Lunara Posted December 30, 2014 Posted December 30, 2014 So I've been with my current boyfriend for about a year now. Originally, he was with another girl for three years before me but their relationship was completely long distance and they were having some issues I guess; they had never even met in person. He eventually left her to be with me and cut contact with her completely. A few months after I had been with him he tells me that he texted her and that he wants to break up because he misses his ex and wants to be with her again, but not even a day later he messages me and tells me he made a mistake, asking me to take him back. Things are fine for about five-six months, but I always knew he still had feelings for his ex deep down so I eventually broke up with him because he told me at some point that he didn't know what he wanted anymore. After that happened I had removed him from all my contact lists but about five days later he messages me and begs me to take him back because he doesn't want to be with his ex. I took him back again because I love him, but I know hes been texting his ex almost every day since I've been around him and I'm just not sure what to do at this point. After all that has happened him talking to his ex every day bother me a ton and I feel like it's destroying our relationship but he says he only loves her as a friend, that's all. I was hoping I could get some insight from you guys. Thanks!
d0nnivain Posted December 30, 2014 Posted December 30, 2014 If he wants to dump you for someone he has never met, let him go. The man has a warped sense of priorities & needs a reality check. 5
mortensorchid Posted December 30, 2014 Posted December 30, 2014 Tell that a****** to tell his story walking. He's a wishy washy loser. He starts things, builds them up, promises things, then he either abandons it or destroys it. Is this how you want to live? I hope the answer is no. 1
Diezel Posted December 30, 2014 Posted December 30, 2014 If he were your ex-boyfriend and you'd actually stick to that idea, you wouldn't have this problem. 1
Author Lunara Posted December 30, 2014 Author Posted December 30, 2014 I broke up with him. I sent him a message on Skype because we had already broken up before in the past and didn't feel like going through that again. I just left him a message and then removed him from everything. The issue now is that I feel extremely depressed because I honestly loved him with all my heart. I'm having trouble falling asleep. Any tips on how to get to sleep after something like this?
Satu Posted December 30, 2014 Posted December 30, 2014 Here are a few tips that I wrote a while ago: 1. You're still in the crisis phase - you are very hurt, disappointed, and probably angry, but the intensity of your feelings will reduce. 2. Don't suppress your feelings, or tell yourself that you shouldn't be feeling what you're feeling - that never helps. 3. Externalise your feelings by writing them down, talking to a trustworthy person, or using any other mode of expression that feels right. 4. Remind yourself frequently that you can and will have a good life without this person. 5. Tell yourself that you can and will love again. 6. Take care of your body: Eat enough and eat healthily. Drink enough water. Get a bit more rest than you think you need. Do some easy exercise - nothing too strenuous. If you feel physically unwell go to see your doctor. 7. Do not allow yourself to become socially isolated or withdrawn. 8. Establish Total No Contact with your ex. No contact directly, indirectly, or by social media. Its not easy, but it helps. 9. Keep up with all your responsibilities and things you have to do. 10. Do not use alcohol or drugs in an attempt to self-medicate. 11. Post here as often as you want to. People here want to help. 1
Quest Posted December 30, 2014 Posted December 30, 2014 The issue now is that I feel extremely depressed because I honestly loved him with all my heart. I'm having trouble falling asleep. Any tips on how to get to sleep after something like this? Get something over the counter (Nytol/Simply Sleep) that's non-addictive or go to a herbal place and ask them for something. And/or, if it's a major, on-going problem discuss it with your doctor and see what they suggest. Get as much fresh air and exercise as you can during the day whatever. Sorry you're going through this ... had the same trouble after a break-up but it gradually got better without any meds. 1
Author Lunara Posted December 30, 2014 Author Posted December 30, 2014 Thank you for all the help you guys have given me. I really do appreciate it. I'm going to need all the help I can get for the next through months. Hopefully I get through it smoothly. 1
Author Lunara Posted January 1, 2015 Author Posted January 1, 2015 So... problem. My ex has been spamming me with phone calls/texts and stuff. I've already removed him from everything, but he refuses to just let me be. He says he wants me to take him back and apologized for how he was acting and stuff. What do I do? It's really bothering the crap out of me.
CALOVELY Posted January 1, 2015 Posted January 1, 2015 So... problem. My ex has been spamming me with phone calls/texts and stuff. I've already removed him from everything, but he refuses to just let me be. He says he wants me to take him back and apologized for how he was acting and stuff. What do I do? It's really bothering the crap out of me. If you have blocked him from everything, how is he getting through? I would continue to ignore him. 1
FitChick Posted January 1, 2015 Posted January 1, 2015 Tell him to go cry on his fantasy girlfriend's shoulder. 3
Satu Posted January 1, 2015 Posted January 1, 2015 What do I do? It's really bothering the crap out of me. Ignore him as if your life depends on it. There are many people out there who will treat you much better. Let his head slip beneath the waves, Lol. Always go forward. Never go back. Go forward to something better.
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