Money marriage and greed

[Got it]

Well...Removing all the distractive smokes screens from your post, I'll ask again.....

 

Do you believe a man should pay for a date in general simply because he asked a woman out....YES OR NO, or should it be split?

 

Now remember what you have been saying thus far eh

 

I think the one asking out should plan to pay. I think the recipient should be opening to paying, I think who pays should be discussed prior to the date if monies are expected to be used.

 

I have had my expenses paid, I have paid, I have gone dutch. Some men like to pay and are quite insulted not to. There is that element that is taken into account that you don't want to hurt the other person's feelings so an offer should be made.

 

If you don't want to pay, don't initiate the date, wait to be asked out.

[Got it]

Oh, BTW, this argument that women want a "college educated guy" so they can have "stimulating" convos with?

 

Again, listen to the part with the 17 year old. Where does the market for gossip shows, reality TV, and ID comes from? Women....

 

When I was a little girl, my misogynistic dad "spewed" several statements like that and now that I'm older I see it is true when it comes to a lot of women.

 

Women don't sit around demanding their husband talk to them about politics, science, the news. They wanna talk about "feelings". And, when women are with their gfs, all they talk about is "feelings", gossip, fashion, you know the deal.

Again, another reason I can't be friends much females.

 

Sounds like you swallowed a lot of that misogyny.

 

Marriages, and people, are all different. While feelings are discussed by both sexes at some point, I have been surrounded by a number of woman who want to discuss, and find men, who discuss science, current events, etc.

[Tayken]

So everything worked out in your favour and you still have the attitude you do? Every one of us here has had someone who has hurt us, mistreated us or used us. Focusing on that only hurts you. Realize that it is that person and move forward. Embrace the positives in your life and let go of the past, otherwise you are letting that person control you. Why would you give this person that much power?

 

Thanks for this, you make a valid point and I am doing just that, thanks to the almighty lord, and my son being part of my life.

 

Hope the new year brings you and yours joy and happiness!

 

Tayken

[Gloria25]

I have a theory on people who refer to women as "females"...it never fails.

 

So if women are this way, what are you? Oh you're different? Why do you get that privilege to be different? Own it then...if you want to cast all women in such a light, you better pick up that banner and carry it with you as well. You don't get to cast aspersion then opt out.

 

You post a lot of disdainful things about women and based on what you say of your dad and what I know of how our parents affect us, you didn't come to realize any truth, you are a productive of being fed his nonsense. It's not a crime but we have to realize how our thoughts come to be shaped and then change them based on reality. Watching some bizarre youtube video of a set of people saying whatever they are saying, anyone with any sense knows, that this cannot then be extrapolated to everyone. This is not rocket science, and this is coming from a woman who can actually thin with a brain that has been taught how to do legitimate research and not use random foolishness to make broad claims...if I ever tried to do that in my work I would be asked kindly to leave because I clearly don't understand what's going on.

 

Speak for yourself and your friends only. ALL my friends are brilliant and well-rounded and don't "demand" their husbands/bfs talk to them about anything, they choose intelligent men to date who also realize they are brilliant and well-rounded and can talk about a range of topics and yes *gasp* well rounded people can talk about feelings too and tend to be emotionally intelligent.

 

I mean...I truly feel bad for those living in a world where they only know gossipy airheads because my world is far far far removed from that. Instead of using your small world to determine all women are such a way (but conveniently excluding yourself), expand your horizons and come play with some grown up women.

 

Always "one gender/group" coming to attack one who doesn't "follow the herd"...

 

As if I care if I get casted away from Amazon island.

 

When I post - regardless of males or females - I bring honesty to the table. Videos like the OP posted wouldn't exist if there was some honesty from certain genders.

 

If there are "exceptions" to the generalities - good. But have some honesty to realize that generalizations just don't come from anywhere.

 

I rather be "honest" then stick with the crowd.

[autumnnight]

Of course there is some truth to the video. There are some shallow, empty headed women out there. Like, totally.

 

There was some truth to my horoscope awhile back.

 

There are as many versions of people as there are people. A wise person is smart and has their eyes wide open, and if it becomes apparent that the man or woman they are with or considering being with is a bubble-headed, money grubbing piece of arm candy, they walk away. It doesn't take a lot of intelligence to ferret those kinds of women out, IMO.

 

And I do get the intelligence thing. I would be bored to tears if I couldn't talk about literature, science, philosophy, or politics with a man. Yeah, if I love him I'm probably going to spew some feelings too. And, predictably, pink is my favorite color.

 

But women are who they are. I know women who hate pink, wear Doc Martens every day, and are just a "feminine" as me in a different way. I wish we could just see people as people. Avoid the crappy ones and embrace the interesting and great ones, even if they are different from us.

 

Now I'll go sing kumbaya lol

[Tayken]

But women are who they are.

 

Well....I think a lot of us have established that already.

 

I know women who hate pink, wear Doc Martens every day,

 

There comes a point when everyone needs to grow out of them, and this coming from a Brit who was them as a kid.

 

Now jeans on the other hand, I detest it and nothing feminine about it on a woman. ewww

[chimpanA-2-chimpanZ]

When I post - regardless of males or females - I bring honesty to the table. Videos like the OP posted wouldn't exist if there was some honesty from certain genders.

 

This is like saying that racist jokes wouldn't exist if there wasn't some truth to them. Come on. I don't advocate stereotypes just because there's "some truth".

 

Have you considered that entertainment, horoscopes, gossip, etc may be marketed to women because for hundreds of years women have been told they have no place in politics, science, math, and so on? I am a 28-year-old in a strongly male-dominated field, and even here in the US I'm regularly reminded that I don't belong. I am fighting for a career position at a government agency that didn't even allow women in my particular role until the 1980s. And I can't tell you how many men like to remind me of that every. single. day.

 

Blaming women for liking gossip and pop-y stuff is ridiculous. It's not my bag of chips but so what? People like what makes them happy. The whole pop culture industry was created FOR women, not by them. Hell, we still don't have many female magazine editors or show producers. Are you really going to blame women for enjoying something that was designed specifically to cater to them?

 

It does no one any good to trash other women. It just makes you sound like the girl who's desperate to win men's hearts by talking crap about other women and proving how different she is. "Girls who diet all the time are stupid, am I right?" Look, no one thinks all women have to agree all the time. We shouldn't agree; we're all unique individuals. But because we're all different, we shouldn't be making generalizations about ourselves, either. We may be different but we're all in this together.

 

My boyfriend claims part of the reason he fell in love with me was because I was more intellectual than any woman he'd ever met, but most of my closest female friends are math majors and scientists. I think he simply never bothered to seek out women who were on his mental wavelength, or he didn't think they existed. There are hundreds of millions of women who aren't interested in ~feelings~ and whatever else. If you don't see women who are interested in hard sciences then you're choosing not to see them. And claiming that they don't exist makes it that much more discouraging and alienating for women who have those interests.

[autumnnight]

Well....I think a lot of us have established that already.

 

 

 

There comes a point when everyone needs to grow out of them, and this coming from a Brit who was them as a kid.

 

Now jeans on the other hand, I detest it and nothing feminine about it on a woman. ewww

 

When I said women are who they are, I meant that each women is her own person (one would hope) and not all of us are the same. But yes, I am well aware that many on LS believe that all of us are worthless money hungry witches who out to be eradicated except for the occasional roll in the hay.

 

Regarding Doc Martens, I've never had a pair, but I do like my pink Nike's for comfort. Lol. If the jeans have sparkly stuff on the backside are they okay...and if they're bootcut?

 

Oh, and I agree, a nagging wife would make anyone want to run to the corner of a rooftop.....

 

You cad! You changed your signature!

[Tayken]

When I said women are who they are, I meant that each women is her own person (one would hope) and not all of us are the same. But yes, I am well aware that many on LS believe that all of us are worthless money hungry witches who out to be eradicated except for the occasional roll in the hay.

 

Regarding Doc Martens, I've never had a pair, but I do like my pink Nike's for comfort. Lol. If the jeans have sparkly stuff on the backside are they okay...and if they're bootcut?

 

Oh, and I agree, a nagging wife would make anyone want to run to the corner of a rooftop.....

 

You cad! You changed your signature!

 

 

 

Bold 1: Your own words NOT mine, and with regards to the "roll in the hay" comment, lets not flatter ourselves, some people are not what sticking it into.

 

As a runner who has done over 95 marathons and ultras, I see a lot of people that show up with fancy gear, and they are usually the ones that come in when everybody else is long done. My point...don't care for designer gear

 

I don't wear jewellery, and prefer that my woman is not covered in it. Jeans on a woman bootcut or not doesn't do anything for me, never has done. Skirts (not short) / suits and dresses on the other hand, do it for me. Jeans seems to have turned into the lazy de-facto dress now for many, and shows lack of style

 

As for my signature, don't know what you are talking about. Hmmm...did realize I am being paid a lot of attention to, bizarre

 

Not all women care about salary. I'd rather be with a hard working man who wasn't rich than a lazy rich guy any day.

 

Oh really, but how are you going to afford all that vacation, house with all the decor to show off to friends on facebook?

[autumnnight]

Bold 1: Your own words NOT mine, and with regards to the "roll in the hay" comment, lets not flatter ourselves, some people are not what sticking it into.

 

As a runner who has done over 95 marathons and ultras, I see a lot of people that show up with fancy gear, and they are usually the ones that come in when everybody else is long done. My point...don't care for designer gear

 

I don't wear jewellery, and prefer that my woman is not covered in it. Jeans on a woman bootcut or not doesn't do anything for me, never has done. Skirts (not short) / suits and dresses on the other hand, do it for me. Jeans seems to have turned into the lazy de-facto dress now for many, and shows lack of style

 

As for my signature, don't know what you are talking about. Hmmm...did realize I am being paid a lot of attention to, bizarre

 

 

 

Oh really, but how are you going to afford all that vacation, house with all the decor to show off to friends on facebook?

 

I didn't say YOU are a woman hater I would bet that most of the guys who seem like they are on LS probably just use LS to vent the feelings they do have and are probably actually nice IRL. Or they could be asses. Who knows.

 

Marathons...wow. I'm lucky to do a couple of miles. But I don't wear my pink Nikes for that. I wear some 7 year old New Balance that hug my foot like a cloud. I know you're supposed to get new shoes every so often, but they feel so good.

 

I prefer skirts too, but it gets COLD in the winter. And I hate tights. So it's pants or hypothermia.

 

I'm weird about money. First, I want to help make it. Yeah, I know that keeping a house is a major contribution. Confession: I don't really like housework. I DO it because women are supposed to, but I'd have to kill myself if that was my main task all day every day. Plus, I like the mental challenge of my profession.

 

All I want I to know that the bills are paid on time, I have transportation that runs, There are groceries, I can get four haircuts a year (not the expensive kind, my long hair is easy to maintain), and the occasional pretty thing or pair of heels off the sale rack. But even that last thing is negotiable depending on things. I don't NEED vacations. A weekend at the beach house of a friend is enough. House? Just give me a bit of space and places for friends and family to sit in a safe neighborhood. I don't see much difference in a couch from Sam's and a couch from the overpriced boutique downtown. They are both couches.

 

Honestly, I can (and have) live on rice and beans and ground beef if I am well loved. I'd throw out all my jeans for a man who loved ME and wanted ME for me. I'm not that hard to make happy, so to speak. I don't even expect him to be responsible for my happiness. I just want us to want each other.

 

Why the heck am I rambling? I need to fold laundry.

[Tayken]

we still don't have many female magazine editors or show producers. Are you really going to blame women for enjoying something that was designed specifically to cater to them?

 

Hmmm...may I point out that the producer of the feminine shows on TV i.e. Greys anatomy, scandal, private practice is actually a woman....Shonda Rhimes born in 1970 in Chicago

 

I'd throw out all my jeans for a man who loved ME and wanted ME for me.

 

Wow.. really? I just need to work on a woman getting rid or their cat / dog next

 

I just want us to want each other.

 

A two way traffic, doesn't work if it's one way

 

Why the heck am I rambling?

 

Because you know am making sense, and you like me?

[chimpanA-2-chimpanZ]

Hmmm...may I point out that the producer of the feminine shows on TV i.e. Greys anatomy, scandal, private practice is actually a woman....Shonda Rhimes born in 1970 in Chicago

 

Yeah, you know why you can name her? Because she's a (black!) woman, and that is memorable, because there aren't very many at all. Shonda Rhimes is a phenomenon because there are so few women out there in positions of power making television shows and movies. Women are vastly outnumbered in the entertainment industry---and pretty much every industry. We still have to fight to explain ourselves to people who don't believe we're capable of doing our jobs.

 

I don't view men as a monolithic entity of immature, sloppy, video game-addicted, sex-obsessed, chest-staring neanderthals. All women aren't shallow money-grubbing skanks either. Can't we bother to get to know each other? Nobody ever went wrong by respecting someone as an individual.

[Tayken]

Women don't instinctively know one's salary. So there is more about the person before you get to any digits.

 

But assumptions are made based on type of car driven (something that has been discussed here previously), and appearance of the person. This of course comes after already asking the ubiquitous "so what do you do".

 

If a guy says he is an engineer / lawyer / doctor / IT specialist / dentist etc, you know the female is already thinking hmmmm...OK, at least decent salary as opposed to I am a shelf stocker / garbage collector / between jobs

[Tayken]

Yeah, you know why you can name her? Because she's a (black!) woman, and that is memorable, because there aren't very many at all. Shonda Rhimes is a phenomenon because there are so few women out there in positions of power making television shows and movies. Women are vastly outnumbered in the entertainment industry---and pretty much every industry. We still have to fight to explain ourselves to people who don't believe we're capable of doing our jobs.

 

I don't view men as a monolithic entity of immature, sloppy, video game-addicted, sex-obsessed, chest-staring neanderthals. All women aren't shallow money-grubbing skanks either. Can't we bother to get to know each other? Nobody ever went wrong by respecting someone as an individual.

 

 

Hmmmm....Tea Leoni is also a producer of her show...madam president currently on the air. Others include but not limited to

 

http://www.ranker.com/list/famous-female-producers/reference

[elaine567]

Of course there are men who want intellectual women, but there are also men, very successful men too, who want women as wives who are below them, intellectually, emotionally and financially.

Women chosen primarily to look good.

Younger women who will do as they are told.

Women who will look up to them.

Women who will support them in anything they want to do with no consideration for herself.

Women who are not in competition with them

Women who are "homemakers" with no individual ambition.

Women who will not challenge their authority...etc.

 

So it is all very well denigrating women who want to "marry well" or "above their station" or "gold diggers", but not ALL men want women who think for themselves, who are ambitious, who can discuss history, science and politics intelligently.

Not all men want "professional" wives.

Some men deliberately look for women that will suit the position of their "wife" and the mother of their children, and sometimes "gossipy airheads", "homemakers" and "nannies" fit that bill nicely. The fact the wife cannot support herself can be seen as a bonus to some men, not a disadvantage, as it keeps her in check.

Intellectual stimulation for the man, can happen at work, he does not necessarily need it at home too.

 

Educated women asked to play the role of housewife and SAHM, can end up bored, frustrated and resentful, so whilst it it sounds great on paper to have a relationship with a highly intelligent woman, I do not think it always works out well, due to the reality of homemaking and bringing up children, which is still seen primarily as the female role.

A tired, discontented, disgruntled, intelligent woman can be a formidable adversary, in any marriage.

Many modern women get fed up of being "used" in relationships, and I would guess it explains some of the high divorce rates.

[Tayken]

so whilst it it sounds great on paper to have a relationship with a highly intelligent woman, I do not think it always works out well, due to the reality of homemaking and bringing up children, which is still seen primarily as the female role.

 

But this is coming from a female who is not married to a female...are you? Additionally, for someone like me who is approaching it from a second go round, obviously kids is not in the works for me, and I have never waited for a woman to cook for me, attend to my gardening, iron my clothes and do laundry. So moot point to many men like me

[Got it]

But assumptions are made based on type of car driven (something that has been discussed here previously), and appearance of the person. This of course comes after already asking the ubiquitous "so what do you do".

 

If a guy says he is an engineer / lawyer / doctor / IT specialist / dentist etc, you know the female is already thinking hmmmm...OK, at least decent salary as opposed to I am a shelf stocker / garbage collector / between jobs

 

Depends on how/where you are meeting. It also says, you have ambition, have meet some career challenges, etc.

 

Personally I am going to see the above as more on par with me so I would rather date a lawyer than a shelf stocker because they are going to understand my world, and vice versa, far better. They understand a career that is really 24/7 than punching a clock. BUT this is the same with an IT person. An IT person can make six figures but still basically punching the clock. And my issue/concern is with punching the clock.

 

And, vice versa, I would be more than happy to date a horse trainer, since I am heavily into horses, which doesn't tend to result in a lot of money, but because he shares a similar passion, understands the 24/7 focus, and is competitive, is a great make up for me. He won't have money, because all one's monies goes into the horses , but these men are few and far between. And both gay and straight go fast.

 

So it depends on what someone is passionate about. Having a McMansion is not a focus of mine, and something I can do on my own. But finding someone passionate about life, passionate about things, etc. And those people are far rarer.

 

You can have all the money in the world, if you don't have things in life you are passionate about, that are similar to me (I have no interest in neoconservative individuals, or NRA focused, etc. ) that is what I was looking for.

[Got it]

But this is coming from a female who is not married to a female...are you? Additionally, for someone like me who is approaching it from a second go round, obviously kids is not in the works for me, and I have never waited for a woman to cook for me, attend to my gardening, iron my clothes and do laundry. So moot point to many men like me

 

But since you broad brush women, if you broad brush men then this is true as it is true for many. Statistically women handle the majority of the household chores and responsibilities so this is a priority.

 

And just because it is the second go around doesn't obviously mean children are not a factor. Many second marriages go on to produce children, even if there are children from the first marriage.

[Tayken]

But since you broad brush women, if you broad brush men then this is true as it is true for many. Statistically women handle the majority of the household chores and responsibilities so this is a priority.

 

And just because it is the second go around doesn't obviously mean children are not a factor. Many second marriages go on to produce children, even if there are children from the first marriage.

 

Hmmm...seems like you are really enjoying following me around aren't you?

 

Bold 1: The word some I guess is missing from your reading?

 

Bold 2: Also have high failure rates

[Tayken]

Depends on how/where you are meeting. It also says, you have ambition, have meet some career challenges, etc.

 

Personally I am going to see the above as more on par with me so I would rather date a lawyer than a shelf stocker because they are going to understand my world, and vice versa, far better. They understand a career that is really 24/7 than punching a clock. BUT this is the same with an IT person. An IT person can make six figures but still basically punching the clock. And my issue/concern is with punching the clock.

 

And, vice versa, I would be more than happy to date a horse trainer, since I am heavily into horses, which doesn't tend to result in a lot of money, but because he shares a similar passion, understands the 24/7 focus, and is competitive, is a great make up for me. He won't have money, because all one's monies goes into the horses , but these men are few and far between. And both gay and straight go fast.

 

So it depends on what someone is passionate about. Having a McMansion is not a focus of mine, and something I can do on my own. But finding someone passionate about life, passionate about things, etc. And those people are far rarer.

 

You can have all the money in the world, if you don't have things in life you are passionate about, that are similar to me (I have no interest in neoconservative individuals, or NRA focused, etc. ) that is what I was looking for.

 

 

Thanks for coming to state the obvious. I think if you are going to respond to my posts, it is probably worth looking into the archives.

[Haydn]

Not quite joining this thread. But Cherry Docs and skinny jeans do it for me every time.

[Tayken]

Not quite joining this thread. But Cherry Docs and skinny jeans do it for me every time.

 

 

That is why you are in Battersea....things have literally gone to the dogs

[Tayken]

Intellectual stimulation for the man, can happen at work, he does not necessarily need it at home too.

 

Really...you know this how, as a man experiencing just that?

[Got it]

Hmmm...seems like you are really enjoying following me around aren't you?

 

Bold 1: The word some I guess is missing from your reading?

 

Bold 2: Also have high failure rates

 

 

Bold 2: yes, well unlike some, I do not believe in speaking in absolutes so since not all second marriages have children, but many do, I qualified it. This is normal. But then broad brushing is lazy thinking. So, is princess saying he would have rather seen "some" than "many". Okay pumpkin, you are 100% right. Some second marriages produce children. Happy now?

Edited December 29, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
removed personal attack