FixItCris Posted December 24, 2014 Posted December 24, 2014 So I have had an epiphany. One I have been avoiding but it's been staring me in the face I was a rebound that's all. I wasn't what she wanted, I was what she needed, and once she got what she needed she found what she wanted. Pretty easy to understand. Just a selfish, cowardly bitch way of doing it.
StrangerThanFiction Posted December 24, 2014 Posted December 24, 2014 So I have had an epiphany. One I have been avoiding but it's been staring me in the face I was a rebound that's all. I wasn't what she wanted, I was what she needed, and once she got what she needed she found what she wanted. Pretty easy to understand. Just a selfish, cowardly bitch way of doing it. I totally understand how you feel. I had an epiphany on the exact same thing not too long ago as well. Man did that hurt like a bitch. I realized he had just used me as a place saver until someone "better" came along. For 6 years. I'm so sorry you have to feel this way but I think it's a step on the path to healing seeing an RS for what it really was instead of what you wanted it to be. Know that you're not alone in it. ((Hug)) 1
Ieris Posted December 24, 2014 Posted December 24, 2014 I had this happen to me once, I was just there to make the ex jealous. It did hurt like a bitch when realising none of it was real. Good thing is I only wasted 3 months on him, not years. Looking back now I dodged a bullet, he's still playing her like a fool and messing with other girls. I suggest you google "people on the rebound" and learn to pick up the signs in the future. When things don't work out, I always tell myself "He just wasn't the one for me". If I ended up with him, I would have been settling. I never use people in that way and I wouldn't want someone who uses people like that either so be glad that you got to see that side of her. Break ups are hard but lots of people can pick themselves back up without using other people in such a way. Just shows how selfish and weak they are, which isn't attractive at all....
FancyFace Posted December 24, 2014 Posted December 24, 2014 I know exactly how you feel. I got dumped after a year and figured out that all I was was a painkiller for the pain he had been feeling over his ex girlfriend, who he was speaking to the entire duration of our relationship. It sucks and hurts a lot to figure out that the person you were devoted to, was simply using you but some people out there are just incredibly selfish and immature beings. Hindsight really is 20/20. When we are in the fog of falling in love and being in love, sometimes we miss all the signs staring right at us. Try evaluate what signs or behaviour you missed, take the lessons from it and try apply them moving forward. Wishing you love, light and happiness my friend. Love, light and happiness! 1
Author FixItCris Posted December 24, 2014 Author Posted December 24, 2014 I know exactly how you feel. I got dumped after a year and figured out that all I was was a painkiller for the pain he had been feeling over his ex girlfriend, who he was speaking to the entire duration of our relationship. It sucks and hurts a lot to figure out that the person you were devoted to, was simply using you but some people out there are just incredibly selfish and immature beings. Hindsight really is 20/20. When we are in the fog of falling in love and being in love, sometimes we miss all the signs staring right at us. Try evaluate what signs or behaviour you missed, take the lessons from it and try apply them moving forward. Wishing you love, light and happiness my friend. Love, light and happiness! It is horrible, but I learned some amazing things about myself this year, and some obvious signs I should never have ignored. All in all, it was not a pointless relationship, I like to think we both helped each other grow a lot. I've never actually been somebody's rebound before, so I guess I can tick that off the bucket list The positives I can take are - I must have something going for me, she was a beautiful, smart, funny woman, and I believe at one point she had fallen for me. So if I can get the kind of woman i thought she was, i will find the perfect woman for me.
batt Posted December 25, 2014 Posted December 25, 2014 (edited) I'm slowly beginning to realize that I may have been a rebound for my ex too. I feel so stupid but angry at the same time. Some of the things she said didn't add up until after I was dumped. Now that I realize that may be the reason, and why she didn't really give me a reason why I was dumped, I wish her nothing but ill will. As she said said "You're a guy, and that's what guys do". Shes a bitch and that's what bitches do. Psychotic antisocial nut job. Edited December 25, 2014 by batt
Author FixItCris Posted December 25, 2014 Author Posted December 25, 2014 I have since had another epiphany. I'm 35, I'm free. she's 38 and jumped straight into another relationship with an arsehole (her type) So really, who's the winner here? That's right. This guy. 2
FancyFace Posted December 25, 2014 Posted December 25, 2014 Exactly! With everything that happens, the best thing that you can do is find the positives in it. Even in cases where you jump, thinking you will land in a lucious pool of cool water and all you do is land in a pile of horse ****, try look for the positives in it. Horse **** can be extremely exfoliating to the skin LOL! You are in a great position now to meet the woman who will appreciate you, hold onto you for dear life and make the relationship work come thick or thin, dark or blue. She's out there and when you do finally meet her, it will all make sense why it didnt work out with the others. Oh and Merry Christmas to everyone!!!
Author FixItCris Posted December 30, 2014 Author Posted December 30, 2014 I have a lot of work ahead of me before I'll be ready to meet anyone. But hey, I wasn't ready when I met that girl, it just happened. 1
ballycastle Posted December 30, 2014 Posted December 30, 2014 So I have had an epiphany. One I have been avoiding but it's been staring me in the face I was a rebound that's all. I wasn't what she wanted, I was what she needed, and once she got what she needed she found what she wanted. Pretty easy to understand. Just a selfish, cowardly bitch way of doing it. This is probably one of the best threads i have ever read, so positive and uplifting. I am a year from this type of relationship, 6 months NC and it still hurts particularly as the rebounder kept asking for "more time" and me giving it to him as we had liked each other before but we both had prespective partners. He was a few months from a 9 year relationship, had moved out and set up home, I supported him through all that as I believed the promises of a future together and loving me. Its surreal to think that none of it was real, I was fulfiling a lost need. That is what I am still trying to get over. My question is, how do you ask the questions to check with the next that you are not a rebound? Honesty the rejection of not being as good as the ex he split with and them chasing you for months and months to dump you when he was done, there is no pain quite like it. He never actually ended it with me, just stopped contacting me so had to draw my own conclusions. It has scarred me for life.
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