Septemberblue Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 Disclaimer: I know that looking at my past post that I really shouldn't want to be with him any way but I'm in love with him. This is my first love so I feel like letting go will kill me. I been having a rocky relationship with a man for 4 months now and just last week everything came to a head. I couldn't take the wondering of if he wanted a relationship with me and I got in too deep. I started asking questions and things went crazy. He's a texter so luckily some of our interactions are in text. Here are the text the started the downward spiral. TEXT 1 TEXT 2 TEXT 3 TEXT 4 I let it go after that and three days later he calls me to hang out. I said sure and he comes over and he's VERY affectionate with me all of a sudden. I didn't know what to think. Yes, we had sex and the sex was more affectionate as well. At first I thought we was affectionate at just for the sex but way be so affectionate if he's already getting the sex? You already got what you wanted. He was even being sweet to me AFTER the sex. I went into more detail in this post Five days later I texted him to see how his finals we coming along and I just couldn't take it any more. Newest batch of messages... TEXT 1 TEXT 2 TEXT 3 TEXT 4 TEXT 5 I'm so scared that I lost him for good this time and there is no coming back for it. Is there anyway I can fix this?
Dontfindme Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 Clearly you're more emotionally invested than he is. It doesn't seem like he's invested at all. Leave him be. Find someone else. I know this isn't what you want to hear - but the more you drag this out, the more you will be torturing yourself. 3
Ducktape Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 Can't lose something you never had! Sorry, it's for the best and you know it! 1
Halcyon Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 (edited) Septemberblue, I'm sorry this is well and truly in the grave there is nothing to salvage here. He could not be any less interested, you need to cut off all contact and move on with your life. I promise with time you will feel better and you will find someone else, someone who loves you for who you are. This person is not that person and obsessing over something that will never be is going to make you sick. Please don't pretend to be friends, you don't want to be friends be honest. You want to hang around in any way you can hoping he will see the light and suddenly fall for you. You are coming across as needy and desperate and this guy is fleeing because of it. Honestly I've been in his shoes where I had broken something off and had the person texting me for 6 months after I stopped replying, it was actually kinda really scary after a while. Don't be that person, accept reality and move on. Edited December 15, 2014 by Halcyon 2
Elle1975 Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 "Cool"? That's his answer? Write him off, and rebuild your ego, because still being after this jerk after his "cool" is just madness. 2
Satu Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 I'm so scared that I lost him for good this time and there is no coming back for it. Is there anyway I can fix this? You can fix it by realising that you deserve much more than you could ever get from this person.
Ieris Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Wow, this is exactly what I went through and broke it off 2 weeks ago. The guy kept gunning down his ex yet still kept intimate pictures of them on his phone. He is just using you as a rebound. I know it hurts but move on... there is nothing to save. Nothing you can do if he is still in love with someone else. Find someone who is ready and completely focused on you *HuGs* x 1
Author Septemberblue Posted December 15, 2014 Author Posted December 15, 2014 Just wanted to say that it's over. I sent him a good by email and I'm done now. I was thinking last night after I started this post and I came to the realization that he never gave me anything to fix. The entire time I've known him I never got one good night of sleep. I worried about what would happen next in this "relationship". Finally my dad called me and said "Get over him right now baby girl. I know you wanted it to work but you can't spend another weekend like this." When my dad speaks I listen so I'm coming back to the land of the living. Thanks everybody. 1
Satu Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Good for you. You'll get over him and move on to something better.
Author Septemberblue Posted December 19, 2014 Author Posted December 19, 2014 Okay so, like I said, I sent him a closure letter on Monday. Yesterday he replied back... "I'm really sorry that I've caused you to feel so bad. It was never my intention to hurt you, I promise. I know now that I need to take some time to myself and get over some things and do some work. It's been a few days since I've read the email below and I don't think I need to really address it anyway -- that's not how I think this thing needs to be worked through." That was really nice of him. A LOT better than "cool". lol My dad read this and he thinks that he's going to come calling again. I don't know about all that.
Author Septemberblue Posted December 21, 2014 Author Posted December 21, 2014 Here a little update on the situation I have. Like I've said before I sent him a closure letter and he sent me a note back apologizing for all that happened. He put something in his note that's kinda throwing me off... It's been a few days since I've read the email below and I don't think I need to really address it anyway -- that's not how I think this thing needs to be worked through. I'm like WTF do we need to "work through"? I having talked to him in a week so I don't know what that could mean. And don't even get me started on "I don't think I need to really address it anyway". That's so typical of him to run from an emotional situation. That's probably why that other girl left him and never came back. I met someone new (It didn't work out) and he introduced me to a app called "whatsapp". I didn't know anything about it so I downloaded it on my phone and would you believe it, there was my ex. He had some quote in Swahili as is status which I'm pretty sure was for his ex-girlfriend (She's from Kenya). I was being petty and changed my status to a quote from the letter that I sent him. He had his status up for 2 weeks before I came along and as soon as I put mine up he deletes his. So I feel that some Petty Betty crap is about to start so I'm going to delete that app.
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