Andy567 Posted December 17, 2014 Posted December 17, 2014 Okay so I need some advice my ex girlfriend and I started dating when we were 16 and lasted 2.5 years and during that time she cheated on me with 3 other guys I won't say what she did but it wasn't nice and she lied about it for months and never intended to tell me but her friends told me after a while I forgave her and we moved on. Then last summer we split up for a while to let us both focus on our exams then afterwards we started talking about getting back together but it didn't happen we just stayed friends then we started doing things again etc and at the end of summer she stopped talking to me for about a month and afterwards started talking about getting back together with me then one of her friends told me that she had been sleeping with one of my best friends during that month and sending dirty pictures to other guys I asked her about it and she swore on our friendship that it never happened and then my friend admitted he had been sleeping with her. Then she broke down into tears telling me how she couldn't do without me etc even though literally 2 weeks before she didn't want to talk to me ever again and so I said no I wanted nothing to do with her as in rellationship wise but I'd stay friends with her So then recently we have been doing things basically that couples do etc and she asked me out but I said no that I couldn't trust her obviously but I do love her I just don't know wether I can trust her enough to try again She never had any intention to tell me what she had been doing and she was willing to do it with my best friend even though she knew it would kill me she lies all the time But I know she is actually a lovely person and a great friend, I am wondering what I should do and whether I should try and move on with or without her? Thanks in advance
Light Breeze Posted December 17, 2014 Posted December 17, 2014 You are both young, man.. I don't know but she'd likely cheat on you again and again. Plus, a person who doesn't show any remorse is a big No-No for me. She probably sees you as the backup plan, her fallback, because she knows you'd always be there to catch her. But, down the road when she sees another great guy, then.... IMHO, don't go out with her. There is someone lovely and steadfast out there for you. Stay strong brother
Author Andy567 Posted December 17, 2014 Author Posted December 17, 2014 She is sorry for what she's done like and I think she's grown up a lot since then but I'm not sure what to do tbh
Light Breeze Posted December 17, 2014 Posted December 17, 2014 Then you'd have to go with your gut here. However, in my opinion if you wouldn't be able to trust her then what kind of a relationship is that? Personally, I'd just cut the rotten limb and move on. But, only you know the actual depth of your feelings for her. 1
Author Andy567 Posted December 17, 2014 Author Posted December 17, 2014 I'm at a complete loss tbh but thanks I appreciate your opinion
Diezel Posted December 17, 2014 Posted December 17, 2014 she cheated on me with 3 other guys I won't say what she did but it wasn't nice and she lied about it for months and never intended to tell me. She never had any intention to tell me what she had been doing and she was willing to do it with my best friend even though she knew it would kill me she lies all the time. But I know she is actually a lovely person and a great friend. Oh yeah, she definitely sounds like a wonderful person. 2
Halcyon Posted December 17, 2014 Posted December 17, 2014 (edited) You don't need her anyone who cheats on you does not care about you. Have some self respect, you are worth more than that. I wouldn't be going near someone like that with a 40 foot pole. She is not a lovely person or your friend. Because someone who is your friend (lover) would not do that to you. It takes a special kind of cruelty, lact of respect, empathy and complete disregard for others feelings to do that to a partner you are supposedly in love with. That's only the tip of the iceberg she lied to you over and over. How do these qualities make someone lovely and a great friend...? The answer it doesn't it just makes a ****ty, mean spirited person who can't be trusted. Edited December 17, 2014 by Halcyon 1
Marco Valerio Posted December 17, 2014 Posted December 17, 2014 As they've said, shes is a big NO-NO. Never get back with a cheater, even worse when she has been cheating on you for several times. A cheater always has the option to change and be someone better, but let her be someone better for someone new. Look for someone that respects you and values you!!! 1
EgoJoe Posted December 17, 2014 Posted December 17, 2014 You're both young and have plenty of mistakes to go. You will just compound the trauma. Take back your power and be happy with yourself. Date others and don't rush into relationships. If you take her back now she won't have the opportunity to learn and grow from her actions. Tell her this and then go no contact. She will respect you for it someday. 1
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