Something has Changed in the Women

[Trenton100]

There really are "clingy" and "needy" people men are not exempt and you don't need to make up a new definition!

 

I just did and I'm right.

[Winterina]

I dont know, all that matters to me is that when all is said and done they still look good naked.

 

They? All of them? Gimme a naked woman...HUMP!!!

[Phoe]

And what of the women who aren't like the ones described in the OP?

 

None of those descriptions apply to me. In fact, I'm pretty simple when it comes to dating.

[Rydo]

They? All of them? Gimme a naked woman...HUMP!!!

 

I dont wish to judge, I think you could say there is someone out there for everyone of you want to be polite.

 

For me if they are athletic, blonde/redhead and under 27 then chances are ill find at least the body part attractive. But that doesn't have the same ring to it.

 

And what of the women who aren't like the ones described in the OP?

 

None of those descriptions apply to me. In fact, I'm pretty simple when it comes to dating.

 

Clearly anyone that doesn't fit the stereotype doesn't exist. So could you go on not existing in silence

Edited December 29, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Merge

[Trenton100]

I just don't get it. I've read so many profiles claiming to want a "real man" and "no games" until you find one who is sincere and committed only to turn around and start with the "deh ur clingly I don't wanna rush things".

 

Here's what I want. I want the definitions of the following:

 

Clingy: Explain what that is? Guys trying to talk to you by showing interest and taking the time to describe themselves? Guys who are interests enough to want to see you? Guys who are looking for something serious? Please tell.

 

Rushing things: Like guys who don't multi-date by treating woman like they are window dressing in a shopping mall? Expecting just the slightest of commitment by expecting to only date one person at a time because you know, its right?

 

Pushy: Oh I love this one. Guys who expect you to marry them in a week? I've never experienced that. Guys who text you wondering why you think their stupid when you say "text you later", then all day goes by with nothing only to come back with "I was busy"?

 

Maybe some of us don't want our intelligence insulted. Has anyone ever thought of that?

 

OLD is BUNK.

[Rydo]

To me it seems like because you dont like OLD then you say its bunk and whinge about it. Dating is supposed to be fun!

 

But that doesn't mean always getting your own way when it comes to women wanting you or not. And yeh they aren't always clear about what they want but that's because lots of people aren't clear about what they want to themselves so its difficult to tell someone else what you actually want.

[Ruby Slippers]

I agree that the world is changing fast, largely due to social engineering. Part of the globalists' (1%) agenda is population control, and what better way to achieve that end than to wear down the notion of family? The core of any strong, healthy society are strong, healthy families - not more and more isolation.

 

In spite of the attack on our humanity from every front, some of us (like me) are consciously resisting the decline. I'm looking for good, old-fashioned love with a man I can create a family with. But I'm just a drop of water in a tidal wave - hopefully more people will keep waking up from all the destructive programming.

 

Birth rate - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

According to U.S. federal-government data released in March 2011, births fell four percent from 2007 to 2009 (the largest drop in the U.S. for any two-year period since the 1970s). Births have declined for three consecutive years, and are now seven percent below the 2007 peak. This drop has continued through 2010, according to data released by the U.S. National Center for Health Statistics in June 2011. Experts have suggested that this decline is a reflection of unfavorable economic conditions. The connection between birth rate and economic conditions stems from the fact that US birth rates have fallen to levels comparable to those during the Great Depression during the 1930s.

 

The United States population growth is at an historical low level as the United States current birth rates are the lowest ever recorded. The low birth rates in the contemporary United States can possibly be ascribed to the recession, which led women to postpone having children and fewer immigrants coming to the US. The current US birth rates are not high enough to maintain the size of the U.S. population, according to The Economist.

[Rejected Rosebud]

Here's what I want. I want the definitions of the following:

 

Clingy: Explain what that is? Guys trying to talk to you by showing interest and taking the time to describe themselves? Guys who are interests enough to want to see you? Guys who are looking for something serious? Please tell.

No. It's a guy OR A GIRL who doesn't take a hint or a direct request to leave somebody alone, you're not interested, etc. And/ or who appears to have nothing going on in their life as soon as you started dating (after describing themselves as all interesting). All the way to stalking behavior, showing up, lurking, etc. I swear that there are just as many girls who act clingy all the way to "creepy" as guys this is where the well known term "bunny boiler" comes from!!! :bunny: (don't boil this bunny!)

 

Rushing things: Like guys who don't multi-date by treating woman like they are window dressing in a shopping mall? Expecting just the slightest of commitment by expecting to only date one person at a time because you know, its right?

Rushing things is pretty self explanatory and there are just as many, maybe even more guys who complain about the girls trying to drag them to the alter, putting a bunch of wedding stuff on Pinterest after a couple of dates, red flags, run! Different senses of timing or expectations of the potential relationship.

 

Pushy: Oh I love this one. Guys who expect you to marry them in a week? I've never experienced that. Guys who text you wondering why you think their stupid when you say "text you later", then all day goes by with nothing only to come back with "I was busy"?

??? I don't get your examples, but I am sure you have met pushy guys and girls before, pushy is pushy, it can be a turn off. Don't you think so?

 

Maybe some of us don't want our intelligence insulted. Has anyone ever thought of that?

 

Nobody likes that! I sure don't!

[Rydo]

I agree that the world is changing fast, largely due to social engineering. Part of the globalists' (1%) agenda is population control, and what better way to achieve that end than to wear down the notion of family? The core of any strong, healthy society are strong, healthy families - not more and more isolation.

 

In spite of the attack on our humanity from every front, some of us (like me) are consciously resisting the decline. I'm looking for good, old-fashioned love with a man I can create a family with. But I'm just a drop of water in a tidal wave - hopefully more people will keep waking up from all the destructive programming.

 

Birth rate - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

It isnt news that birth rates fall in wealthy countries. Infant mortality will also be really low. That doesn't make it some kind of illuminati agenda type thing.

[GemmaUK]

Gawd!

 

 

I'm a 45 yo woman with no children.

 

 

I would prefer to date a man of around my own age who has children (reason being I was a carer for both of my parents and to me a man who has been through 'stuff' in that sense to me is more rounded)

I have no children because my folks were older when they had me and this was back in 1969. All of my friends had grandparents the same age as my parents.

I figured I wouldn't have children if I hadn't by the age of 25 and if I wasn't settled or ready to. So..I didn't. I was with someone and was from age 22 to 36 but was doing a full time job and caring for my father at the time.

 

 

By the way, when I have dated men with children (2 so far) I never expected nor wanted to be top priority. In my view his children should be the top priority.

Family is really important to me and I don't want to date a man for whom it isn' important to him.

 

 

I have dated 3 men from OLD, one abandoned his daughters (not for me but years before) and I was top priority..well..second..to his drinking. He was a nice guy. I had no idea about the drinking until several months had passed. I spent Christmas with him and was concerned why he was not in touch with his daughters. He told me that he didn't really care about them.

He sent me countless presents after we split up and would not leave me alone.

 

 

Next guy, also nice, it came out along the way that he was not paying maintenance so had a constant argument going on with his ex wife.

His children were not allowed at his home as he rented from a convicted child abuser.

It took 4 years after only 5 weeks of dating him to get rid of him - via the police as he would not give up.

 

 

The next guy, also nice, he had no children but he still lived at home with his parents at 42. He still does now at 44. He had 2 Mums as his best friend from school's Mum was a surrogate mother to him. He was totally not grown up and would have toddler type tantrums..yep..he would throw his 18 stone on the floor...

 

 

All these guys declared love within two weeks.

They all cried when I ended it.

 

 

They all needed to know every exact move I made - literally - from whether I was awake/asleep (yes they would check if I was asleep - I switched my phone off at night early on).

 

 

I had to justify my work, shopping, anything I did..even watching a tv show.

 

 

It has put me off OLD..for almost 2 years.

 

 

Sane men are tough to find.

It all has to be NOW and 100%.

 

 

Gimme the old days..no texts..a call to arrange a date..bliss!

I never get a chance to miss a man these days - they go OTT and into lockdown way too soon for me.

[Trenton100]

To me it seems like because you dont like OLD then you say its bunk and whinge about it. Dating is supposed to be fun!

 

But that doesn't mean always getting your own way when it comes to women wanting you or not. And yeh they aren't always clear about what they want but that's because lots of people aren't clear about what they want to themselves so its difficult to tell someone else what you actually want.

 

Hahaha let me know when the fun begins.

 

Dude for guys like me who grew up in the 80s it is bunk. The entire nature of it is designed to completely weed out the emotional and logical aspects of relationships. I would love too see how people would handle themselves in person, without the the tools to portray themselves in such phony, positive light.

[Rommex]

I'm a 43 year old man, with a great career and lifestyle and I was married for 10 years prior to getting a divorce because she "didn't know how to love me and the kids at the same time". Now, when she said this it hurt me more than I realized but years later, what she said comes back to me as a symptom of things in our world today that I believe has caused women (and probably men) to change. I believe in the last 20 years, women have changed. I'm coming at this from a perspective as a completely happy, attractive and sincere man, so forgive me if this is one sided. I've dated now for 7 years and have met all kinds of women. I've been developing this theory and have now come to put it to paper. Here is why I think women have changed and the next step is to go about overcoming it.

 

1) I believe OLD has changed the game forever. It has become too easy to "find something better" and I mean this for both genders. If you meet someone and hit a rough patch it is way too easy to just say pound sand and go online and find someone else.

 

When women do this, they don't allow any time or self introspection for healing. I can't tell you how many women I have met who are online and less than a week out of a relationship that broke badly. Too many to count actually. Men are more easily able to adapt to this type of change because we don't invest as much emotion into relationships right off the bat.

 

2) Since many fathers suck at being fathers, raising children has caused women to be unable to rearrange priorities to make room for a man in her life. I've experienced this on a number of occasions. Men get moved down the priority list while married and after divorce women are not willing to make men a priority because of whatever past hurt they have experienced.

 

3) Men on OLD sites tend to be seen as creepy and psychotic because of the sheer number of messages they send and the wacky crap they say to get a womans attention and therefore being "a nice guy" is no longer the norm and is seen as some type of closet sociopath by women. Women meet so few nice guys that they no longer know how to handle a nice man who is happy with no other agenda than to live happily.

 

This is just my theory from my own personal experience. People are not willing to make the necessary emotional committment to relationships anymore. Either that or they are just not able to commit the necessary emotions to a relationship because of past issues. Either way, the game has changed.

 

Don't you just love it? A guy goes on a date and she rants about her horrible exes. He tries to gently change the subject to no avail. She tells him that she just wants to meet someone normal. Five minutes later she abruptly has to go because she left her clothers in the dryer. She says she had a good time. He calls her the next day. No answer, leaves message, call no returned. She goes out with girlfriends, complains that all guys are evil, mentions that her date creeped her out because he was too nice and not manly.

[Rommex]

I just don't get it. I've read so many profiles claiming to want a "real man" and "no games" until you find one who is sincere and committed only to turn around and start with the "deh ur clingly I don't wanna rush things".

 

Here's what I want. I want the definitions of the following:

 

Clingy: Explain what that is? Guys trying to talk to you by showing interest and taking the time to describe themselves? Guys who are interests enough to want to see you? Guys who are looking for something serious? Please tell.

 

Rushing things: Like guys who don't multi-date by treating woman like they are window dressing in a shopping mall? Expecting just the slightest of commitment by expecting to only date one person at a time because you know, its right?

 

Pushy: Oh I love this one. Guys who expect you to marry them in a week? I've never experienced that. Guys who text you wondering why you think their stupid when you say "text you later", then all day goes by with nothing only to come back with "I was busy"?

 

Maybe some of us don't want our intelligence insulted. Has anyone ever thought of that?

 

OLD is BUNK.

 

No clue what today's modern women want to have. No clue.

 

If a guy writes a well thought out message he's assumed to be using a deceptive ploy to get in bed with her.

 

If a guy writes 'ur hot babe' she'll give him credit for being honest.

[cdt76]

I love the defensive nature of women who post here. It is not an afront to declare the way your gender thinks about relationships has changed. I'm not going by stereotypes here at all. My initial post and followups come directly from real life experiences with women whom I've met in every variety of ways.

 

I totally disagree with the premise that because someone has kids that you can not become a priority. Kids, and I have 2, will always be high on the priority list but if a woman comes along and I fall madly in love, then she moves to the head of the list. Children will be loved and that love will be shown but if dad and girl friend/wife are not happy then the FAMILY can not be happy. This is a major reason my marriage failed. I was moved down the priority list and I believe many, many men are moved down by women. Men have allowed it to happen. Men have allowed too much control of the relationships to be taken over by the female side and once that power is taken women will not give it back and usually the relationship falls apart. Call that stereotyping but again it was personal experience. Simple fact is that the familial heirarchy is nonexistent anymore.

 

Men who are healthy, attractive, good careers and who are happy are very hard to find. Thus I find myself in that exact situation and I haven't had a relationship last longer than 8 months. Why? Because the women I have met, be it good or bad choices, all of them, in the past 7 years, were not ready for a real relationship. I have proposed only a theory about why this has occured and nothing more.

 

The descriptions of "Clingy", "needy", "overwhelming", "stalking" all have legitimate examples of men and women who have defined those words. However, the constant use and overuse of them lead me to believe it's a way for women to justify their own faults about lack of dating success. I have been called all the above at one point or another over the past 7 years and I can tell you, I am not any of the above nor was I the reason many of the relationships ended. Personal experience again.

[Rommex]

These women define the words to suit themselves and are defensive because they can't take being wrong about anything. Today's modern woman can't stand to single for a minute yet they berate guys who've been single for a long time as being undesirable. She is always looking to upgrade and he had better be really good at sex because if he doesn't perform the first time, he won't be getting a second chance.

[GemmaUK]

I love the defensive nature of women who post here. It is not an afront to declare the way your gender thinks about relationships has changed. I'm not going by stereotypes here at all. My initial post and followups come directly from real life experiences with women whom I've met in every variety of ways.

 

I totally disagree with the premise that because someone has kids that you can not become a priority. Kids, and I have 2, will always be high on the priority list but if a woman comes along and I fall madly in love, then she moves to the head of the list. Children will be loved and that love will be shown but if dad and girl friend/wife are not happy then the FAMILY can not be happy. This is a major reason my marriage failed. I was moved down the priority list and I believe many, many men are moved down by women. Men have allowed it to happen. Men have allowed too much control of the relationships to be taken over by the female side and once that power is taken women will not give it back and usually the relationship falls apart. Call that stereotyping but again it was personal experience. Simple fact is that the familial heirarchy is nonexistent anymore.

 

Men who are healthy, attractive, good careers and who are happy are very hard to find. Thus I find myself in that exact situation and I haven't had a relationship last longer than 8 months. Why? Because the women I have met, be it good or bad choices, all of them, in the past 7 years, were not ready for a real relationship. I have proposed only a theory about why this has occured and nothing more.

 

The descriptions of "Clingy", "needy", "overwhelming", "stalking" all have legitimate examples of men and women who have defined those words. However, the constant use and overuse of them lead me to believe it's a way for women to justify their own faults about lack of dating success. I have been called all the above at one point or another over the past 7 years and I can tell you, I am not any of the above nor was I the reason many of the relationships ended. Personal experience again.

 

 

 

But, you are saying all women are like this.

I said three men were clingy/needy etc. One was abusive.

 

 

I love men..they are great fun to be around. Something I wouldn't be without single or not.

 

 

You don't appear to like women any longer..'some' I understand but all?

[Rommex]

But, you are saying all women are like this.

I said three men were clingy/needy etc. One was abusive.

 

 

I love men..they are great fun to be around. Something I wouldn't be without single or not.

 

 

You don't appear to like women any longer..'some' I understand but all?

 

It may not be all but it sure is close. Dating is now worse than a job interview. She asks questions trying to find fault and many gotcha questions. Smooth talking guys can navigate this by telling her what she wants to hear but other guys can't. Why should guys call when women don't answer and don't return messages. My favorite was when a message was returned 2 months later and I didn't remember who she was. At least she returned the message.

[cdt76]

It may not be all women but damn if it isn't close. ROMMEX, you are so right. Women can not STAND to be wrong. I'm such an easy going guy. I don't sweat the small stuff but when I know 100% about something and she still wants to argue about it?

 

Oh and yeah, sex. If you don't do it exactly like she wants it's over. I've even lost dating a girl because I DIDN'T have sex with her.

[LookAtThisPOst]

With both parties, people now tend to go into marriages with the attitude of , "If it doesn't work out, we can always get a divorce."

 

It may not be all women but damn if it isn't close. ROMMEX, you are so right. Women can not STAND to be wrong. I'm such an easy going guy. I don't sweat the small stuff but when I know 100% about something and she still wants to argue about it?

 

Oh and yeah, sex. If you don't do it exactly like she wants it's over. I've even lost dating a girl because I DIDN'T have sex with her.

 

Yes, there are a lot of double standards that mostly favor the woman when it comes to dating and sexual relations. If a woman says "I want to wait." Then you BETTER be okay with it, because if you dump her..."You were just wanting a cheap lay."

 

But if it's the other way around, she'll consider the man socially inept, gay, or have some kind of mental deficiency.

Edited December 29, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Merge

[DrReplyInRhymes]

This is a subject I feel very strongly about. Please understand I am speaking passionately about this rather than politely.

 

In all honesty, this entire thread is the what the "red pill" is about. Most people are mistakenly told red pill dating is something to improve your dating game only. In a sense, it goes hand in hand with learning how to be a MAN. If you improve yourself as a MAN, and improve your MASCULINE TRAITS, you WILL BE SUCCESSFUL in dating. Women naturally respond to those guys who are stable, successful (in one way or another), and are MASCULINE. Sure, there are exceptions and everyone likes something different. However, you can't apply exceptions to tried and true methods that are being PROVEN everyday.

 

Required reading for anyone interested: No More Mr. Nice Guy - Robert Glover

 

Synopsis: "Glover's premise is that nice guys have been conditioned by their childhoods and by society to believe that they will be successful only if they make everyone happy and never cause any problems for others. However, this desire for approval results in self-loathing. In other words, nice guys want approval, but don't think they deserve it. This creates internal frustration, since nice guys never try to obtain what they want in life. In addition, the nice guy's desire to obtain approval from everyone (especially women), causes him to actually behave in very un-nice ways. This includes dishonesty (about themselves) and passive-aggressive behavior ("being unavailable, forgetting, being late, not following through...").

 

Dr. Glover's prescription involves getting nice guys to recognize that their needs and desires are important, and that to make others happy they must first learn to make themselves happy. One of the primary ways advised in the book to remedy this is for nice guys to learn to embrace and develop their masculine traits, instead of fearing and suppressing them."

 

----

 

You want to be a better man? Today you start! Read this book. It will help immensely in your journey in becoming a MAN instead of a NICE GUY.

 

You want that woman to give you attention? Become the MAN she's innately attracted to.

 

You want that woman to stop putting you off when you want a date?

Become the MAN her body and mind can't refuse.

 

You want women to start asking YOU for second dates rather than having to do all the work (and concurrently being labeled as needy, clingy, or creepy?) Then read this book, among lots of others, and start becoming a MAN of value, rather than the BOY you've become.

 

Too many men stand around bitching about what went wrong. Sure, there's a time and place for that. But MEN are people of action. You want something in this world? You go and get it. Can't get it? Solve a ****ing problem and get closer to getting it.

 

Case in point:

You want a woman. You have problems with dates being interested. What do you do?

 

A. Sit and cry that the woman doesn't want you, doesn't appreciate you, etc.

 

B. Change yourself into what a woman, or other women, want.

 

Granted, there will be circumstances in which you are FINE and the woman you want / got dismissed by are simply not compatible. That's fine. Move on.

 

You want a woman to appreciate you?

Become the man that is appreciated. Attract the woman that will allow you to BE A MAN. Don't settle for less, don't try to change a feminist. That's like asking for a Honda Civic and expecting it to become an Aston Martin down the road. That's ludicrous.

 

It's amazing how many men want to complain about not attracting attention from the women, or being dismissed all the time.

 

If you want to attract women, become someone attractive.

 

It's that simple. It just takes work, something A MAN would be willing to do.

 

Forgive my novel. As I stated before, I feel very strongly about this subject. I have my own flaws and I am far from perfect, but attracting women has NEVER been a problem. Being in a healthy relationship, however.......cough.... I have issues that I need to fix (notice, ACTION in FIXING) in order to become better in a relationship, but that doesn't stop me from attracting women.

 

However, my skewed concept of what a MAN was in my younger days has since been replaced with what was once expected of men. My dealings with women, both in the past and present, have further validated this unspoken "truth" along with MILLIONS of other men in case anyone wants to question my credibility.

 

I want to settle down with someone. But before I settle down with someone, I need to make sure I am the MAN I want to be in order to attract the kind of WOMAN I want in my life.

 

Just takes commitment...and work.

Edited December 29, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Response to deleted post redacted.

[elaine567]

Have things really changed that much or is it that in this modern day culture, there is now an older generation of "daters".

Daters, men and women who have been through the mill, daters who should be out mowing lawns and flower arranging are ploughing through OLD looking for hot people to hang about with and moaning when it doesn't work out for them.

 

The adoption of youth culture in all strata of society, means older daters are not joining dancing or evening classes in order to meet suitable mates, they are on OLD oogling fit young bodies and sending ridiculous, meaningless texts ad infinitum.

They are acting like teenagers, but they are teenagers with a whole lot of emotional baggage.

 

SO whilst the real young are doing what they have always done, ie sowing wild oats, flitting from relationship to relationship with hardly a care, there are a whole lot of older folk now trying to do the same.

BUT older baggage tends to really hurt, many are war-weary from bad relationships. Bitterness and resentment kicks in too and some are just not prepared for the rigours of dating again.

OLD allows them to have unrealistic expectations of who they can attract, so they fall prey to people who do not want long term relationships, people who want to play around, and whist some may think they like it that way, they are often just protecting their battered hearts from further damage.

 

It seems to me this raft of older daters have gatecrashed the dating scene, a dating scene that primarily caters for the young.

They do not really belong there, and are thus often paying the penalty.

Edited December 29, 2014 by elaine567
paragraphs

[Winterina]

I totally disagree with the premise that because someone has kids that you can not become a priority. Kids, and I have 2, will always be high on the priority list but if a woman comes along and I fall madly in love, then she moves to the head of the list. Children will be loved and that love will be shown but if dad and girl friend/wife are not happy then the FAMILY can not be happy. This is a major reason my marriage failed. I was moved down the priority list and I believe many, many men are moved down by women. Men have allowed it to happen. Men have allowed too much control of the relationships to be taken over by the female side and once that power is taken women will not give it back and usually the relationship falls apart. Call that stereotyping but again it was personal experience. Simple fact is that the familial heirarchy is nonexistent anymore.

 

Men who are healthy, attractive, good careers and who are happy are very hard to find. Thus I find myself in that exact situation and I haven't had a relationship last longer than 8 months. Why? Because the women I have met, be it good or bad choices, all of them, in the past 7 years, were not ready for a real relationship. I have proposed only a theory about why this has occured and nothing more.

 

Hasn't anyone picked up on this? This sounds scary to me.

What the OP is looking for and complains about is that he is not nr one priority for the woman with children. He feels he has no power to control, that women became too powerful for him to handle it.

He also thinks that he lost the women for the past 7 years because they were not ready for 'real relationship'. I think they were just scared of his concept of real relationship.

[toscaroscura]

I just don't understand this whole mindset. My heart has been through the ringer this past year. I have dated liars, manipulators, jerks. A few nice ones with no spark. Basically, I have had no luck.

 

But I would never think to say that all men are this way. One person's sample size does not constitute a valid assessment of the population.

 

If I were to go on a rant about how all men are such liars and such, and the rotten state of OLD, I'd get called bitter and hung out to dry for painting 50% of the population with the same brush.

 

And they'd be correct to do so!

[toscaroscura]

Have things really changed that much or is it that in this modern day culture, there is now an older generation of "daters".

Daters, men and women who have been through the mill, daters who should be out mowing lawns and flower arranging are ploughing through OLD looking for hot people to hang about with and moaning when it doesn't work out for them.

 

The adoption of youth culture in all strata of society, means older daters are not joining dancing or evening classes in order to meet suitable mates, they are on OLD oogling fit young bodies and sending ridiculous, meaningless texts ad infinitum.

They are acting like teenagers, but they are teenagers with a whole lot of emotional baggage.

 

SO whilst the real young are doing what they have always done, ie sowing wild oats, flitting from relationship to relationship with hardly a care, there are a whole lot of older folk now trying to do the same.

BUT older baggage tends to really hurt, many are war-weary from bad relationships. Bitterness and resentment kicks in too and some are just not prepared for the rigours of dating again.

OLD allows them to have unrealistic expectations of who they can attract, so they fall prey to people who do not want long term relationships, people who want to play around, and whist some may think they like it that way, they are often just protecting their battered hearts from further damage.

 

It seems to me this raft of older daters have gatecrashed the dating scene, a dating scene that primarily caters for the young.

They do not really belong there, and are thus often paying the penalty.

 

There is a LOT of truth to this. Especially if the older person spent most of their younger years with the same person from a young age. They remember the older ways, and go into it with a lot more idealism than is healthy. Then they get their heart knocked around a bit as I did, and learn to be wary.

 

But giving into bitterness is a choice. Refusing to adapt is also a choice.

[Detectingfreak]

Tell me about it. Right now I'm dealing with someone who is feels like she needs to stay "protected" because she has a bad string of cheaters in her life. That's fine and dandy until I try to have a conversation outside of the normal only to get short responses.

 

 

I really like her too. Good personality and we're both attracted to each other. The problem is if the conversations don't pick up, then everything is going to fade out. There's no reason to think you can simply keep texting and continue to keep everything short and develop anything.

 

 

So then I stop and think to myself "What was the point of signing up to begin with?"

 

 

I've already decided that I'm done with OLD. I hope it works out with her but if not, no way in hell I'm signing back up to any of those sites.

 

 

Even when I am 25 I have experienced this. This is why I am constituting my life to work, friends and partying. Dating in 2014 is not at all okay because there is too much room for cheating or someone being hurt by their one word responses. I agree that OLD is a waste of time. I dated 7 different woman and all of them seemed to have really protective issues as the original OP is talking about. WTF is with woman being so protective in this century. They are going to lead themselves down a lonely road and I mean lonely if they don't let a man into their lives.

 

I also really hate the slow factor. How slow can they go before having a committed relationship! I mean seriously! It took my ex almost a year before saying yes! Okay I am done with my rant, but just relieze 2014 is not a time to date. No dating.