JCG Posted January 2, 2015 Posted January 2, 2015 So, I posted my story a while back without much feedback except for one member <3. I wanted to give an update since my 6 weeks of NC. I went no contact on November 10th. He contacted me 2 weeks later, to which I did not reply. I figured, that was it. I felt empowered and wonderful! So one month later, on Christmas Day, he contacted me. Uggghhhh. It was not a mass "Merry Christmas" text, as it was personalized. I struggled a lot for a few hours with whether or not I respond. Under any other circumstance, again, I would not replied. But, it was Christmas, and I didn't want to seem mean. So, I was polite and brief. "Thank you, hoping you have a great holiday as well, and a Happy New Year"...done! I threw in HNY in hopes that would cover all holiday time and he wouldn't feel the need to further contact. Kind of like a closer? Nope!! He contacted me again at midnight on NYE. Ugggghhh. So, I said HNY and left it as that. He sent another message, to which I did not reply. It's like he used the holiday as an excuse to contact. I don't get it. Any thoughts? I am back in NC, but any idea what his point is?? I'm kind of surprised he didn't delete my #. I did, his.
coolheadal Posted January 2, 2015 Posted January 2, 2015 (edited) On your phone why don't you block his number which would block his text. On the PC block him also. Why put yourself in all this panic over your EX. He clearly now feels he can control you by making you answer his text. See NG = Never Give In. Got to keep the NC = no contact or no communication active always. He's your EX for a reason so remember that. He won't change and he knows how to control you since he knows all about you. Got be strong. Your not being mean not to answer his text. Your being in charge in control of your life not him doing that to you. Holiday's are gone now and when it's your birthday don't even think to let him back in to that. Best you move on and find a nice guy to love you and make your life more happier! Edited January 2, 2015 by coolheadal 1
RedButton Posted January 2, 2015 Posted January 2, 2015 You gotta do what's right by you, if you felt the need to respond then so be it. You also were strong enough to draw the line and not keep going with it otherwise. I think he's trying to get in contact with you, I don't know why. You should take as much time as you need to get better though. 1
FancyFace Posted January 2, 2015 Posted January 2, 2015 OK I assume that he broke up with you right? If so, who cares about being mean or being percieved as childish or other rubbish excuses that people use to stay in contact. If you are serious about NC, then you would block him on every communication avenue available and stay NC. Even if he kept your number and messaged you, it means nothing in the grander scheme of things. It's just a text message, nothing to get excited about. It's breadcrumbs, chicken feed of communication. He probably got a huge ego boost with you responding, in his mind, you are eating out of the palm of his hand and he knows he has you in his back pocket for a rainy day. Cut contact, block, ignore and start the process of moving on. 1
Omei Posted January 2, 2015 Posted January 2, 2015 You yourself also used Christmas and NYE as an excuse to contact on your behalf. You lost progress doing that Of course he's going keep contacting after you responded what did you think would happen? you opened the door of contact again. It's silly to think his contact would stop after that. You don't seem serious about NC
Marco Valerio Posted January 2, 2015 Posted January 2, 2015 Hi!!! He's just trying to keep the lines open. Do not answer anymore more messages if you want to continue with NC. Best regards. 1
Author JCG Posted January 3, 2015 Author Posted January 3, 2015 I have a blackberry and I've googled how to block and you can't. I understand that you can on iPhone. If someone knows a way, please let me know. And yes I am serious about NC, I haven't initiated once, nor do I want to. You are right though, I should have not reciprocated the MC/ HNY text. I guess it was just the nostalgia of the holiday. It was pretty much a mutual break. Ok, I just needed some input and some strength from the forum. Thank you all! You rock!
coolheadal Posted January 3, 2015 Posted January 3, 2015 I have a blackberry and I've googled how to block and you can't. I understand that you can on iPhone. If someone knows a way, please let me know. And yes I am serious about NC, I haven't initiated once, nor do I want to. You are right though, I should have not reciprocated the MC/ HNY text. I guess it was just the nostalgia of the holiday. It was pretty much a mutual break. Ok, I just needed some input and some strength from the forum. Thank you all! You rock! Your Service Provider can help you with your blackberry to block calls. I find this below, it might help out? If not whoever you pay service with will help more with block listings. This you need to do A-SAP! Blackberry's basic Block List. Go to menu and choose the Contacts option. In the contacts select the numbers you want to block. If you want to block an unknown number which you haven't saved in contacts then go to Recent contacts and select those numbers, whom you want to block. Confirm the block and save the contacts in your Block List by clicking save in the menu. To go to the block list click the menu on your Blackberry. From menu choose address book and click the Menu button option in it. In the Menu choose Manage Numbers and then scroll for the Blacklist. Hurray! You just blocked some unwanted guests on your Blackberry.
Author JCG Posted January 3, 2015 Author Posted January 3, 2015 Thanks for that, but that's all that I can find online as well. Unfortunately, I don't have a menu button on my Q10. The older BB's had menu buttons. I've scrolled thru everything in my settings to figure this out. I guess my next step is calling Bell.
BC1980 Posted January 3, 2015 Posted January 3, 2015 He's just contacting you to see of you are still around to give him an ego fix. Nothing more, nothing less. Christmas is no reason to contact. You need to protect yourself and stop further contact. 1
Author JCG Posted January 3, 2015 Author Posted January 3, 2015 You're right!! I know. I guess I'm one of those ppl who see sincerity in others. I know what the intentions were behind the contact. I won't cater to any more ego boosts! He needs to move on! I have!! He probably wanted to implant himself into my thoughts again, as I haven't contacted him in 6 weeks. Maybe wanted to see if I was seeing anyone else, where I was at. I didn't offer any info about my current situation. I kept it polite and brief. Now it's time to pull back the reigns! I'm in complete control! 1
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