Why do guys constantly think a girl is going to "trap" them by getting pregnant?

[autumnnight]

Unintended Pregnancy in the United States

 

The Shriver Report ? Why are 50 Percent of Pregnancies in the U.S. Unplanned?

 

Okay, I will say I am impressed

 

Many people just throw stuff out there based on "their friends"

[Diezel]

I'm beginning to wonder if there will be any man on earth who actually LIKES, respects, and trusts women for my daughter to marry. Cause I hope like heck she doesn't get stuck with a woman bashing, paranoid, whiner.

 

She'll find someone, after she gets pregnant first.

[Better]

Strangely, I've actually had two women claim to be pregnant with my child in the past few years. Since I didn't have unprotected sex with them, I wasn't terribly concerned.

 

Also, I had a vasectomy ten years ago that I never talked about with them prior to the incidents so I was pretty sure that "it wasn't me". When faced with that, both women admitted that they had cheated on me and were quickly jettisoned from my life.

 

Bullet: dodged.

[serial muse]

Unintended Pregnancy in the United States

 

The Shriver Report ? Why are 50 Percent of Pregnancies in the U.S. Unplanned?

 

I don't think those stats tell of unplanned pregnancies that were engineered by the moms though, so not really applicable. The implication is that they were unplanned according to all.

[Mangina]

I don't think those stats tell of unplanned pregnancies that were engineered by the moms though, so not really applicable. The implication is that they were unplanned according to all.

 

Engineered by the mom would probably be less than 10 ppercent just my guess

[A O]

What is it with guys worrying about a girl purposely getting pregnant? They always think a girl "lies" about being on birth control. I find that insulting. Do guys really think about this when they are dating a girl? I'm not understanding this, if they say that, does that mean they don't ever want kids?

Its human nature to be mindful of pitfalls no matter how rare they may be and back in the day when men were sole providers (or even the main provider) it was pertinent of men to be mindful of this situation simply because it did happen. Rare though it was. It has very little to do with how willing a guy may be towards wanting kids and more, if not mainly, to do with not being trapped into something they didn't agree to.

[Maleficent]

That is not much of a choice; not getting married is a better choice.

 

whichever works for you. I was responding to the guy complaining men had no power.

[Els]

What you are suggesting is giving up sex with everyone but escorts and eventually your wife.

 

Well, yes, obviously it is not an ideal situation.There are various steps that can be taken, each with a risk reduction and difficulty of their own - this ranges from condoms, to a vasectomy, to abstaining from intercourse until you know the person well. Nothing in life is perfect - either you consent to take the risks or you take steps to remove them, even if you don't like those steps. This applies to many other areas of life too, not just sex.

 

Elswyth, child support does not belong to you it belongs to the child. A child support waiver is not valid in a court of law. You cannot legally sign away another person's rights. Many men have discovered this in court too late.

 

Ah, interesting, thanks for informing me.

 

So that guy who got paid to impregnate women and said they signed child support waivers is going to be in for a surprise...

 

34-year-old virgin becomes father of 82 after launching free 'baby making' service | Daily Mail Online

[Radu]

Okay, I will say I am impressed

 

Many people just throw stuff out there based on "their friends"

 

It was pretty common sense tbh; even ppl who are married and are ok with kids in general may not have wanted a kid right then and there, but it happened so ... whatever.

[Radu]

I'm beginning to wonder if there will be any man on earth who actually LIKES, respects, and trusts women for my daughter to marry. Cause I hope like heck she doesn't get stuck with a woman bashing, paranoid, whiner.

 

Well, if she is a balanced individual with good solid boundaries, who can see both sides of an argument, i think she'll do great ... there aren't that many ppl like that around and like attracts like.

[Nolan 93]

To me it's, if can't see myself having a child with that peticular woman then I won't have sex with you. It's just how I was raised, morals and what not. With my current ex, I was more than willing to have a child with her...but when the time was right.

[Radu]

Ah, interesting, thanks for informing me.

 

So that guy who got paid to impregnate women and said they signed child support waivers is going to be in for a surprise...

 

34-year-old virgin becomes father of 82 after launching free 'baby making' service | Daily Mail Online

 

Depends if it was done through a sperm bank or not.

 

This reminds me of something else; other women who actually do this, a ONS with the intent to get pregnant or a FWB with the same intent can be lesbian couples.

And they tend to believe that tricking the guy is beneficial to him, and will not result in any problems for him later on [including signing the waiver thing].

[Sassy Girl]

for very damn good reasons!

 

honestly, about 95% of the girls I've slept with did not care whether I wore a condom or not the first time we slept together...

 

my ex gf, who was not on BC, wanted me to not wear a condom either and would often try to get me to finish inside her. if i didn't make her take plan B the times we didn't use protection, she fully wouldn't. i know she wanted to get pregnant with me. but this kind of behaviour (esp early in our relationship) led me to devalue her strongly and was part of the reason I didn't see her as marriage material.

 

facts are that there are a lot of women who do have these mindsets and it's disgusting and beyond selfish.

maybe this says something about the type of woman you are choosing?

[autumnnight]

Well, if she is a balanced individual with good solid boundaries, who can see both sides of an argument, i think she'll do great ... there aren't that many ppl like that around and like attracts like.

 

Oh she is. She's a smart cookie. She also has the capacity for logic so that she can separate a real statistical threat with just another paranoid rant.

[clevelander321]

It happens quite often. Often times to varying extremes.

 

I knew a girl that had 4 babies with different men and put them all up for adoption once the man left her. Now that is extreme, but she had the children to keep the man around.

 

Also, a small percentage of men sleep with most of the women. These men are the type that women want to keep for themselves. What better way that to get pregnant?

[mario_C]

It's one of the ironies of life...the worst job in the world (parent) is the easiest to get and the one job where quitting is not an option. (Deadbeat and absentee parents are the scum of the earth, whether they be male or female.)

So why wouldn't one avoid that fate, while still wanting to enjoy intimate pleasure? What century is this?

So please, be careful. Because yes, some people are devious and try to trick their partner into causing a pregnancy. No, it doesn't happen often, any more than getting caught by a serial killer happens often, but I'm not hanging out in the woods after dark, no matter how much camping sounds like fun.

[Robert Z]

No, it doesn't happen often, any more than getting caught by a serial killer happens often,

 

 

LOL! It is far more common than that.

[Rejected Rosebud]

No, it doesn't happen often, any more than getting caught by a serial killer happens often, but I'm not hanging out in the woods after dark, no matter how much camping sounds like fun.

I'm sad that you won't go camping because of your fear of serial killers!

[Robert Z]

To hang onto the right guy, some women may go as far as getting pregnant.

 

Of the millions of pregnancies reported annually in the United States, about half are considered unintended or unplanned. At the same time, nine in ten women report using birth control—the most popular of which is more than 90 percent effective.

 

Melinda Spohn, a social worker and researcher at Spokane Falls Community College in Washington, decided to study why so many of her clients told her that their pregnancies were unplanned, despite the variety of easily available birth control.

 

Some of the women admitted that they had not used birth control with guys who had appealing characteristics. To determine whether such behavior is widespread, Spohn surveyed nearly 400 women at two community colleges. More than a third of women said they had risked pregnancy in the past with men who had attractive qualities—such as commitment to the relationship, good financial prospects or the desire for a family—but hadn't discussed the possibility of pregnancy with their partner. It was unclear how many women actually became pregnant.

Not-So-Accidental Pregnancies | Psychology Today

 

In America, they even have a name for this - they call them 'gotcha' pregnancies. Many of the women involved deliberately avoid birth control and have no intention of letting their unwitting bedfellow know this. ...

Dr. Helen: "Getting pregnant accidentally on purpose."

 

Amy Alkon and I discuss women who accidentally get pregnant on purpose and whether men have any rights in this situation at all in this week's segment on PJTV.

Dr. Helen: PJTV: Gotcha pregnancies and men's rights

 

Other similar situations may arise. For example what about the situation where one partner wants a child, but the other is reluctant? A woman may assert her maternal ambitions by frequently 'forgetting' to take her contraceptive pill thereby becoming pregnant 'accidentally on purpose'.

The causes of unplanned pregnancy

 

More and more women in their late ‘30s, knowing only too well that this could be their last “fertility train,” resort to one-night-stands to get pregnant, Spicer states. They are often calculated and choose their prey according to well-established criteria, which is where the term of “gotcha” pregnancies has come into play from.

 

However, unlike what ladies once used to do with men they were looking to marry, this time around, the sole purpose of the encounter is that of making a baby, regardless of whether the father becomes involved or not.

 

Surprisingly enough, Spicer explains, the phenomenon has not only started gaining proportions, but is also being developed down to an art. It also goes by the name of getting pregnant “accidentally on purpose,” and has women traveling to far-away places like India or exotic locations just to find the physically-perfect father, this, in case the nearest club on a Friday night just won’t do.

?Gotcha? Pregnancies Soar with Women in Their Late ?30s - Softpedia

Edited January 10, 2015 by Robert Z

[No Limit]

BC pills are not without side effects taht can negatively affect a womanls health

 

"Can"? No, they DO, simple as that. It's no secret that pills raise the chance of heart attacks/cardiological issues.

[carhill]

I certainly don't identify with those guys who think girls intend to 'trap' them. We talked BC and I always provided my own condoms and never gave malicious intent a second thought with the women I had relationships with. Unsurprisingly, no surprise pregnancies, real or imagined. Save for my exW, all the women were mothers so proven fertile and varied in age from mid 30's to mid-40's.

 

I did hear a lot of this talk from young guys back when they were banging everything in sight and I was still a virgin but wrote it off to the dynamics of the typical young male. We operate in our own self-interest so of course if one is having a lot of sex one might become concerned about ramifications of those choices that are outside of one's control, like pregnancy and children. It's easier to point the finger than use the hand to zip up, a tried and true method of avoiding pregnancy. It's all about choice. Yep, some of the guys did become unwilling (in their mind) fathers. In reality though, their desire to copulate resulted in normal natural results, e.g. children. That's how life goes.

[autumnnight]

It happens quite often. Often times to varying extremes.

 

I knew a girl that had 4 babies with different men and put them all up for adoption once the man left her. Now that is extreme, but she had the children to keep the man around.

 

Also, a small percentage of men sleep with most of the women. These men are the type that women want to keep for themselves. What better way that to get pregnant?

 

Stats and research please...besides "I know this one woman"

[ktya]

What is it with guys worrying about a girl purposely getting pregnant? They always think a girl "lies" about being on birth control. I find that insulting. Do guys really think about this when they are dating a girl? I'm not understanding this, if they say that, does that mean they don't ever want kids?

 

Because it happens. Happened to me three times. Theyre on the shot, or have their tubes tied, or whatever the damned story. Your half wasted and roll with it. Three weeks later theyre coming at you with a positive test and your like WTF!?! Then they have the audacity to say they are against abortion on moral grounds and your like WTF?!?!??!?!!?!?

 

I dont know how women like that can live with themselves but trust me they do exist.

 

The women who are on BC and lie so you dont come inside them or to get you to wear a condom, thats a minor pet peeve but at least it doesnt come with life long implications.

[mario_C]

I'm sad that you won't go camping because of your fear of serial killers!

Well, you have fun. (OK, I'm more afraid of bugs in my sleeping bag. And dying of hypothermia, along with bug bites.)

Edited January 11, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Shining One]

We seem to have a mixture of reasons here. In some cases, the woman is trying to trap the man, in others, she just wants a baby. Unfortunately, the latter case often has the side effect of trapping the man financially. I'm fairly positive my case involved her just wanting a baby after she thought she was pregnant. She had a baby roughly a year after we broke up.

 

 

I'll search for this myself, but has anyone heard of a case of a man lying about a vasectomy, getting a woman pregnant, then suing her for child support? It's a highly unlikely scenario, but it would be insightful to see how it was handled from a legal standpoint.