zip111 Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 It's been almost a year since a devastating breakup with someone I was in love with. I have never felt that way about anyone before. I have recently seen him, he was at a party I was at and that hurt. He's trying to get with a girl that I actually hate, so that's nice. I'm really depressed about seeing him this past weekend, it really triggered some past feelings and hurt. I feel dead inside. I don't think I can ever feel that happy again when I was with him.
dyna85 Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 A year isn't that long when you're trying to recover from a broken heart, so your feelings are normal. Just know that you will feel as happy again, if not happier. It only seems you won't because you're still in recovery mode and not yet healed, but you will get there. I experienced similar sentiments after my first major breakup (I never thought I'd get over it either, but I've since moved on and realize it was for the absolute best). Also, everything happens for a reason, and it if were meant to be, you'd be together, so obviously the universe has something better planned for you. When the powers at be separate you from something or someone, despite your best efforts to keep it together, there's a reason for it and it's for your greatest good. The pain that results from things not turning out as planned of course sucks but it paves the way for you to become stronger in the long run and available to opportunities that better suit you.
Author zip111 Posted January 4, 2015 Author Posted January 4, 2015 A year isn't that long when you're trying to recover from a broken heart, so your feelings are normal. Just know that you will feel as happy again, if not happier. It only seems you won't because you're still in recovery mode and not yet healed, but you will get there. I experienced similar sentiments after my first major breakup (I never thought I'd get over it either, but I've since moved on and realize it was for the absolute best). Also, everything happens for a reason, and it if were meant to be, you'd be together, so obviously the universe has something better planned for you. When the powers at be separate you from something or someone, despite your best efforts to keep it together, there's a reason for it and it's for your greatest good. The pain that results from things not turning out as planned of course sucks but it paves the way for you to become stronger in the long run and available to opportunities that better suit you. I think this is what I needed to hear. Thank you so much.. made me cry. I sure do hope that someday I'll forget about this once and for all
Josmatjes Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 A year isn't that long when you're trying to recover from a broken heart, so your feelings are normal. Just know that you will feel as happy again, if not happier. It only seems you won't because you're still in recovery mode and not yet healed, but you will get there. I experienced similar sentiments after my first major breakup (I never thought I'd get over it either, but I've since moved on and realize it was for the absolute best). Also, everything happens for a reason, and it if were meant to be, you'd be together, so obviously the universe has something better planned for you. When the powers at be separate you from something or someone, despite your best efforts to keep it together, there's a reason for it and it's for your greatest good. The pain that results from things not turning out as planned of course sucks but it paves the way for you to become stronger in the long run and available to opportunities that better suit you. I agree... When one door closes another opens..... Also I truly believe that we are where we are meant to be..you are someone else's dream....trust me... 1
dyna85 Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 Zip.. I hope you are okay. I know it's hard. Trust me, been there. I don't think you will ever forget, but you will move on, as painful as that is to even think about. I second what Josmatjes said. I think breakups are not for the faint of heart, but they make us who we become, which is stronger, and more experienced in love. You will be okay. God doesn't give you anything you can't handle. Hugs to you... 1
Author zip111 Posted January 4, 2015 Author Posted January 4, 2015 Zip.. I hope you are okay. I know it's hard. Trust me, been there. I don't think you will ever forget, but you will move on, as painful as that is to even think about. I second what Josmatjes said. I think breakups are not for the faint of heart, but they make us who we become, which is stronger, and more experienced in love. You will be okay. God doesn't give you anything you can't handle. Hugs to you... Thank you.. hard to believe I'll find someone better. It almost feels like back to 1 month after the breakup rather than 1 year.. I havent wanted to get out of bed for days. Hopefully someday I will stop feeling so empty 1
dyna85 Posted January 4, 2015 Posted January 4, 2015 Zip... your feelings are totally natural after seeing him. Setbacks are part of the process, unfortunately, and obviously fate has a reason for having put you in the same space as he recently, after such a long period of nc. Don't feel bad about feeling low. Your feelings make perfect sense. It's okay to be upset. I wish there were a magic wand to cure these ridiculously painful feelings. I really do. Just keep pressing on, day by day. I know it's hard and I'm sorry you're in pain. I truly believe this crap serves a purpose. Like it breaks you down to bring you back stronger. However, I know these stupid cliches don't ease the pain when you're on your own out there trying to make it and the feelings keep flooding in, despite your best efforts. It sucks when you're just going about your daily life and you have to actually deal with the feelings. Easier said than done. (I find coming on Love Shack often is a bit of a coping mechanism of mine and kinda numbs the pain a bit... probably not the best idea, but oh well...) I can only speak from experience when I tell you that getting over my first love was HELL on earth. Seriously, I was devastated like you and it took me seemingly forever to get over him and I felt just like you. I thought, there is just no way I will ever be over him. I would go online and search for answers to 'will I ever get over him' 'does one ever get over their first love' and I would see comments about people claiming to get over their past love, and I would scoff at these posts, like 'they don't understand.. it's never gonna happen.' I felt like you, dead inside... unable to carry on... weeping at the thought of it all... disbelieving that I might ever get over it and move on without him. I seriously thought there was no freaking way. That I was the exception, not the rule. Well honey, lemme tell ya... unless it's absolutely meant to be that you and he end up together, you're the rule and you will move on eventually and feel at peace with the outcome. In the meantime, stay strong and keep going. We got your back girl if you need support. I know it hurts. : \ 2
Author zip111 Posted January 5, 2015 Author Posted January 5, 2015 Zip... your feelings are totally natural after seeing him. Setbacks are part of the process, unfortunately, and obviously fate has a reason for having put you in the same space as he recently, after such a long period of nc. Don't feel bad about feeling low. Your feelings make perfect sense. It's okay to be upset. I wish there were a magic wand to cure these ridiculously painful feelings. I really do. Just keep pressing on, day by day. I know it's hard and I'm sorry you're in pain. I truly believe this crap serves a purpose. Like it breaks you down to bring you back stronger. However, I know these stupid cliches don't ease the pain when you're on your own out there trying to make it and the feelings keep flooding in, despite your best efforts. It sucks when you're just going about your daily life and you have to actually deal with the feelings. Easier said than done. (I find coming on Love Shack often is a bit of a coping mechanism of mine and kinda numbs the pain a bit... probably not the best idea, but oh well...) I can only speak from experience when I tell you that getting over my first love was HELL on earth. Seriously, I was devastated like you and it took me seemingly forever to get over him and I felt just like you. I thought, there is just no way I will ever be over him. I would go online and search for answers to 'will I ever get over him' 'does one ever get over their first love' and I would see comments about people claiming to get over their past love, and I would scoff at these posts, like 'they don't understand.. it's never gonna happen.' I felt like you, dead inside... unable to carry on... weeping at the thought of it all... disbelieving that I might ever get over it and move on without him. I seriously thought there was no freaking way. That I was the exception, not the rule. Well honey, lemme tell ya... unless it's absolutely meant to be that you and he end up together, you're the rule and you will move on eventually and feel at peace with the outcome. In the meantime, stay strong and keep going. We got your back girl if you need support. I know it hurts. : \ Thank you. This helped. It hurts so bad I wake up in the middle of the night now. It's almost as if I'm back to when we first broke up with me. Everything runs through my mind at once. I wish it was easy to just forget. This is so hard and I don't want to feel like this anymore. It's killing me
dyna85 Posted January 5, 2015 Posted January 5, 2015 Well if it's any consolation... I feel the EXACT same way, only it's not a first love. Getting no sleep and feeling like hell all day every day bc I was dropped like a bad habit by this guy who I thought was real. Turns out he is an a-hole. This is no way to live and I'd rather just die right now. Going to work today is going to be such fun. Breathing is painful. I woke up this morning and this quote came to mind as I was getting ready for work -- 'pain demands to be felt.' Sucks. Really does.
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