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What's the best initial verbal response to a breakup?


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Posted

Obviously we all mostly agree NC is the best course of action once the relationship has ended. I agree with that as well. I'm wondering the best reply to a breakup? I know a natural reaction is to cry, ask lots of questions, ask for another chance to fix things etc.. Is there a correct reply? Lets assume the breakup news is completely heart breaking and it's the last possible thing on earth you want to endure.

Posted

There is no need to reply to the news of a breakup. No contact means exactly that. Don't ask any questions or look for closure, especially after the fact, because no matter what they have to say the bottom line that you need to take away from it is that they do not want to be with you. No matter the rhyme or reason, it does not matter, I repeat, they do not want to be with you.

 

I lost my dignity, asking questions, pleading, begging, groveling, crying and just being a general stage 5 clinger and I deeply regret it now. Walk away from them as they did with you and then stay away, maintain no contact and heal.

 

Cry, scream, kick, bite, wallow, do whatever you need to do to start the process of moving on but do it out of your exes sight. Believe me in the future you will thank yourself for it.

  • Like 4
Posted

When someone breaks up with you, take it as a sign that they have chose not to be with you.

 

The best thing to do is to accept it, respect their decision, walk away and then start NC immediately.

 

Not only you could show strength at the same time give yourself to grieve, work on yourself and most important thing is to move on.

  • Like 2
Posted
Obviously we all mostly agree NC is the best course of action once the relationship has ended. I agree with that as well. I'm wondering the best reply to a breakup? I know a natural reaction is to cry, ask lots of questions, ask for another chance to fix things etc.. Is there a correct reply? Lets assume the breakup news is completely heart breaking and it's the last possible thing on earth you want to endure.

 

Do you mean like, "Oh thank god! I've been meaning to bring this up with you but didn't know how. I'm so relieved that you've mentioned it first. I really do think it's for the best." Nothing after that. No more information, just keep silent on that topic. :confused::laugh:

 

If you mean what could you say to sway their decision? I don't think anything that wouldn't make you look desperate in their eyes.

Posted

Jerry Seinfeld broke up in the best way possible in the "Even Stevens" episode. Look it up.

  • Like 2
Posted
Jerry Seinfeld broke up in the best way possible in the "Even Stevens" episode. Look it up.

 

Just watched a clip of this on youtube but I get the general premise. Thanks for the ephiphany wrapped in giggles. Perfect Christmas gift. :)

Posted

'WTF?!' (jk) Hahaha

 

I think the best response is the response that comes from your heart. Screw these 'rules' about how to handle yourself. Do what feels right.

Posted

I would say "thank you for your honesty and not stringing me along. I wish you all the best in the future." Then I would walk away and change all my contact info and never talk to that person again. That is always how I handled getting dumped.:o I don't ask questions because I've heard all I want to hear which is they don't want me.

Posted

I would also just silently turn and walk away without contacting.

 

It would make me feel a lot better instead of typical clingy questions,

groveling, begging, letter sending and all other fails there are. I did

them all.

 

You just turn around and walk away.

Posted

I sighed and sat in silence for about 10 mins as he explained how he was feeling etc. and sort of asked if we can work it out and when he said no i sat in silence for a few more moments, picked up my bag and said see ya. He was the one crying, he told me to let him know if i have any questions and obviously wanted more of a response out of me.

 

I would have been quite happy with my reaction, had i not called in the following days with endless questions, pleading and tears. What a waste of time and energy that was. I would take all of that back if i could. Silence and goodbye is all that I would do in future.

  • Like 2
Posted

When my ex met with me to tell me that she was wasting my time because she didn't want a committed relationship, I just repeated back what she said and asked if she was sure and then we got up and I walked her to her car, gave her a hug and one last little kiss on the lips and said I'll miss you and walked to my car. Sent her a text afterwards telling her I appreciated how she handled it in person and I'll get my stuff in a few days.

 

Met her a few days later for my cloths and she asked if I was seeing someone. I was never with anyone else when we were together but she was always insecure because of a past relationship.

 

So, no begging and pleading so I must have been seeing someone. That offended me.

  • Like 3
Posted

I just listened to him and then we both agreed ending things was the best option, but I was fighting the tears I had in my eyes during the whole thing. Worst day of my life.

Posted
Jerry Seinfeld broke up in the best way possible in the "Even Stevens" episode. Look it up.

 

I looked it up. Pretty funny.

Posted

The best response for me is no response...

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