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confusion re. intimacy in new relationship


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Posted

I am in a new relationship with a girl been about a month. We r really close i feel but when it comes to intimacy its really awkward. She is only 20 I'm 26. She is just fresh out of an extremely physical relationship. I'm not violent at all i won't even smack my daughter I don't feel there is a need. There are alternative ways. But yea when we get intimate I don't mean sex just cuddling kissing etc. Sometimes she really likes it and wants it then other times all I do is put my hand on her and she will say F off!! I'm really confused. Like i feel like deep down she wants it but maybe has barriers up?? I don't think she has had this type of intimacy before. I'm a very intimate and emotional person so this is hard for me. Lately I have just been taking a step back and letting her decide wat she wants?? But then I feel like she thinks I'm not into her?? Any advice please. Thanks mark

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Posted

Physically abusive relationship

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Posted

She talks to you and tells you to F off??

- like youre some stranger on the street?

 

Well... sounds like she doesnt respect you. not one bit.

Interesting that you compare her physical abuse to you disciplining your child.

- Thats what she sounds like. And now you sound like some doting Daddy-figure.

 

Either get her to respect you, or move on

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Posted

Yea like one minute we r all close doing stuff and its all sweet then next minute I'll get to close and she snaps and I'm like wtf?? And she will say something like oh ur body temp is too hot?? And yea she has a lil girl too who has no father he is on drugs etc. So I'm like her new girls father now... I'm not here for that tho like yea I love kids but my daughter is way more important than both of them

Posted

Has she had therapy or counselling because of her previous relationship?

 

It's not up to you to clarify what her feelings or intentions are, it's not up to you to heal her, bring her forward, or help her.

 

Those are all things she has to do for herself.

If she is unwilling, reluctant or downright refuses to consider doing anything with therapy/counselling - then break this relationship off.

It won't get better, she will get worse and she will damage YOU in the process.

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Posted

She's highly dysfunctional.

 

Avoid her like the plague.

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