Christophe Posted January 10, 2015 Posted January 10, 2015 So today is exactly a year since I met my ex. It has been 7 months since she broke up with me. I am going to do my best not to dwell on the perfect night I experienced a year ago and try to occupy myself as much as possible today. I will go out tonight with some friends (I think this is better than sitting at home) but I hope it is okay and thoughts and memories don't come flooding back too much. I know over the last couple of months I have improved and I don't think about her as often, however there are times when I do miss her a lot. She is not on the pedestal that she used to be on although I really miss the intimacy and how crazy about me she was. Also how effortless it was falling in love with her. Something I had never experienced before and have not experienced again since. I had a great dream last night of meeting another girl in an airport (probably related to my ex as we were LDR and met a few times like this). The dream was so vivid and I remember feeling the exact same way I did as when I fell in love with my ex. If only it was real! Just wondered if any of you have any advice for me because it is a pretty big milestone for me today. I am trying to be kind with myself and not try too hard not to think of her today. I hope I have a positive day.
Satu Posted January 10, 2015 Posted January 10, 2015 Just wondered if any of you have any advice for me because it is a pretty big milestone for me today. I am trying to be kind with myself and not try too hard not to think of her today. I hope I have a positive day. My best advice for you is that you should inform yourself about Limerence. 1
Author Christophe Posted January 11, 2015 Author Posted January 11, 2015 Hard not to feel a little sad and empty today. The time with my ex was the best and most beautiful experience of my life. I know that now it is long gone just feel quite reflective as it is exactly a year since we met. Saw some friends last night but came home early as they all went to dance. Didn't really feel in the mood for it and just kind of felt quite sad. I think part of the trouble now is things seem a bit predictable. When I met my ex I was planning a trip to New Zealand and had a real spirit of adventure about me. Now I am back home and need to figure out a better job and finding a career. My ex was also kind of lucky as we met to improve each others' language and then ended up falling in love. That kind of romantic situation is no longer present in my life. I have a better social life than I did when I met my ex but I find it quite hard when we just kind of meet up and drink and talk for a couple of hours and then I go home. I want more than that and want to experience a connection with someone like I did with my ex. I am grateful for the friends I have now I just get a little lonely and disconnected at times. I even feel a little insecure in the group even though they are all nice, friendly people. I don't want to keep going back to her but my ex was the one person I have truly been myself with and confident and comfortable with. I just feel a long way from that at the moment. I am doing my best to keep my head up and I am doing things to occupy myself such as guitar, swimming, gym, football, salsa dancing, Spanish etc but I still don't feel happy. It's strange because sometimes I feel really good about myself. Then these nights come along where I just miss her even though I know she is no longer the same girl I fell in love with. Had a good day today so far I have played guitar for a while and applied for a job so trying to focus on these positives. Any advice would be greatly appreciated
Ieris Posted January 11, 2015 Posted January 11, 2015 The time with my ex was the best and most beautiful experience of my life. You have to think "The time with my ex was the best and most beautiful experience of my life so far". Many more beautiful experiences are yet to come as long as you are opened to them. 2
Author Christophe Posted January 11, 2015 Author Posted January 11, 2015 Thank you Ieris I am doing my best to be open to new experiences I guess they just haven't come along yet. 1
coolheadal Posted January 11, 2015 Posted January 11, 2015 Your not alone on this subject. Everyone goes though this pain and hurt. But the bright side you need to let go of what you had in the PAST and think of the NOW! That's what your not doing is focusing on the NOW, PRESENT, SEC, MIN, and the HOUR. All you can think about day in and day out it with the Ex life you had with the Ex! But your Ex has moved on and not thinking about you so why do you do it? You can't help yourself. If that time with the Ex was so wonderful you would have been with the person instead of being the Ex also. Life is already short and you should take all the those photos of your Ex out of the place of residence and anything that attaches you to the Ex and put it in the trash or give it away. Need to also change things around the place you live in too. Even go so far to paint it. Do whatever you have to change your daily routine. Once you get back to 100% now go find someone you'll be happy with and in most of all be in love with. The past life is gone it will never come back. Holding on to that memory won't do you much good! Actually your now feeling yourself. Got to stay positive and have clear thinking! Focus on that new JOB and Career you want. Those are your goal, then once you get those then find that person you seek to be with! 1
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