SethDamien Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 not really, i feel the occasional pain every time i see her, but i could care less anymore of how she's doing with that interloper... Just a backstory... Me and my ex live next door in an apartment and we work together... we broke up 10 months ago because i flirted with a crush online. (no physical cheating though). Im still in love with her but shes already dating our officemate. i unfriended my ex and the guy she's dating in social media... she tried to add me with a message saying: "you look so bitter, if we can't be friends, atleast let's stay friends as officemates!" i unfriended them because im doing it FOR them. its not bitterness, but my process of moving on. I dont need her photos plaguing me during my free facebook time or my alone time at home. Im trying to forget her and seeing her everyday at work is painful enough. Im not obliged either to explain why i unfriended her... so i didnt reply, i just ignored her :self cheer: i finally let go of my desperation... i didnt feel the need to reply to her texts anymore even though it was very tempting. comments in this forums also motivate me! please guys, i need fuel to keep this up... if she cant love me and respect me despite pettyness i've brought upon her, then she doesnt deserve my attention anymore. am i right?
Ieris Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 You are right, you don't need to explain yourself to anyone. Its YOUR social media account so YOU choose who you want on there. I deleted my Facebook years ago when I broke up with my ex, I just didn't want to see anything of his popping up and it helped me get over him super quick so do what you need to do! 1
Halcyon Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 Seth I'm sorry to hear you are struggling. This is a hard situation to be in still having to work and live next to her etc. I don't envy that at all. However I think in order to move on and to be able to not make the same mistakes you have to face what you did in the relationship to make it fail. Both people make mistakes in relationships but rarely do people look inwards to what they can avoid again in the future. From the way you have written it seems you are dismissive of the reason you guys broke up that it was "only emotional cheating" I can tell you first hand that behaviour can really **** people over when your partner finds out about it. You don't seem to be remorseful about what you did at least from what you have written, obviously she was quite hurt by that if she left. Are you really still in love with her or do you just miss being close to someone? Either way you absolutely do not have to be her friend if you don't want to be or anything else so you are doing good on that front. Keep it up! Your comment at the end is a little concerning why would someone want to love and respect someone who is petty towards them? You owe her nothing but at the same time she owes you nothing and I know I wouldn't be interested in someone who was petty to me. That is besides the point she is your ex and that is the way it will be this is not trying to get her back this is about moving on. 1
coolheadal Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 That strong and don't weaken over this. Blocking those you had care for on social networks is the right thing to do, because too much thought has to go into dealing with life you had with them. Either good or bad it will catch up to you in the end. If you see them in the real world you can say hi and bye. That's it no more commutation just end it there. For those who have too work with them on job then think about the job first and put whatever happen aside. If you can't do that, ask for depart transfer and explain why you are requesting one. You could tell them that your past relationship with the co-worker might interfere with your working abilities 1
Author SethDamien Posted December 16, 2014 Author Posted December 16, 2014 i agree, i dont appear as remorseful as i should be after my "emotional cheating". I admit i dated with this girl (my crush) once... But our entire conversation was all about my girlfriend. she was curious about her and i wanted to let her know about our beautiful yet messy relationship. Maybe its because of this "date" i didn't feel i really cheated on my gf. This is not justification though. i still lied to my ex, and i lost her trust.
Author SethDamien Posted December 16, 2014 Author Posted December 16, 2014 From the way you have written it seems you are dismissive of the reason you guys broke up that it was "only emotional cheating" I can tell you first hand that behaviour can really **** people over when your partner finds out about it. You don't seem to be remorseful about what you did at least from what you have written, obviously she was quite hurt by that if she left. Are you really still in love with her or do you just miss being close to someone? Either way you absolutely do not have to be her friend if you don't want to be or anything else so you are doing good on that front. Keep it up! i agree, i dont appear as remorseful as i should be after my "emotional cheating". I admit i dated with this girl (my crush) once... But our entire conversation was all about my girlfriend. she was curious about her and i wanted to let her know about our beautiful yet messy relationship. Maybe its because of this "date" i didn't feel i really cheated on my gf. This is not justification though. i still lied to my ex, and i lost her trust.
BC1980 Posted December 16, 2014 Posted December 16, 2014 You are not required to keep an ex on FB or to explain why you removed the ex from FB. Quite frankly, the reason should be self-explanatory. I can certainly empathize with that it's like to work with an ex. My ex works in the same building as me, and, though our interactions are infrequent, it keeps him relevant to my life when I wish he weren't. It's just kind of difficult to move on completely when your ex is always lurking in the background. I've thought about switching jobs, but I really like my job. I love the people I work with and am friends with some of them outside of work. A few gave me great support when I was going through the worst of my breakup. My boss basically lets us self-schedule. It's honestly like a dream job in my field, but I always feel like I'm "on alert" for any possible run ins with the ex.
Recommended Posts