Darren2013 Posted December 20, 2014 Posted December 20, 2014 If a person is in doubt about what they want out of a relationship then probably the friends with benefits route would be the best path to take. I find myself unsure what I want. The best thing for me is the friends with benefits path. This way there's no binding commitment and I can bail out at anytime without feeling guilty for stringing a woman along and wasting her time. She couldn't rightfully accuse me of being a jerk if I just bail out without warning because we never were in a relationship. The terms of the FWB contract are very loose which means there is an understanding that the arrangement can be terminated at any moment with or without a reason. On the other hand if I start to fall in love with my FWB I can bail out immediately then as well since the arrangement no longer serves the purpose it once did. FWB arrangement accommodates for my uncertainty about what I want because we would both be free to do what we want with our lives at any moment. So I think I will pursue a FWB and see what happens. If I get tired or bored I can end it. If I fall in love with her I can end it and either way I would have total freedom. I still plan to dress up in a suit for the first couple of meetings.
Gloria25 Posted December 20, 2014 Posted December 20, 2014 Oh, gosh, you're gonna do the "suit" thing? Please don't. I must ask, what's so terrible about a jeans and smart top that's so repulsive? I mean, did you not check out the pics I posted in your thread the other day? Anywho, like a few months ago I was thinking about something - which is, if you are not "dating material" you should not enter the dating world. But, that is one reason why I've gone with casual RLs and/or FWBs. I'm afraid that cuz I don't want kids, am independent, and quiet/stoic that I won't be able to make someone really happy. And, I have yet to find someone like me that would be happy with a person like me. I've thought of "faking it" and getting married so I'd stop jumping in/out RLs, but that wouldn't be fair to someone who wants kids and/or someone dependent on them (emotionally and/or financially, or shoot, who depends on them to do chores and stuff for them). I know that regardless of my intimacy issues, I am a "one man woman" and have a lot to offer a guy....but again, if I don't want marriage and kids, the relationship stagnates, and they move on. So, I guess I'm dooomed to an eternity of FWBs/casual things
Author Darren2013 Posted December 20, 2014 Author Posted December 20, 2014 Yeah well the whole marriage and kids thing is why I am not compatible with most women my age group. Many women (not all)have the biological clock factor in their late 20s and early 30s. So if a guy doesn't want to marry then he would do better staying away from women in that age group because the chances are that much greater that the biological clock is going to take over. Even if she is madly in love with the guy she will likely end it if he doesn't want to marry and have kids.
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