What Do Men Really Think About Women Who Chase After A Man?

[autumnnight]

The men on here who will encourage you to chase men are the men who have had zero success with women. Those men want women to chase them because it takes all the pressure off them to compete with other men. In my experience, men who have anything to offer women like the chase, and while they may initially respond to a woman who does the chasing as an anomaly, in the end, they will leave you to chase a woman who isn't chasing them.

 

True, and they are also the ones who are usually blaming the women for every problem. So why would I chase someone like that?

[carhill]

The men on here who will encourage you to chase men are the men who have had zero success with women. Those men want women to chase them because it takes all the pressure off them to compete with other men. In my experience, men who have anything to offer women like the chase, and while they may initially respond to a woman who does the chasing as an anomaly, in the end, they will leave you to chase a woman who isn't chasing them.

 

In my generation, it is definitely more common for men to approach women, be persistent with women and chase women, for lack of a clearer term. In my case, that's what I've always done, mainly because it was the path to success and, like most men, I'm pragmatic. I may see women as equals but if equal action isn't working, then adapt and overcome.

 

However, the questions posed in the OP asked what I really think of women who 'chase' men, and the answer given was authentic; I see them as equals, equally healthy in their expression of attraction and 'like', and equally able to and successfully initiate and 'chase' if they so choose to. This isn't new and has been going on, in some form or another, far longer than I've been on the planet; it simply has remained as outlier to social norms, perhaps less so in recent times.

 

Personally, I've had LTR's and been married so whatever the milieu was, it worked out, regardless of whether or not my opinion about such matters was outlier or not. Other men have their own experiences; each is unique, the same as for women.

[MissBee]

Did you ask your guy friends, or did they give you reasons, why they don't like it when a woman initiates?

 

One of them claimed that in his experience every time a woman pursued him she ended up being crazy .

 

But they both said something along the lines of not liking the personality types of women who've pursued them and they preferred to do it.

[gaius]

I think it comes down to the fact that if a guy really wants you he's going to put in the effort to pursue you. So if you end up having to do it you're barking up the wrong tree.

 

I guess if your goal is to just get married and you'll settle for anything, including a man who can't summon up enough interest and courage to ask you out in the first place, then it might end up working out for you on rare occasion. But overall a bad idea from a woman's perspective. I can't say I hate it as a guy cause it's a nice ego boost on some level, but it never worked out for any of the women in my case.

[thefooloftheyear]

The men on here who will encourage you to chase men are the men who have had zero success with women. Those men want women to chase them because it takes all the pressure off them to compete with other men. In my experience, men who have anything to offer women like the chase, and while they may initially respond to a woman who does the chasing as an anomaly, in the end, they will leave you to chase a woman who isn't chasing them.

 

 

Sorry....you are totally wrong....partially, anyway...

 

I think some women get this impression that all guys walk around with half a hard on, just trolling for women 24/7...Some guys are just aloof or consumed in something else...Some guys are lousy at picking up signals from women...etc..

 

Anyway...IME

 

Guys that have lots of options many times dont chase....simply because they dont have to...Why hunt when its handed on a silver platter?? Makes no sense...

 

Ive often told single women that if they like a guy and wait for him to jump through hoops, you might be surprised when he doesnt....and then they potentially lose out..

 

No guy I know rebuffs female attention...If they arent their type, then they'll go cold....but to think all guys like or need the hunt and the dog and pony show is ridiculous...Some do while others dont play that game because they simply dont have to..

 

TFY

Edited January 7, 2015 by thefooloftheyear

[MissBee]

I think it comes down to the fact that if a guy really wants you he's going to put in the effort to pursue you. So if you end up having to do it you're barking up the wrong tree.

 

I guess if your goal is to just get married and you'll settle for anything, including a man who can't summon up enough interest and courage to ask you out in the first place, then it might end up working out for you on rare occasion. But overall a bad idea from a woman's perspective. I can't say I hate it as a guy cause it's a nice ego boost on some level, but it never worked out for any of the women in my case.

 

I think it also comes down to preferences in personality styles.

 

I mentioned my guy friends who didn't like it and I think for them the reason was that they felt a certain personality type of woman was the one who felt comfortable "chasing" and they didn't like that personality type. I didn't explore it in depth with them, except one said the women who chased him were crazy:rolleyes:.

 

But as I read your response I also thought about it and my personality preference is a man who is more dominant and such a man if he's interested won't mind reciprocating and following up if I make my interest known or approach me first, and that's the personality type I gel with best. A man too scared or shy or feels women should approach him and such is simply gonna be a personality type incompatible with mine. Doesn't mean however that some women might not like such a man.

[preraph]

I met nearly all the guys I've known by being the one initiating contact.

[Shining One]

The men on here who will encourage you to chase men are the men who have had zero success with women. Those men want women to chase them because it takes all the pressure off them to compete with other men. In my experience, men who have anything to offer women like the chase, and while they may initially respond to a woman who does the chasing as an anomaly, in the end, they will leave you to chase a woman who isn't chasing them.

Do you have any evidence backing up this claim? I've had success with women and I fully encourage women to pursue men. I've been in two long relationships that started with women pursuing me and neither ended with me chasing another woman.

 

 

Women approaching men makes logical sense. Generally speaking, women are more selective than men. It's more efficient for a woman to approach the smaller pool of men she finds attractive than for a man to approach the larger pool of women he find attractive.

[autumnnight]

Sorry....you are totally wrong....partially, anyway...

 

I think some women get this impression that all guys walk around with half a hard on, just trolling for women 24/7...Some guys are just aloof or consumed in something else...Some guys are lousy at picking up signals from women...etc..

 

Anyway...IME

 

Guys that have lots of options many times dont chase....simply because they dont have to...Why hunt when its handed on a silver platter?? Makes no sense...

 

Ive often told single women that if they like a guy and wait for him to jump through hoops, you might be surprised when he doesnt....and then they potentially lose out..

 

No guy I know rebuffs female attention...If they arent their type, then they'll go cold....but to think all guys like or need the hunt and the dog and pony show is ridiculous...Some do while others dont play that game because they simply dont have to..

 

TFY

 

I agree with what you are saying, but that is not what I am talking about. I am talking about the bittern and often awkward men who constantly whine about how women aren't giving them any and who expect a woman to do all the work. Or who assume that if a woman won't sleep with them then said woman must be a &$%@! and all women are likewise.

 

What you are talking about is confidence and options. What I am talking about is childish, whiny, butter, and a huge inability to look in the mirror.

[me85]

So you want people (guys) to literally just say one word (yay or nay)?

 

That would be a pretty boring and not very insightful thread don't you think, if people didn't explain themselves? There is a poll option though if you really do want to just break down answers into yes or no categories.

 

Point taken, you're right. I was just hoping to get more responses from men.

[A O]

What do men really think about a woman who chases a man? Who here has been chased by a woman and how did you feel about it? Some men say that men are the hunters...they are supposed to chase the woman, she isn't supposed to chase them. Opinions gentlemen?

Haven't come across any yet. Plenty of women though do put themselves in positions to be noticed however, that could be construed as a form of chasing perhaps.