loneyBird Posted March 28, 2005 Posted March 28, 2005 my long story very short..... ex dumps me because he wants me to "find myself" then askes if he can move in with me in a year. but he still doesnt want me back I start dating other people and he gets mad..defensive ....and very angry with me.... tells me to F** off and to stop calling him. what?????????? What did he want from me?????
CurlyIam Posted March 28, 2005 Posted March 28, 2005 Easy one: he wanted to have you, not invest any feelings, and have you at his pesonal disposition. You were to wait for his Royal Heighness until he felt like giving you the time a day. Basically he didn't want you to move on with your life, considering he wasn't about to have a relationship with you. Advice: continue to go on with your life and take his advice: don't call him. That will shut his mouth up. BTW: kudos for you for being so smart and moving on !
Author loneyBird Posted March 28, 2005 Author Posted March 28, 2005 I think he may have alot of narccistic tendencies....in the way that he had absolutly NO concideration for my feelings AT all. It still makes me sad though...because i still love him and hate the fact that he treated me that way....but the truth is there are way better more loving people out there in the world. And maybe one day I will be lucky enough to find one. There is no way I'll call him after this....but i still dont understand well one...why he even got mad at me....and why if he broke up with me....why he wouldnt want me to move on with my life???
LucreziaBorgia Posted March 28, 2005 Posted March 28, 2005 He wanted to give you the impression that he had your best interests in mind, even though he didn't. Some people pull this noble "I only want what's best for you" crap on you and if you dare call their bluff and take them up on it, they'll make you pay for it. Its what people do when they are in a situation where they don't want to put in any time, effort or be obligated in any way: but they still want to be able to reap benefits from it when it suits them. They feel they are entitled or that you 'owe them something' after they were so 'kind, generous and had only your best interests in mind'.
RoxStar Posted March 28, 2005 Posted March 28, 2005 Originally posted by LucreziaBorgia He wanted to give you the impression that he had your best interests in mind, even though he didn't. Some people pull this noble "I only want what's best for you" crap on you and if you dare call their bluff and take them up on it, they'll make you pay for it. Its what people do when they are in a situation where they don't want to put in any time, effort or be obligated in any way: but they still want to be able to reap benefits from it when it suits them. They feel they are entitled or that you 'owe them something' after they were so 'kind, generous and had only your best interests in mind'. Why do they do that though??? This is somewhat similar to what I am experiencing but different at the same time. I just dont understand why someone would dangle the carrot in this situation living together but not really want to back it up?
Donut Posted March 28, 2005 Posted March 28, 2005 Because they don't want you, but nobody else can have you, it's pure selfishness!
RoxStar Posted March 28, 2005 Posted March 28, 2005 I agree that its purely selfish but I just dont understand the thinking that if you dont want someone why keep them hanging on?
Author loneyBird Posted March 28, 2005 Author Posted March 28, 2005 I want to know the answer to this too! UGGGGG Why...why....why...
CurlyIam Posted March 28, 2005 Posted March 28, 2005 Originally posted by RoxStar I agree that its purely selfish but I just dont understand the thinking that if you dont want someone why keep them hanging on? Answer: who cares? Who do moms starve their kids to death? Why are people mean to eachother? WHO CARES??? Go on with your life. They do it because they don't want to let go. they want you to be there waiting because it does a world of good to their ego knowing that someone's putting all their life on hold for one sign of his little hand! And they don't have to put any effort in it, like actually be in a relationship. Stop thinking, erase him from your min, phone agenda and email address book and keep doing what you're doing. Emotionally too!
Author loneyBird Posted March 28, 2005 Author Posted March 28, 2005 What should I do... i still miss him and love him and its killing me..... I can't stand that hes acting this way How can I get this to stop?
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