hkl1996 Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 It's been months since I started to like her, but I don't know what to talk about with her, she is quiet towards those she aren't close with her, and I just can't bare when I see her, my mind can only think of the word "cute" and can't think of anything else, she's adorable and I can't stand it and began to neglect on my studies, she is a capricorn and after checking her horoscope online I found it very similar with her's personality, but the main thing is I can't find a way to express something which would make her smile.
Silent_Shadow Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 Well if you never chat her up, you'll never find out will you? Gotta learn to walk before you can run. You're placing the idea of her on a pedestal, stop it. She's cute and introverted, that's all you know about her--so what? Do people really still take horoscopes seriously these days?--Quite often it's just mere coincidence and really once you delve deep and learn quite a bit about a person through their actions and them communicating with you for long periods of time, you'll realize that it's fallacious to even mention horoscopes in your brain at all. Everyone is unique, and believing that all our personalities is somehow attuned to when we were born is a little too naive in my personal opinion. I mean, fate? Destiny? All cool things when in stories yet in the real world, you're going to have a very rude awakening once you do more actual detective work when it comes to people. Chat her up, chances are, she'll open her stupid ignorant mouth and make your dangalang too floppy to even wanna associate with her anymore. Yet you won't know if you never even hold a conversation with her. Start with small talk and gauge her reactions towards you, is she truly shy around you or indifferent? You both take classes together or work together chat about that. Vent about the holidays, people, family, the weather, anything. Try to gleam what interests elicit excitement from her and you can easily ramble on about that and go from there. State what you're passionate about, then listen to her prattle on what she's passionate about. If there's some common ground then, there ya go! If not and you're just endlessly grasping at straws and the interaction feels forced and she's not into you, well at least you've met a positive acquaintance, so really. You've not nothing to lose. Chances are she has a boyfriend, so crushing on her when you don't even know if she's single is rather premature and just sets up your mind for unneeded heartache. 1
Author hkl1996 Posted December 16, 2014 Author Posted December 16, 2014 Moreover, I am very nervous around girls especially her, and can't think of anything topic to start a conversation, it's been 3months and I could not have a long conversation, and most of our conversation are "hi" and "bye", the longest was about 20seconds and it ended. I never flirt before, so I have been frustrated on how to at least flirt her, but I think I am just a damn stupid idiot who don't even know how to talk to girl even on fb I only talk about studies with her but I lasted only for a few replies from her, and I get the feeling she wants to ignore me, I just can't catch up to her subject when she was telling me about the music event that's going to happen but I accidentally ignored her during that conversation and get on with the talk on studies by accident since my network is low and received her message a little late when I replied her with studies as the main topic, so now she tends to talk to me lesser compare to those conversation on fb that we had before, I wanna learn about Korean music which she is so interested in but I don't know where to start from and since I am quite stupid(my own opinion) I really don't know what to say at what situation and hate myself for that trait which I have. Finally, I can't stop liking her even though my friends all say I'm blind since the person I have crush on isn't gorgeous, but quite normal and doesn't like to go out quite much, I just got something I wanna ask in advance, should I or should I not talk to her often if we are having a group outing since my friends group and her's go out quite often recently. So, should I talk to her during the group meeting or should I talk to her when we are alone? I'm worry I would mess things up as she might think of me just as an acquaintance. And the stupidest thing I ever ask the first time I chat her on fb was " do u have boyfriend" and she say she is single, I have try sometimes to have a nice topic with her but all it ended up with talking about studies, and she is 19, while I am still 18 a year younger than her.
d0nnivain Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 Why not think of some Qs in advance so you have something to fall back on when there are lulls in the conversation. Horoscopes are meaningless in the grand scheme but they can be a source of entertainment. When you see her ask if she read her horoscope that day then look it up on line & discuss it. 1
Danda Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 Talking with her in the group setting might help you be less nervous than starting off talking to her one on one. In the group setting you can also gauge a bit how she responds to you, to help you know if you want to try to talk to her more one on one. Like do you catch her stealing glances at you? Does she smile a bit bigger when you engage her? Etc. And please don't take horoscopes seriously. I'm a Leo and mine always just lectured me on how I need to stop being so proud, mind my own business and get my **** together. I felt like whoever was writing those things must have had a Leo ex. Same with that fortune cookie business. Everyone else would get something like, "People admire your creativity," or "You will soon receive an exciting surprise from an unexpected source." Mine would always say something like, "It is better to listen than to make yourself a fool," and I'd just be like **** you fortune cookie, I didn't ask for a lecture with my egg drop soon. 1
Author hkl1996 Posted December 16, 2014 Author Posted December 16, 2014 Why not think of some Qs in advance so you have something to fall back on when there are lulls in the conversation. Horoscopes are meaningless in the grand scheme but they can be a source of entertainment. When you see her ask if she read her horoscope that day then look it up on line & discuss it. But she is very hard to talk to and I am not very talkative myself so I can't think of asking any Qs as it would be very weird for a non talkative person to be talkative all of a sudden
Author hkl1996 Posted December 16, 2014 Author Posted December 16, 2014 Talking with her in the group setting might help you be less nervous than starting off talking to her one on one. In the group setting you can also gauge a bit how she responds to you, to help you know if you want to try to talk to her more one on one. Like do you catch her stealing glances at you? Does she smile a bit bigger when you engage her? Etc. And please don't take horoscopes seriously. I'm a Leo and mine always just lectured me on how I need to stop being so proud, mind my own business and get my **** together. I felt like whoever was writing those things must have had a Leo ex. Same with that fortune cookie business. Everyone else would get something like, "People admire your creativity," or "You will soon receive an exciting surprise from an unexpected source." Mine would always say something like, "It is better to listen than to make yourself a fool," and I'd just be like **** you fortune cookie, I didn't ask for a lecture with my egg drop soon. Actually I tried to talk to her during group conversation but I wasn't quite successful as plan, but It might be too nervous for her to talk one on one as we are not very close yet, so can u teach me some ways to get closer as I'm out of ideas when it comes to romance, because this is the first time in my life
Author hkl1996 Posted December 16, 2014 Author Posted December 16, 2014 Well if you never chat her up, you'll never find out will you? Gotta learn to walk before you can run. You're placing the idea of her on a pedestal, stop it. She's cute and introverted, that's all you know about her--so what? Do people really still take horoscopes seriously these days?--Quite often it's just mere coincidence and really once you delve deep and learn quite a bit about a person through their actions and them communicating with you for long periods of time, you'll realize that it's fallacious to even mention horoscopes in your brain at all. Everyone is unique, and believing that all our personalities is somehow attuned to when we were born is a little too naive in my personal opinion. I mean, fate? Destiny? All cool things when in stories yet in the real world, you're going to have a very rude awakening once you do more actual detective work when it comes to people. Chat her up, chances are, she'll open her stupid ignorant mouth and make your dangalang too floppy to even wanna associate with her anymore. Yet you won't know if you never even hold a conversation with her. Start with small talk and gauge her reactions towards you, is she truly shy around you or indifferent? You both take classes together or work together chat about that. Vent about the holidays, people, family, the weather, anything. Try to gleam what interests elicit excitement from her and you can easily ramble on about that and go from there. State what you're passionate about, then listen to her prattle on what she's passionate about. If there's some common ground then, there ya go! If not and you're just endlessly grasping at straws and the interaction feels forced and she's not into you, well at least you've met a positive acquaintance, so really. You've not nothing to lose. Chances are she has a boyfriend, so crushing on her when you don't even know if she's single is rather premature and just sets up your mind for unneeded heartache. I can't gauge her since she is quite special in personality, and thanks for.The advice.I will try it out the gauging thing I mean.
d0nnivain Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 Try these: How are you? What did you do today? What are you doing tomorrow? What is your favorite song / book / movie? What did you want to be when you grew up? You look nice today. Where did you get that top? (then ask follow up qs about the shopping experience) 1
AVarma Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 Try these: How are you? What did you do today? What are you doing tomorrow? What is your favorite song / book / movie? What did you want to be when you grew up? You look nice today. Where did you get that top? (then ask follow up qs about the shopping experience) This just sounds like the way you would talk to normal people.
d0nnivain Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 This just sounds like the way you would talk to normal people. Of course it does. Any romantic relationship needs a foundation.
1980alence Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 Chat her up, chances are, she'll open her stupid ignorant mouth and make your dangalang too floppy to even wanna associate with her anymore. Yet you won't know if you never even hold a conversation with her. Thank you Shadow - this made my day I agree with it completely! Also the stuff about not putting her on an pedestal. Treat women like friends and equals, and talk about anything you would with anyone else (well within reason).
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