bruce_lee Posted January 5, 2015 Posted January 5, 2015 Related thread: https://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/503573-girl-driving-me-insane So I recently started talking to a girl who was really into me in October. Wished her merry Xmas etc. and then the snapchats started coming, along with a little Facebook chit chat. So last weekend I was in a restaurant and sent her a snap of my meal as I knew she'd love it. She replied with "STOP THIS TORTURE", to which I said, "just give in and let me take you" (not really taking it seriously). She just replied with "yes", so later I asked her if she genuinely meant it, and she said she did. Now the restaurant is in my hometown, and (as of today) both of us are living a few hundred miles away from it, so it just isn't happening. Just my luck. I suggested that I find an alternative, but she keeps saying she wants to go to my hometown, and that it is the only option, with a haha tagged on. Now a few months ago, I could have thought of something witty to overcome this, but I am tapped out with her. Can't think of anything and I still doubt her interest. Her comments seem immature and it's pissed me off, but I would still take her out. Any help?
TabbyHearts Posted January 5, 2015 Posted January 5, 2015 are you living in the same city? Speak to her and say "it's a shame we can't go to X right now, but the next best thing is for me to take you to Y this Saturday at 8". If she hems and haws, or says she can't...then it's done and you move on. If she's only willing to go on a date with you to a specific place and no where else? WTF Let us know!
Author bruce_lee Posted January 5, 2015 Author Posted January 5, 2015 are you living in the same city? Speak to her and say "it's a shame we can't go to X right now, but the next best thing is for me to take you to Y this Saturday at 8". If she hems and haws, or says she can't...then it's done and you move on. If she's only willing to go on a date with you to a specific place and no where else? WTF Let us know! Yeah we live very close to eachother. I will do just that and report back. Cheers.
JChristie Posted January 5, 2015 Posted January 5, 2015 i am interested in what happens with this. it is possible she was just hinting around for a date. and will happily accept a local dinner date. it is possible she is wondering why you are taking so long to get together with her. however, if her "ways" are already starting to irritate you, that would be a warning light for me. maybe if you are more clear with her about how you feel (friend, potential girlfriend etc) your communications will improve. i am assuming that you are over 18. if under 18, then i recommend taking it slow and be friends first. ha ha, actually that is my advice for over 18's too! we all really want love and acceptance. sex is sometimes the only way we express caring, and that is crazy!
Author bruce_lee Posted January 5, 2015 Author Posted January 5, 2015 So I said this earlier: "Finally back in [name of city]. Feels good actually, despite having to leave my new favourite restaurant behind. It's a shame we can't go there right now, but I'd happily take you somewhere this weekend. Coincidentally, a friend recommended a Latin American restaurant a few weeks ago, if you fancy a taste of home (she's from Brazil). Anyway, I'm off to the gym. Let me know either way. No pressure." She messaged me "Haha sad. Where's that restaurant?" Told her where it was and what it was called. Then she said "Gym now. Yay. Sure lets go". She is **** at texting, despite being intelligent! So I guess it's a thumbs up for now. It only took me 3 months Thanks for the input. I'll update this thread if anyone is interested. Now I just need to not screw up! 1
TabbyHearts Posted January 6, 2015 Posted January 6, 2015 woohoo!! Now follow up with time to meet etc and let us know how it goes!!
mtber75 Posted January 7, 2015 Posted January 7, 2015 I had this same thing happen to me before. We would constantly be texting stupid silly stuff. So I you should let her know that you want to hang out with her. Texting is just to set times and dates not actual conversations.
Author bruce_lee Posted January 9, 2015 Author Posted January 9, 2015 Back again! So, after she said yes, I suggested we go this weekend, but she said that she has an exam (we are at university so a perfectly legit reason imo) the following Tuesday, so she isn't sure about the weekend. I said it wasn't a problem and that I'd leave the ball in her court. Wouldn't want to jeopardise her exam. Now we've had a few chats online since (one was a little flirty), but I haven't proposed a new date (don't want to pressure her). I saw her at the gym yesterday and wanted to ask her, but thought better of it. Kind of caught me off guard, and I didn't think the gym was the best venue for such a conversation, so we just had a brief "hi, how are you?" exchange, and I asked her about her workout etc., and left it at that so we could both carry on. I for one hate when my workout gets interrupted! Is it wise to leave asking her until after her exam, or shall I try and finalise it now, rather than wait any longer?
soph-walker Posted January 9, 2015 Posted January 9, 2015 Back again! So, after she said yes, I suggested we go this weekend, but she said that she has an exam (we are at university so a perfectly legit reason imo) the following Tuesday, so she isn't sure about the weekend. I said it wasn't a problem and that I'd leave the ball in her court. Wouldn't want to jeopardise her exam. Now we've had a few chats online since (one was a little flirty), but I haven't proposed a new date (don't want to pressure her). I saw her at the gym yesterday and wanted to ask her, but thought better of it. Kind of caught me off guard, and I didn't think the gym was the best venue for such a conversation, so we just had a brief "hi, how are you?" exchange, and I asked her about her workout etc., and left it at that so we could both carry on. I for one hate when my workout gets interrupted! Is it wise to leave asking her until after her exam, or shall I try and finalise it now, rather than wait any longer? Re your gym meet, I'd have been tempted to ask there and then to see the reaction, whether or not she'd make some excuse or be up for it, you'd instantly have your answer on whether or not you should spend anymore time on it. Maybe leave it a couple of days and then text her straight up and say something short like 'Hey...(name of restaurant)- how about it?' And see how she responds? I think the shorter the text the better, it seems more casual to me, I don't know what anyone else's thoughts are on this?
Author bruce_lee Posted January 15, 2015 Author Posted January 15, 2015 So we still haven't settled on a date, yet she still seems interested. It's clear that she is having second thoughts, and can't bring herself to be upfront about it, but I don't want to ask her a third time and come across as desperate. We last communicated on Saturday evening, which was the second time I asked her to pick a day. It's possible that she's had a busy week as it is exam season, but I've had about enough, and don't want to invest any more of myself into her. It should not have taken this long to arrange, and I just want her to say exactly what she is thinking. It would make my life so much easier. I never mess people around like this. Maybe I'm just too nice. I have been hoping to see her in the gym, but it hasn't happened. How can I ask her about this without seeming desperate or confrontational?
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