Author johnissad Posted December 14, 2014 Author Posted December 14, 2014 She just sent me a message 'I'm on my way out. How about 10pm?' So...if I cancel...do I just not reply? I feel kind of foolish now since I told her yesterday via text we can talk sometime. Hmmmmm.... How do I bow out and leave her wondering...
movingonnow1 Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 She just sent me a message 'I'm on my way out. How about 10pm?' So...if I cancel...do I just not reply? I feel kind of foolish now since I told her yesterday via text we can talk sometime. Hmmmmm.... How do I bow out and leave her wondering... I agree with everything Lauri has been saying. Cancel on her..but do it for yourself. You shouldn't worry about leaving her wondering as she is with another guy. She is probably busy until that time as she is probably hanging around him at this very moment. My suggestion is don't even respond to her message. Ignore it, don't pick up and go NC. That will show you are strong, you don't need validation from her or even care about what she has to say. This whole situation favours her only and the only thing you can do is do what you should've a long time ago, cut her off. Want to know the best part about doing it this way? It'll make her wonder a lot more than you sitting there listening to her or having anything to say at all. It shows strength...best of luck.
Author johnissad Posted December 14, 2014 Author Posted December 14, 2014 So...just ignore her last message? No response...go NC?
movingonnow1 Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 So...just ignore her last message? No response...go NC? Exactly. I did that and it drove my ex insane...she couldn't believe the man she dumped actually turned into a man. For so long I let her have upper hand, but after learning about the new guy, I finally snapped into my sences. I was only benefting her. But I didn't do it to get back at her, I did it to protect myself all my meeting with my ex was going to serve her interest and completely disregard what I felt. You want to walk away from this in control man..don't give her it, she doesn't deserve it. I'm 99.9% she cheated on you..why do you want to BENEFIT her at YOUR expense? You don't. You're walking away from this with her your self respect and dignity man...don't do what a lot of us have done before.
lauri Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 Yes, that's exactly what you do. You walk away from this and don't look back. It'll be hard but you gotta put yourself first man.
Author johnissad Posted December 14, 2014 Author Posted December 14, 2014 I know. She goes from saying the most intimate things to me 11/1. Then a month later its over and she won't meet even meet me..never picked up the phone to talk to me. And this is what I received from her when I tried to reach out: Hey, I have been thinking and I don’t think it is a good idea to meet. We are at 2 different places for sure. In the past few weeks I have re-connected with someone. I will always be your friend, just like you said, and I am always willing to offer input when it comes to the girls and their mental health needs. You know that! Take good care, Susan
HurtGator Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 I know. She goes from saying the most intimate things to me 11/1. Then a month later its over and she won't meet even meet me..never picked up the phone to talk to me. And this is what I received from her when I tried to reach out: Hey, I have been thinking and I don’t think it is a good idea to meet. We are at 2 different places for sure. In the past few weeks I have re-connected with someone. I will always be your friend, just like you said, and I am always willing to offer input when it comes to the girls and their mental health needs. You know that! Take good care, Susan Dude... listen... she's a player, unreliable, emotionally cheated on you, and isn't marriage or LTR material. Consider yourself lucky! 1
lauri Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 I know. She goes from saying the most intimate things to me 11/1. Then a month later its over and she won't meet even meet me..never picked up the phone to talk to me. And this is what I received from her when I tried to reach out: Hey, I have been thinking and I don’t think it is a good idea to meet. We are at 2 different places for sure. In the past few weeks I have re-connected with someone. I will always be your friend, just like you said, and I am always willing to offer input when it comes to the girls and their mental health needs. You know that! Take good care, Susan Why were you going to even talk to her man? She wants to talk to you to get the upper hand on you and ease her guilt. After seeing this, don't even respond to her man. Its not worth giving her any attention...trust me. You already know this you were just hoping to hear otherwise it seems. 1
HurtGator Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 Why were you going to even talk to her man? She wants to talk to you to get the upper hand on you and ease her guilt. After seeing this, don't even respond to her man. Its not worth giving her any attention...trust me. You already know this you were just hoping to hear otherwise it seems. I agree. If you don't bother even giving her any attention, she will start second guessing her choices. 1
Author johnissad Posted December 15, 2014 Author Posted December 15, 2014 Its done. I sent her this email. I know I shouldn't have...but I needed too. For ME!! And now...NC You almost had me with that 'your not the only one hurting too' text yesterday. I've confided in a close friend last night and today. He has opened my eyes...I have new perspective on things. We were together the morning of my birthday...and you said the most intimate loving thing to me...how you feel more comfortable being with me than with any other man. Then a month later I get this: Hey, I have been thinking and I don’t think it is a good idea to meet. We are at 2 different places for sure. In the past few weeks I have re-connected with someone. I will always be your friend, just like you said, and I am always willing to offer input when it comes to the girls and their mental health needs. You know that! Take good care, Susan Just like that. Everything is perfectly clear to me now.
Author johnissad Posted December 15, 2014 Author Posted December 15, 2014 Ha. She just texted me. What was that email all about? You think I cheated on you? Uh....ya. (i didn't sent that to her...just sayin...lol)
lauri Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Ha. She just texted me. What was that email all about? You think I cheated on you? Uh....ya. (i didn't sent that to her...just sayin...lol) Dude, you should have never sent her that email. Shows you're weak and influenced by others. Silence would've been 10x more powerful.
Author johnissad Posted December 15, 2014 Author Posted December 15, 2014 Maybe. Or...I let my feelings for her blind me to the truth and I needed a good friend to open my eyes. She hasn't stopped sending emails or texts since. Last two emaisl from her: So you don't want to talk? So? Shows you how clueless she is.
lauri Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 Maybe. Or...I let my feelings for her blind me to the truth and I needed a good friend to open my eyes. She hasn't stopped sending emails or texts since. Last two emaisl from her: So you don't want to talk? So? Shows you how clueless she is. Stick to NC. Dont respond.
Author johnissad Posted December 15, 2014 Author Posted December 15, 2014 I am. The emails and texts will not stop. NC until I hear or see the right words. I love you...I'm sorry...I didn't cheat...please talk to me.
Halcyon Posted December 15, 2014 Posted December 15, 2014 How about you block her email if your serious about NC. Why are you even entertaining this? Do you not have any self respect? Why would you even consider being with someone like that again. See it as dodging a bullet and move on, stop playing games, it's not healthy.
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