again soon' means nothing. It's not an invite, you're not checking her schedule, it's just some polite thing to say with no serious intention behind.

 

Contact her and ask her when she is available next to do something together.

[losangelena]

I've never docked a guy for failing to go in for a first date kiss. I almost prefer it—shows they're not in such a rush.

 

Have fun and relax!

[Assada]

The while thing sounds fine.

 

The only thing that is a little weird, is you trying tolock her down to another date quickly.

Dont do that.

- As counter-intuitive as it sounds, dont try to lock her down to go out with you the next time you too talk.

 

Also, dont be needy for conversation, and to hear from her.

Do your own thing,

 

 

Key thing too - see other women

[Isitme05]

Thanks for all your advice. I will definitely try to incorporate all the best methods and of course RELAX and just be myself.

Quick question for you though.

 

If the date was Saturday night and I texted her the same night to ensure she was home safe and let her know I had fun, then would a Tuesday evening call to have a brief chat and maybe set up a second date for the middle of the following week be pushing it, waiting too long or just fine?

 

I cant do this Saturday because I had prior plans.

[losangelena]

Contact her when you want to. But yes, that's fine.

[Assada]

Tuesday would be fine.

But like I said, dont feel any need to lock her down to another date.

Youmight just want to talk to her and catch up with her and not set a date for anything.

 

Feel her out, and check if she's good for you as well.

 

Also, As I said before, SET UP DATES with other women

[Isitme05]

Yeah, I WILL set up other dates, I just think we're adults and If she isn't interested, just say so.

 

By the way, I call her today (Tuesday) and no answer and I tried leaving a voicemail but the system has some error and wouldnt let me.

 

So I left a text along the lines of "guess you're not around, Ill try you another time." I'll probably message her one last time maybe later in the week or next week and if no reply still then PIECE OUT!