People who are always broke..,

[Cocochai]

Do you believe they should be dating or focus on getting involved their finances together??

 

This goes more so for Men but woman as well?

[aggie382]

If they happen to meet someone naturally through friends or work or something, I don't see a problem with them exploring their interest. But I don't think they should be our there actively seeking dates like on Match or something.

[Dontfindme]

Freaking focus on finances, and stability <--- This is me talking to myself. -____-

[me85]

One of the reasons I choose to remain single is because of my financial situation. When I'm finished paying off debts and loans I'll be a much happier person.

[WonderWoman911]

People who are always broke should be focused on getting their financially priorities straight. Figuring out ways to make money,saving,etc. "Dating" someone comes along with expenses.So if that individual is broke, he/she can't take the other person out or simply take care of anything that's needed.

[toscaroscura]

Do you believe they should be dating or focus on getting involved their finances together??

 

This goes more so for Men but woman as well?

 

Two men I dated come to mind:

 

One was so broke and about to lose his house. He was depressed and hung up on his ex wife even though it had been two years. He blamed her for all of his troubles. We barely went out and I paid when we did.

 

Another complained constantly about the cost of dating and being broke (and I am laid back and more than willing to pay for myself). When I suggested a restaurant for a date (and mind you, he told me to pick and said money wasn't an issue as he had just gotten paid), he rejected it for being too expensive, and he ended up picking another place. Which was fine. But then on the date he showed me the $100+ sneakers he had just bought that day.

 

Neither lasted long at all. Now, I see someone who is constantly broke or complaining that he is a big turn off. I support myself and live a modest life, but I don't complain about it. It speaks to a negative mindset.

 

*These men were late 30s early 40s. Not kids.

[JuneJulySeptember]

I think it depends what else you have in terms of 'sexual/dating' value as it's called.

 

I know men who are broke and even criminals can get women because I watch COPS a lot and a lot of those guys have women, even really good looking ones sometimes.

 

And of course, it goes without saying, those women aren't doing too great themselves likely.

 

As for myself, I can't imagine being able to get any kind of woman whatsoever if I didn't at least make enough to live on my own, afford a car, etc, etc.

[Trenton100]

Being financially stable in 2014 without money issues is so easy to do.

 

Really.

[preraph]

Listen, there are a lot of people these days who live paycheck to paycheck, and I'm now one of them, and it isn't for lack of working hard. I wouldn't be able to find time to date, so in that way, I'd say it's impractical. But I see nothing wrong with broke young people finding some happiness. You don't have to have money to be happy. One of the happiest times and favorite jobs in my life was the one where I made the very least money, but I was doing something I loved with people I loved.

 

All you should really judge about there is if the person is trying or if they're just looking for excuses not to try. No one should get involved with someone who simply doesn't want to do anything with their life. It can't possibly lead to happiness. So momma's boys still living at home mooching off their parents at 30, no. Drug addicts shoving it all up their arm, no. People who think they're too good to take a menial job so they remain out of work, no. People who are always broke but always have enough money for cigarettes or beer or videogames, no.

 

Person who has two crap jobs and tries to live within his/her means, yes. I've had two jobs a lot of my life and I get really tired of hearing even some of my friends complain about money when they will not even consider getting another part-time job.

[Cocochai]

People who are always broke should be focused on getting their financially priorities straight. Figuring out ways to make money,saving,etc. "Dating" someone comes along with expenses.So if that individual is broke, he/she can't take the other person out or simply take care of anything that's needed.

 

I agree but at the end of the day they won't have any problems trying to woo you in bed also. I believe if you can't be there for someone financially and vise versus.... You shouldn't be trying to date and get in someone's pants either.

[WonderWoman911]

I agree but at the end of the day they won't have any problems trying to woo you in bed also. I believe if you can't be there for someone financially and vise versus.... You shouldn't be trying to date and get in someone's pants either.

 

That's true, but hopefully you won't equate his finances as being the determining factor of if you have sex or not. Because if that's the case, it's like you're selling your body.

[MissBee]

Do you believe they should be dating or focus on getting involved their finances together??

 

This goes more so for Men but woman as well?

 

If you happen to meet someone it's one thing but if you are truly broke or out of work then signing up for OLD or actively pursuing finding someone is mixing up your priorities in my mind.

 

Certainly for me if I am struggling financially I'm not going to prioritize dating but getting my situation to a comfortable place.

[truth_seeker]

Do you believe they should be dating or focus on getting involved their finances together??

 

This goes more so for Men but woman as well?

 

Usually, people who are broke, and are looking to date, they're looking for a sap to provide for them.

 

Hence, gold diggers, moochers

[toscaroscura]

I think it depends what else you have in terms of 'sexual/dating' value as it's called.

 

I know men who are broke and even criminals can get women because I watch COPS a lot and a lot of those guys have women, even really good looking ones sometimes.

 

And of course, it goes without saying, those women aren't doing too great themselves likely.

 

As for myself, I can't imagine being able to get any kind of woman whatsoever if I didn't at least make enough to live on my own, afford a car, etc, etc.

 

But those women are also "low value", no matter how they look. It's not "Geez these guys are getting women despite being financially low value, they must have high sexual/dating value!" No. Low value is attracting low value.

 

Unless all you care about is looks.

[Phoe]

By most people's standards, I'm broke. I don't make much money. After paying my bills and necessities, I typically have about $50 left, which usually gets saved. I don't buy many things. I'm a bit of a minimalist and live simply, not buying things I don't need.

 

 

So, despite having only $50 left at the end of a month, I don't struggle. I get by just fine. I simply don't have extra money left to do random things with. Which is fine, really.

 

 

So even though most people would consider me "broke", I don't struggle, get by perfectly fine, have great credit, and no debt, and am very financially responsible.

 

 

Because of this, I don't think the number of dollars I'm bringing home every day should dictate whether I should or should not date. Bettering myself is ALWAYS something I'm working towards, so "focusing on that" is irrelevant. If I were to date someone it would not stop me from working on that promotion and raise, it wouldn't stop me from pursuing my masters.

 

 

My money is just plain not relevant to dating. Nor is the money a man makes relevant in dating me. As long as he pays his own bills and doesn't involve me in his finances, I'm happy. Too many times I was the one giving away the last dollars I had to a man who wasn't being responsible with his finances. I won't do that again!

[sillyanswer]

Do you believe they should be dating or focus on getting involved their finances together??

 

This goes more so for Men but woman as well?

 

I don't think that being broke, or poor, should preclude anyone from dating. Of course it may be in their interests to also be working on improving their finances.

 

I also don't think there's anything wrong with someone else choosing to not date someone because of their financial status, income level, job status, earning potential etc.

[Cocochai]

That's true, but hopefully you won't equate his finances as being the determining factor of if you have sex or not. Because if that's the case, it's like you're selling your body.

 

Lol I'm not talking about giving you $$ In exchange for sex. I'm talking about always wanting to "chill" over at your dates house watching movies and expecting to get sum and call that a date. All the time.

 

If that person can't at least take you out to see even a $5.00 movie but expecting something from you in the end.. I wouldn't date that person.

[autumnnight]

It depends on what broke means I guess. To me broke means someone cannot even make their basic necessity expenses. Speaking for myself, if I cannot pay my bills and take care of my kids, then I have no business spending some of that needed money on a date. I would think the same for a man. If a single father can't buy shoes or groceries for his kids, he sure doesn't need to be forking out an Eharmony subscription. That's just irresponsible.

 

If someone is barely making it, then if they and their chosen partner can find a way to make it mutually work, then go for it. But necessities come first.

[contact1]

I haven't read all the posts but I don't feel that money should factor in if you should date someone or not. We all have different stages in our life financially and to let just that one aspect alone dictate whether you should interact with the opposite (or same if that is your thing ) sex is a bit foolish. The bigger key is what are you doing financially as your goal.

 

Imagine if you were starting up a business, it takes a lot of time and money to get a business going and you may not be making much. But why should that stop you from going out on a date and meeting people. You are in the middle of doing something that could take off, you have ambition, a goal, a direction in your life that could lead to something great. That's something to be admired if you ask me.

 

And honestly, dates do not have to be expensive at all. There are so many things you can do that have such a low cost, it boggles me sometimes that the usual go to assumption is that a date is always a 100 dollar plus meal. Low on cash? Plan a picnic with food you made, a bottle of wine, and some location with a great ocean view or low lights where you can see the stars. Bit into active stuff? Do a nature hike or go biking. Enjoy cooking? Take a group cooking class. You get the idea, I hope

[nofeelings22]

I really don't care if my partner is broke. I don't mind sharing. Who they are a a person is what matters.

[Maleficent]

It's a tough one to answer. It depends what you mean by financial problems but to be honest, everyone has debt today. It's almost impossible to avoid it nowadays.

I know there are some people here who are going to come in and say they have been debt free for X number of years but it's just not the majority of people.

 

People finish school in debt, they buy a car (more debt) and then a house (more debt).

So if you consider 'having debt' the same as having financial problems, well, welcome to the world.

 

As far as dating, I don't see how having debt or being a little tight monetary should be an issue.

It can take months - even years - for two people to finally combine their budgets together so I don't get the whole 'being responsible for your partner's budget' argument...

 

Also, most people will be in financial trouble at some point in their lives - probably more than once.

[Woggle]

I dated when I was broke and it is not hard to get dates.

[Danda]

I don't think it's wrong to date while broke but it sure is more difficult. You basically have to be able to genuinely enjoy each other's company, because there won't be a whole lot you can do otherwise. I kind of like that, though. Like the idea of just grabbing cheap coffee and going for a walk in a nice place for a first date. But problem is that if the other person makes way more money, then they will want to do stuff that you can't afford. Which either means that you are always holding them back, or they have to pay your way much of the time. Both scenarios make for rather uncomfortable dating, for both parties (unless it's just some straight up sugar daddy / gold digger thing, which is more like prostitution than dating).

 

I'm pretty broke and have been my whole life, never made much above $20k a year even before taxation. Have never lived alone. Have often been a pedestrian. Would really only feel comfortable dating someone in a similar boat, but men in that kind of boat seem to want to focus on getting wealthier / more independent, so they can get better women. I'm always trying but honestly don't ever see myself climbing out of the lower economic class, so it sort of all feels pointless most of the time, as far as dating goes.

 

I'd like to find a guy similar to me, though, like who is a hard worker even if he's stuck at McDonalds for a long time, and who isn't all hung up and bent out of shape about being broke. I can genuinely feel comfortable with a very modest lifestyle and the little things in life, but it seems like a lot of people can't, and it's not like it's their fault. People can't help how they feel. And ambition is a good thing, not a bad thing, so it's not like I'd want to discourage them if they were super driven to move up the ladder or anything. So it just kinda bleh.

[Lernaean_Hydra]

Personally, as someone in their 20s I don't expect men in my age bracket to be financially solvent or completely independent with lots of ready money. In fact, the only people I know around this age who are/were like that are not exactly getting their income legally. However, there's a difference between not having much cash to spare and not having any money at all. Even to take care of basic necessities.

 

It's one thing to fall into dating or a relationship by meeting random people to spend time with incidentally (through friends, while at school, etc), it's another thing entirely to be actively pursuing dating or relationships when you've got nothing going for you. If you're financially in dire straits dating should be the furthest thing from your mind. It's just impractical and kind of selfish.

 

I have no problem paying my share for anything but I'm damn sure not about to pay yours too on a consistent basis. I've been burned like that before and I'm not looking to do it again.

[smg15]

Im on a budget so my max is two dates a month lol