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How guys deal with baggage


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Posted

I met a guy a few months ago. We hit it off a bit and would hang out in group, but he wouldn't quite make a move, he seemed to have more of an ego than I would like, and so I pretty abruptly lost interest in hanging out with him in any capacity.

 

Fast forward to now...throughout the last few months he's made a few efforts to hang out which I didn't even fully process, mostly just fended off. But then I agreed to dinner the other night and we actually had a pretty awesome night..solid conversation and hung out for maybe 4 hours just us.

 

But again he didn't quite make a move, and almost as if to explain his behavior he slipped in mention of his ex of 6 months late in the night. Conversation turns, but I veer back and probe a bit, and turns out they had been dating for 4 years. He then says that in general he's not ready for a new relationship, so many changes in his life, but that "January is a new year"...

 

I don't think it was completely weird for him to discuss his readiness for a relationship in a broad sense (with the undertone that it was about me) but it was def a little weird since we hadn't even hung out for a few months let alone done anything physical on this date.

 

So now he wants to hang out again in a few days before leaving for holidays. I am not jumping out of my socks crazy for him at this point, but I'm definitely fixated and keen enough to be interested in dating him.

 

So, do I agree to keep hanging out with him, or send him away until he's enough over the 4-year girl? Are his mentions about her weird or sensible? Thanks for advice!

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Posted

[bump]

 

Just looking for feedback on whether it's better to continue hanging out casually (benefits are that then we become friendlier, and maybe a moment strikes when he feels recovered enough to pursue more) vs. disappear and have him seek me out if/when he's more recovered (benefit is that I'm less "available" and we don't get used to being just friendly)

Posted

Such a weird question.

Why are you thinking about a relationship with someone you dont know.

 

Its easy, if you have fun with him, go out with him, if you dont, dont.

Its not rocket surgery

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