I may have crazy ideas about asking a woman out but

[Darren2013]

I may have crazy ideas about how to go about asking a woman out for a date or even if to do it at all and sometimes I try and talk myself out of it completely.

 

But on those instances when I do muster up enough courage to ask a woman out and she accepts I will say at the risk of tooting my own horn that she does happen to enjoy herself even if some think I'm a little crazy with cutting dates short to like 30 minutes for the first date and 1 hour for the 2nd date and 2 hours for most dates after that.

 

The one thing I am mindful of is common complaints women have about men. One of women's biggest complaint is that we men don't listen. So it was 5 years ago when I was being more mindful to make sure that a woman is talking 70% of the time on the date. This way I'm doing more listening and less talking.

 

Besides one thing I learned from Doc Love that is good to keep in mind is that before I even open my mouth and say anything I should be asking myself "Darren are you sure that what you are about to say is going to help raise her interest level?" If it's not or if I'm having doubts then I'm better off keeping my trap shut and just focus all the conversation about her. Of course asking her questions, listening attentively to her answers and asking her more in depth questions on what she said.

 

Usually a woman feels more comfortable when a guy is encouraging her to talk more about herself. I feel comfortable too. I would much rather talk about her and her life and interests than to talk about myself. So that 30% of the time that I'm talking a good portion of that is answering any questions she asks me.

 

At first I keep my answers short and generalized and let her be the one to show an interest in pressing me for specifics about things like specifics about my job, specific details about my personal hobbies, my family, what I like to eat, where I like to travel, what I like to read about and so forth. The less information I volunteer about myself the better. If she presses for details then fine I'll answer.

 

I also believe in letting the woman pick the places she wants to go or the movies she wants to see when we go out on dates 90% of the time. 10% of the time I'll pick the movie or the place to eat and 90% of the time I'll encourage her to pick the place. Even if I didn't like the movie it's better to humor her and say that yeah I enjoyed the movie. It's just a white lie. It's not the kind of lying that is intended to use or take advantage of somebody.

 

If she invites me over for dinner and I don't like the food I'm going to tell her the opposite that the food was excellent. Why? because she spent so much time and effort preparing the meal just for me that I would feel bad telling her I didn't like the food. Besides that kind of white lie is part of good social ettiquite.

 

Compromise is an important part of a relationship especially on a man's part. It's better to risk overcompromising than to risk undercompromising and then later on she holds it over my head about how I'm an arrogant prick who demands his own way. I don't want that to come out of her mouth when it comes time to break up.

 

I open the car doors for a woman. I take her coat for her and pull out her chair. If she wants to touch me during the date I welcome it but I'm not touching her until it's established that we are boyfriend and girlfriend exclusively.

[Gloria25]

Can you just relax and date already?

 

All this rigidity makes me wonder if you can even enjoy dating with all these "lists" and "requirements".

 

When I was in jump school, one of the jump masters had to freakin' yell at me cuz I just wouldn't "fall" right. Yep, I broke down "falling" into a science.

 

Just relax already, fall - I mean, date.

 

Thank you.

[Darren2013]

Okay you do have a point about relaxing in light of my blood pressure going up at times. I think the next time I go on a date I'll remember to check my blood pressure 1 hour before the date to see just how much my blood pressure is effected from being nervous about the date. That might really prove my theory as to why I get those random high readings.

[Toodaloo]

Darren

 

One day you will stop fretting and over analyzing so much.

 

You are a sweetie but you leave me wanting to bang my head against a wall sometimes.

 

Have a wonderful Christmas and New Year won't you... and look out for mistletoe... a woman might just randomly snog you!

[evanescentworld]

I DEFINITELY have crazy ideas about how to go about asking a woman out for a date

(Fixed that for you....

 

or even if to do it at all and sometimes I try and talk myself out of it completely

. You're unambitious. Aim for 'always' not 'sometimes'....

 

But on those instances when I do muster up enough courage to ask a woman out and she accepts I will say at the risk of tooting my own horn that she does happen to enjoy herself even if some think I'm a little crazy with cutting dates short to like 30 minutes for the first date and 1 hour for the 2nd date and 2 hours for most dates after that.

 

The one thing I am mindful of is common complaints women have about men. .....

 

Besides one thing I learned from Doc Love .....Blah blah, blah...

 

 

.......we are boyfriend and girlfriend exclusively.

Do me a favour: Quit listening to what that quack 'Doc Love' keeps mumbling.

He is a near-seventy-year-old salesman who puts himself forward as a relationships expert, when he is absolutely nothing of the kind.

Drop every expectation, forget everything you've learnt and just go out with a blank slate, no statistics, no measures, no yard-sticks and get laid.

 

I think that's probably 99.99% of your problem, right there.

[Shepp]

Okay you do have a point about relaxing in light of my blood pressure going up at times. I think the next time I go on a date I'll remember to check my blood pressure 1 hour before the date to see just how much my blood pressure is effected from being nervous about the date. That might really prove my theory as to why I get those random high readings.

 

 

Hahahah Darren, only you could make relaxing so....unrelaxing! You do make me laugh brother!

I don't know how you remember what your meant to be doing all the time!

[Shepp]

Do me a favour: Quit listening to what that quack 'Doc Love' keeps mumbling.

He is a near-seventy-year-old salesman who puts himself forward as a relationships expert, when he is absolutely nothing of the kind.

Drop every expectation, forget everything you've learnt and just go out with a blank slate, no statistics, no measures, no yard-sticks and get laid.

 

I think that's probably 99.99% of your problem, right there.

 

 

Make it an experiment - you like those, right?

Next date, throw everything you've learnt out the window and go with what you feel! Let your head go to mush and follow your heart .....purely for science of course ;p