feelinbetter Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 So a year ago my band played an opening slot at the local live music venue. After the show I ended up talking to a girl who introduced herself. It was dark outside so I didn't recognize her as the girl I'd been admiring earlier in the night after we'd played. I was stoned at the time so of course I forgot to get her number. I did get her name so I found her on Facebook the next day (this is where I recognized her from earlier in the night) and started kicking myself for the missed opportunity. I didn't add her since I was hoping to run into her again at another show. I went to a few other local shows that Facebook said she was attending - not with the express purpose of meeting her since they were mutually interesting shows, but I was hoping to run into her again. Unfortunately I didn't see her there. I haven't seen her since the show we played a year ago and as a New Year Resolution I am planning to take the initiative and make more things happen for myself. So my question is this: I've never used Facebook to meet girls but since it's the only way I have to contact her should I add her and reintroduce myself? If she asks how I know her should I just be straight up and say we met after a show and I was hoping to run into her last year? I doubt she remembers me from our brief encounter but you never know... My confidence isn't exactly sky-high right now so I tend to overthink things but I'm determined to do something about it. I'd just like a few second opinions. Thanks
Erised Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 It would have been a lot less weird a year ago. Do you have any mutual friends or anyway that would be reasonable that you saw her photo and remembered her from meeting a year ago? Saying you hoped to run into her for the last year and then looked her up on Facebook would seem a little creepy. 2
acrosstheuniverse Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 I agree it would have been better a year ago but... if it's the only way of getting in touch, go for it. Just say something like 'hey you just popped up on my 'people you may know'... I think I recognise you, did you go to *event* last year by any chance?' and see if she responds. No need to overthink this one. If I liked a guy I'd just be pleased he found any way to get in contact with me. Although I might wonder why he wasn't interested for the entirety of the past year... 2
Author feelinbetter Posted January 4, 2015 Author Posted January 4, 2015 (edited) Cool, thanks for the input. I realize it's been a long while which is why I wasn't too sure on what to do. I figured it would be better to meet again in person so I hoped that would happen. Just so you know, I wasn't waiting an entire year pinning all my hopes on this one girl... A: I haven't had many in my life thus far which means going without is no big deal for me. B: I was involved with another girl for a couple of months back in the summer which didn't develop into anything further. Like I said, I just want to make up for any missed opportunities I may have had. She's pretty and seems cool and down-to-earth which I like. She remains the only person I've met with her name, do you think I should mention that as the way I recognized her on my 'people you may know' feed? Maybe I could ask if it's her from *event*? Thanks ERISED: There are a few mutual Facebook friends. They are people I know in person professionally/accquaintances. It would have been a lot less weird a year ago. Do you have any mutual friends or anyway that would be reasonable that you saw her photo and remembered her from meeting a year ago? Saying you hoped to run into her for the last year and then looked her up on Facebook would seem a little creepy. I agree it would have been better a year ago but... if it's the only way of getting in touch, go for it. Just say something like 'hey you just popped up on my 'people you may know'... I think I recognise you, did you go to *event* last year by any chance?' and see if she responds. No need to overthink this one. If I liked a guy I'd just be pleased he found any way to get in contact with me. Although I might wonder why he wasn't interested for the entirety of the past year... Edited January 4, 2015 by feelinbetter
preraph Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 Add her and at the same time send her a message saying, I'm ____ with (band name). I remember you from one of our gigs and thought you seemed cool. Would love to have a chance to talk. Then see what she does. I bet she responds favorably. Then if she writes something back that sounds favorable, just say, Hey, want to go get lunch sometime soon? Then she'll let you know if she's single now or not. Or invite her to another gig if you have one coming up. 2
d0nnivain Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 Age is a factor. The older your are, the weirder & less effective this will be. If FB is your only point of connection what other choice do you have? Just realize given the passage of time, she may say no because she doesn't remember who you are or because she now has a BF.
Satu Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 I hope you don't have to wait a year for an answer. 2
Author feelinbetter Posted January 6, 2015 Author Posted January 6, 2015 I hope you don't have to wait a year for an answer. Haha, well I've had no response (2 days) so far so we'll see! At least I have my answer now
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