emotionsmessmeup Posted March 22, 2005 Posted March 22, 2005 ok...i think it just boosts this mans ego when i cry... i think he loves to get angry on me and watch oh she is sitting there and taking it. I didnt contact him since saturday.... and then today..his brother was online...and asked if i could call and ask him to come online.. so i did..and we spoke and he sounded so happy and he said i sounded normal. and then i well weak and i left him an online message saying...do you miss me.. and he screamed at me.....and said oh u started your bull **** again and blah and blah.. dont u see we cant be together...we fight all the time.. the longest we can be togetehr is for 5 mins. i said what is wrong with u.. we had this huge argument and i cried.... and he says..ppl have normal break ups..i dont know you are dragging this one... i dont know... anyways i promised him i wont call... but i just dont get it........... i told him i hate him...he says i hope u do..maybe it will help u.. i dont know... i was so happy and then...this... he says we CANNOT be TOGETHER i dont know man.... where and what did i do wrong.. I hope he never calls me again. I hope we neevr come across each other. and if he does call me..I will tell him I am seeing someone...
brashgal Posted March 22, 2005 Posted March 22, 2005 Pretty psycho. This is why NC is necessary - you need to protect yourself from this abuse.
haywood Posted March 22, 2005 Posted March 22, 2005 please try your best to not even talk to him or his brother or anyone that knows him. everything you do will only solidfy his decision to not want something with you. i suggest you erase any info you have of him. erase his numbers, his screen names. this will help you move on. i know you can do it. anytime you want to call him, call a friend instead. trust me, this helps. good luck
CurlyIam Posted March 22, 2005 Posted March 22, 2005 I am sorry, emotions, I really don't want to hurt you, but Iwill tell you exactly what I think. You kniw I've supported you since the beginning, but the man told you off every time you tried to get intouch with him. I know 6 years is a lot, but just because you slept with someone else doesn't mean you're over him or that you're even or anything. I think you may have developped an obsession for him, because you just don't understand that he doesn't want you. I think that maybe you should consider talking to a professional about what you're going through. It's just not sane, my friend. You are not alright. This is beyond talking to a friend. Do you realise that you're almost harassing him? I know you don't want to hear this and I do think that talking about this does worlds of good to you. But not as nearly as much as a professionals advice. You are not alright. A normal person would be crying and kicking and screaming and actually confronting the fact that he's leaving. Emotions, you don't get it. You are calm. See what I mean? Tell me if I'm way off base. Tell me what you think of what I've just told you. Hugs, Curly
d'Arthez Posted March 22, 2005 Posted March 22, 2005 Sadly I have to agree with CurlyIam. You are driving your ex-bf insane. He has broken up with you, because he does not want to be with you. For whatever reasons he may have, he does not want to be with you. You seem somewhat unable to grasp that. Things and people change, and that is not something we have total control over. And because you can't keep up NC, he is getting more and more hostile. He is trying to move on himself too. Accept that. I remember your 'should I have sex with FWB' thread, and you seemed very confused about things, feelings and what you should do. A f*ck is just a f*ck, nothing more and nothing less. It makes you forget the emotional pains of a relationship for maybe an hour afterwards, and if it was really good, a quarter of a day. But they don't vanish as if through a spell. The best thing is to keep up NC, for your own sanity, and consider professional assistance with your issues. They seem very severe, and there is no need why a 23(?)-year old girl should waste her life because of a failed relationship. Best wishes to you
greenhorn Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 EMMU, allow me to be a bit harsh. Of late I have been not replying to your thread cause I really don't know what to reply.One day you will come and say that you have broken off and you are doing NC it is something like 37 hours and going...you are getting urges and we all would suggest you to maintain NC but next day we get to know that you again talked and got hurt.What is this, NC means NO CONTACT. The duration does not matter, if it is life long , 6 years, 7 year or 7 days if it ends then it just ENDS.The ending is never different.If it makes you feel better then mine ended after 7 years and the day she dumped me I haven't talked to her (going to be 4 months).Everyone does feel pain and everyone gets hurt.I still see her in my dreams every night but you got to accept it that it is OVER.Nothing is left now, your relationships is over and now it is stinking. I am sure one day you would come out of it and then when you look back you will find it silly how you were clinging to it. So just maintain NC and I am sure you won't maintain it. P.S. Sorry to be rude but I am honest.
Author emotionsmessmeup Posted March 23, 2005 Author Posted March 23, 2005 he called and apologized for his behaviour. I dont get it. He said he wanted to talk once in 2-3 days and he would call. At that point I said ok....but then i logged on to LS. But I just texted and said...."I am sorry I cant talk to u, Not till I am over u..There is no point. I am just trying to protect myself." I am going for professional counselling this friday. I know I need it.
Author emotionsmessmeup Posted March 23, 2005 Author Posted March 23, 2005 I did scream and cry. No I am not calm. I called him, tortured him , questioned him. questioned myself... the things I DID! I did them though....
greenhorn Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 If you say " I don't get it " I would reply why you wanna get it ?? Just move on and maintain NC. Things are hard but if you can then do NC or else you would always be crying .
Lonestar Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 Go away. You're not wanted there. Why stick around where you're not wanted. You're allowing him to treat you the way he does. If you go back for more, it's your own fault. Lick your wounds, and move the f*ck on. This is coming from experience. BTDT. It's not pretty on the self-esteem.
beejsea2 Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 I'm glad to see that you're going in for counseling. I think that you're in denial that your ex left you and you can't seem to grasp his reasonings. But you have to stop ALL contact with him until you are healthy enough to talk to him without falling about. It's a rough road but there are people here on LS to help you through all of this!
acidrein_08 Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 From the replys I believe everyone has made it clear that he had a reason to be hostile. Asking him if he misses you after he has made it CLEAR that he doesn't want anything to do with you is just a big mistake on your part. He doesn't feel anything for you anymore and you are lingering on hopes that he does or that maybe it can still work but let me tell you the relationship you had with this person is over. Even if you get back together things will be the same and you will argue all the time becuase he doesn't LOVE you! Now stop harassing him, calling, texting, thinking about him at all becuase there aren't enough days in life to waste. Get out and have fun, find some new friends! I hope you start feeling better, God Bless.
Lonestar Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 Originally posted by acidrein_08 From the replys I believe everyone has made it clear that he had a reason to be hostile. Asking him if he misses you after he has made it CLEAR that he doesn't want anything to do with you is just a big mistake on your part. He doesn't feel anything for you anymore and you are lingering on hopes that he does or that maybe it can still work but let me tell you the relationship you had with this person is over. Even if you get back together things will be the same and you will argue all the time becuase he doesn't LOVE you! Now stop harassing him, calling, texting, thinking about him at all becuase there aren't enough days in life to waste. Get out and have fun, find some new friends! I hope you start feeling better, God Bless. Acid is right. Look... we're all guilty of hanging on to something that's not ours at one point of another. It's hard to let go sometimes, and hard to face the unknown. People want to hang on to the evil they know, but it doesn't work.
blind_otter Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 Just leave it alone. Leave him alone. Forget the relationship. Let it go. You are starting to act just as psycho as he claims that you are. LET IT GO. This is crazy, man. You don't need this bullsh*t.
Merin Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 Originally posted by blind_otter Just leave it alone. Leave him alone. Forget the relationship. Let it go. You are starting to act just as psycho as he claims that you are. LET IT GO. This is crazy, man. You don't need this bullsh*t. Agree 110% You've been posting about this situation for awhile now.. and while thats okay and hopefully you got some useful advice and it's made you feel better, the advice thats been given regarding this since you've been having problems has always been the same.. LEAVE HIM ALONE. There isn't really any other way to put it.. he isn't interested, he isn't down for it and at this point it doesn't even matter why.
whichwayisup Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 I agree with everybody else. Just take to heart that there were feelings there at one time...But now he's moved on and so must you. IF you don't you're gonna be even more miserable and obessed with him. He is calling you because now he knows how to push your buttons...Don't answer his calls, block him on your IM and see a therapist to help you cope through this. It will take time, we've all been dumped at one point in our life and not ready to let go...For you, you must let go and do it fast. Like quitting smoking! Just DO it. He isn't good for you! Get busy, hang out with friends, enjoy the things you love to do ; hobbies, movies, exercise - Whatever. Just keep busy and spend less time online so HE can't contact you. Good luck.
Author emotionsmessmeup Posted March 24, 2005 Author Posted March 24, 2005 hello everyone... just updating... havent spoken since.. wont speak... wont wont wont i dotn wanna be with him... even if decides to come back now, its too late.... even my shoe wont go back to him!
CurlyIam Posted March 24, 2005 Posted March 24, 2005 Your shoe is very right! (btw, who was the little traitor, the left or the right?)
Author emotionsmessmeup Posted March 25, 2005 Author Posted March 25, 2005 Update - He called twice last evening at 7. I ignored the phone calls.
greenhorn Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 That's exactly what you should be doing..better late than never... BTW don't you think not letting even your shoe to go to him is bit too harsh never mind ..just kidding Happy Holi
Author emotionsmessmeup Posted March 25, 2005 Author Posted March 25, 2005 sorry..i got expensive shoes.. dont want them hurt/ruined or mishandled..
greenhorn Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Originally posted by emotionsmessmeup sorry..i got expensive shoes.. dont want them hurt/ruined or mishandled.. Lol at this rate I see your ex coming to LS for getting help " Help someone not sending her shoes to me "..atleast you can pass the link of LS to him..will save him some googling...
Author emotionsmessmeup Posted March 27, 2005 Author Posted March 27, 2005 Update: NC NC NC! No calls...not returned...NC NC i can do it...those are my initials hey!
greenhorn Posted March 27, 2005 Posted March 27, 2005 Originally posted by emotionsmessmeup Update: NC NC NC! No calls...not returned...NC NC i can do it...those are my initials hey! Good Lady, keep it up
CurlyIam Posted March 27, 2005 Posted March 27, 2005 My female prides take great joy in hearing he called and got the silence treatment! Good for you. This guy isn't all together in his head and is messing up yours too. Each time you feel the urge to contact him, write another post here. That should keep your mind off it!
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