Chin Up Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 I had met my ex through work. He worked there for years but last year decided not to to pursue the part time position he normally took there for the extra money. I'm hoping he doesn't come back this spring . Anyways, A lot of the members know him and knew of our relationship. One came in today that I hadn't seen for a while. We caught up a little and then he asked "so how's ex?" and I went blank because I honestly hadn't planned, let alone thought of these kind of conversations that will be happening now that members are returning to the facility. I said "beats me! we broke up haha" in a jokingly indifferent way. He asked what happened (inappropriate if you ask me) and I said, again in a joking and blase way.. "We wanted different things. I wanted a relationship, he didn't. haha!" We both laughed and I'm pretty sure I came off as totally fine and over it, which I am for the most part..but.. I know a lot of members are going to be asking about him, and that this conversation will crop up more times than I'd like to have. So awkward. Did I handle that well or should I have worded things differently?
Ronni_W Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 You handled it perfectly! (Congrats!) The awkwardness was only within yourself...not felt by the person with whom you were speaking. (Not sure if it helps or not, to know that.) But, point is that you did not let on your own, or cause any additional, 'awkwardness'. You could turn future such encounters into a game with yourself. "How many ways can I find to give people these same facts?" or, "How many times today will I get asked this same question?" (And then, if you 'win' your 'contest', treat yourself to something nice...a bubble-bath, or new car or manicure or pair of shoes, or whatever .) 1
Author Chin Up Posted December 15, 2014 Author Posted December 15, 2014 (edited) Thanks Ronni, It threw me for a loop because not only had I not thought about him all day (yeah!) but it never occurred to me that this situation was bound to come up. I didn't have to put on much of an act of being ok and happy, but being caught of guard made my guts turn for a minute because I didn't want to say anything that could make me look bad or like I was smearing him. I was also a little rattled after because I realized he keeps in touch with some of the members so some of them will already know. Either way, what I say and how I act can get back to him so I have to be on my toes. Breakups = One thing after another lol. Edited December 15, 2014 by Chin Up
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