Has anyone reconciled with their spouse AFTER divorce?

[SparklingandBroken]

I know a few people who have, and one of my good friends just started dating her ex-husband.

 

My divorce is supposed to be final in exactly one month. We've been separated since March 2014. Last night I get all these texts from ex about how he loves me, misses me, and wants me to reconsider. He was admitting and apologizing for being a "****ty husband ".

 

I don't know what to think...95% of me is confident with my decision, but there's that 5% that makes me wonder if someone could really change. I do still love him, but I think things have gotten way too complicated for it to ever work.

 

Anyway, I'm just curious about everyone else's stories.

[DKT3]

We are. I won't go into all the details because its posted here (my wife posts here also). We had multiple issues on both sides. She never wanted to get divorced. 5 years apart mostly because my ego would allow me to forgive her. We are happy now, the relationship is better then ever because you BOTH understand what we did that lead to divorce and have worked very hard to fix those issues.

 

I don't believe in the sentiment that love isn't enough. Its enough if its love on both sides.

[amaysngrace]

I know of one couple that got married, divorced and then married each other again.

 

Their kids are all kinds of screwed up.

[redtail]

There is no flippin' way I'd ever have gone back to my ex, erase that 5% of doubt. Reconciliation for me meant her and I do not have animosity towards each other and that's good enough for me.

[SparklingandBroken]

I don't know if it's a head game or if he's being sincere. I think his crazy mother REALLY messed him and his siblings up. Our issues involved lies and varying levels of cheating throughout the years, with me having cancer mixed in.

 

If our issues were simpler without the betrayal, I could see it working. But I feel like too much damage has been done. I still plan to go forward with the divorce. He should have made these realizations months ago before piling more layers of BS onto our already complicated situation.

[redtail]

I don't know if it's a head game...

 

Yes, if you think it is, it is. Sounds like too much water under the bridge, burn it and move on. Many times a partner will have second thoughts but to me, a divorce is like taking off a bandage, do it quickly and decisively.

[Poppygoodwill]

I've never gotten back with an ex so I can't help with that. But when I'm doubting a choice I've made, I remind myself that I didn't get to the critical moment ( in your case, signing the divorce papers) by accident or a spur of the moment decision. It was the result of many many moments of consideration and many decisions along teh way that lead me to that place.

 

You should have faith that you wouldn't make the wrong decision all those times.

 

Also the other thing to think about: what more, or new, information could you get that would change your mind?

 

Chances are you have examined every angle of it, and that you and he have tried to work through the issues and that you've gotten to this point because there is no more new information that could save the situation.

[SJS]

Someone in my family remarried her ex-husband several years after their divorce. They divorced a short time later. That's the only time I've ever heard of a couple remarrying.

[Jswscents]

I divorced my husband and moved to another state for 5 years. We reunited when our middle child started acting out. We remarried and he is a better man than the first time we were married. I laid down my rules as he did his and we are closer than ever.

[ralfgarnett]

Liz Taylor & Richard Burton were married and divorced 3 times each I think, but they were Hollywood mega stars though and could easily afford it.

[Otter2569]

Not me! That ship has sailed and I have never looked back. In hind sight I wonder why we didnt divorce sooner. Honestly my experiences being single so far outweigh the good times being married.

 

My ex and I are still actually good friends and talk about all kinds of things but I have no sexual interest in her what so ever and I would never going back.