greenman77 Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 I am very inexperienced when it comes to dating and even more so when it comes to kissing so I was wondering if anyone knows of a good site or video to help improve my kissing? I finally kissed a girl I have been going out with for over a month yesterday and we had a long make out session and I'm pretty sure I wasn't great at it and want to improve. Can anyone help me out? Thanks in advanced.
GemmaUK Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 Ask her for training. Let her lead. Remember it and do the same next time/s. My first kiss was with an awesome kisser. I teach all who I have dated - not one complaint so far - just a lot of um...excitement.. Be a great guy and remember it though. I had to re-teach..and with some guys got bored of re-teaching.... 1
sillyanswer Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 I am very inexperienced when it comes to dating and even more so when it comes to kissing so I was wondering if anyone knows of a good site or video to help improve my kissing? No such thing, although I'm sure there are sites claiming to be. I finally kissed a girl I have been going out with for over a month yesterday and we had a long make out session and I'm pretty sure I wasn't great at it and want to improve. Can anyone help me out? Thanks in advanced. You have a willing partner... that'll be 1000 times better than any website can teach you. One thing to keep in mind for the future, unless this is your one and only partner for life, is that not everybody likes kissing to be the same. While there might be some common basics there's also plenty of variety in what people do and like. So, while you're learning what this girl likes, don't assume that a future partner will be exactly the same. (This is just one reason why there are no good sites telling you how to be a good kisser.) 1
Phoe Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 Don't shove your tongue as deep into her mouth as you can! Every boyfriend I ever had did this and it's the reason I don't like making out lol. I avoid it now because I don't want to gag on someone's tongue. 1
Author greenman77 Posted December 13, 2014 Author Posted December 13, 2014 Thanks for the help guys! I really appreciate it
Danda Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 Well first of all you want to be relaxed. Your jaw/neck muscles should be totally relaxed and there should only be a little tension in your lips/mouth, like just enough to actually move at all. If you get anxious and are super rigid/tense it will be weird. Best way to relax into it is to focus on kissing near the mouth for a bit before mouth/mouth kissing. Not only will this be sensual and hot for your lady, but it will also let you relax more and get into a more natural motion, so to speak. You can start by kissing lightly on her shoulder, then light/slow on her neck, harder/slow as you work up to below her ear, kiss along her jaw line, her cheek bones, then closer to her mouth until you actually lock lips. **There is no need to go straight for her mouth right off the bat.** By the time you do get to her mouth, the two of you (and especially you) should have relaxed considerably muscle-wise and gotten more into natural motion. At this point it's about taking it slow, playful and enjoying the way stuff feels. Don't be thinking in terms of 'performance' and ****. Slowly try stuff out.. lower lip, upper lip, very gentle sucking on a lip, etc. Give this phase some time before you start thinking tongue action, unless she initiates tongue action first. For tongue action: Remember slow is still good at this point. You can try 'inviting' first by opening your mouth and forming a bit of a suction, maybe flick a bit with your tongue as if to say "come hither". This is usually the best way to get a woman to relax, herself, about some tongue action, rather than trying to deep throat her with your own tongue without much or any warning. If it's slow to escalate and kind of playful/teasing, that's not "doing it wrong", that's great. A little bit of very gentle teeth action or sucking on the tongue can be stimulating in a good way. If you actually go slow and are playful, like you are exploring, it will wind up being a natural-feeling thing and not some awkward performance. Good luck, solider. 1
carhill Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 I'll leave the ladies to provide the specific techniques but can share a couple things as a man which I've learned over the decades. Yes, kissing is lips but the process is mind, body and soul. It is embrace and desire. Feeling that desire and passion and being transparent about that goes a long ways to a successful outcome. Become aware of how your body feels and how your body language is presented to your partner. We as men tend to focus on specifics, like our lips, our hands, our penis, where women tend to have a more overall sense of contact. If you're not 'all in', she can often perceive that. 'All-in' can come from many places, both personal and interaction-related, but it's the sensitivity to it that counts. Lastly, practice and communication help! It's OK if you get it wrong! Simply learn and try different things and remember that kissing is a means of expressing love and intimacy, not a contest to see who's best! Good luck! 1
unforgotten Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 You can start by kissing lightly on her shoulder, then light/slow on her neck, harder/slow as you work up to below her ear, kiss along her jaw line, her cheek bones, then closer to her mouth until you actually lock lips. You're giving me serious boner.
Danda Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 Oh and watch the saliva! When babies and puppies drool on us, it's okay, but that's about it. Occasionally someone likes wet/sloppy but it's sort of a 'thing' and not the norm, I think. 1
carhill Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 Oh and watch the saliva! When babies and puppies drool on us, it's okay, but that's about it. Occasionally someone likes wet/sloppy but it's sort of a 'thing' and not the norm, I think. Ha, had to laugh since I had about as much Pavlov's response to women's lips as I did to a juicy burger fresh off the grill. You're right though, watch that drool!
Author greenman77 Posted December 13, 2014 Author Posted December 13, 2014 Great stuff guys thanks a lot!
most_distant_galaxy Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 I am very inexperienced when it comes to dating and even more so when it comes to kissing so I was wondering if anyone knows of a good site or video to help improve my kissing? I finally kissed a girl I have been going out with for over a month yesterday and we had a long make out session and I'm pretty sure I wasn't great at it and want to improve. Can anyone help me out? Thanks in advanced. I will describe the best kiss I ever had.. with a man I wasn't into that much, but oh boy, do I remember the way he kisses... I was so amazed that I copied his moves on the next people I dated. I regret not having sex with him, I am sure he would be a great lover. That's how he kissed: He held my face in his hands and started kissing my lips softly. Now and then he would lick my tongue very gently and then my lips, very slightly. Also, he would bite my lips very gently. 1
Dallers Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 (edited) It is all about the pace OP. Go slow. I know people say let her lead but trust me if you want to be the man in her life you MUST lead the kiss. It all comes down to the same thing every girl looks for in a kiss and that is manliness, passion and confidence. It is an area which I adore and can easily spend 20-30 minutes kissing before leading to the bedroom. Master it and she will love you for it. When you go in for the kiss she has to feel it if she feels nothing it is a pointless act. Preparation for a kiss is so very important. - Slow Approach - Eye Contact - Glance at her lips - Back to her eyes - Place hands on around her cheeks and face slowly and gently - Firm up your hands as you approach and tilt your head slightly The Kiss - Do not use tongue to begin with just let your lips meld into hers while gently moving them as you literally "Kiss" - Break away and shift to the other side and then take things up a notch. - Use tongue sparingly and only enter as far as touching her tongue. - Use a stroking motion into her lips as you touch her tongue - At this point you are free to lead from there. - If it is a first kiss or a public kiss always end the kiss with a final peck. It just finalises what just happened. Kissssssssss - break - eye contact - peck. Win. Advanced Moves - A couple of things I like doing - When you have your hands on her face move one hand to her ear. Stroke that ear lobe my friend. - Depending on the situation remember the manliness thing, become firmer, stronger, rougher and more passionate with your kissing. Don't be the delicate guy unless it is a delicate moment. - Neck kisses are without doubt killers - Switch from neck to lips - Gently nibbling is something to be mastered, one for the alone time and must be done correctly, gently and you must not bite. The rest I take to the grave with me. Edited December 13, 2014 by Dallers 4
Frank2thepoint Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 I recommend practicing on a ripe pear. I'm serious. If you eat it too fast, pieces of it will get all over your mouth. You have take it slow, with some lite tongue action, as you lap the pear into you mouth. Sounds sexual, but that's what kissing eventually leads to. 1
Author greenman77 Posted December 14, 2014 Author Posted December 14, 2014 Really appreciate the help! Thank you all!
sillyanswer Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 It is all about the pace OP. Go slow. I know people say let her lead but trust me if you want to be the man in her life you MUST lead the kiss. It all comes down to the same thing every girl looks for in a kiss and that is manliness, passion and confidence. It is an area which I adore and can easily spend 20-30 minutes kissing before leading to the bedroom. Master it and she will love you for it. When you go in for the kiss she has to feel it if she feels nothing it is a pointless act. Preparation for a kiss is so very important. - Slow Approach - Eye Contact - Glance at her lips - Back to her eyes - Place hands on around her cheeks and face slowly and gently - Firm up your hands as you approach and tilt your head slightly The Kiss - Do not use tongue to begin with just let your lips meld into hers while gently moving them as you literally "Kiss" - Break away and shift to the other side and then take things up a notch. - Use tongue sparingly and only enter as far as touching her tongue. - Use a stroking motion into her lips as you touch her tongue - At this point you are free to lead from there. - If it is a first kiss or a public kiss always end the kiss with a final peck. It just finalises what just happened. Kissssssssss - break - eye contact - peck. Win. Advanced Moves - A couple of things I like doing - When you have your hands on her face move one hand to her ear. Stroke that ear lobe my friend. - Depending on the situation remember the manliness thing, become firmer, stronger, rougher and more passionate with your kissing. Don't be the delicate guy unless it is a delicate moment. - Neck kisses are without doubt killers - Switch from neck to lips - Gently nibbling is something to be mastered, one for the alone time and must be done correctly, gently and you must not bite. The rest I take to the grave with me. I'm slightly concerned that a beginner trying to memorise this and then follow it is going to screw up badly. It sounds great, but it seems very complicated.
sillyanswer Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 While there might be some common basics I'll mention one of them: oral hygiene. Keep on top of this! While you may find a partner who will put up with coffee/onion/garlic/beer breath and even morning-after-the-night-before breath when they are in the same situation it'll be rare to find someone who prefers these things over minty fresh. 1
Gloria25 Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 On top of the great advice given so far, I say "watch". I prefer learning by demonstration and I can watch porn and stuff and pretty much replicate what I've learned by watching. I saw a Sex and the City once with the "bad kisser" and you could tell from a mile that everything he did was wrong.
Dallers Posted December 14, 2014 Posted December 14, 2014 I'm slightly concerned that a beginner trying to memorise this and then follow it is going to screw up badly. It sounds great, but it seems very complicated. There is nothing complicated at all. Thinking too much is the number 1 problem. 1
Author greenman77 Posted December 14, 2014 Author Posted December 14, 2014 On top of the great advice given so far, I say "watch". I prefer learning by demonstration and I can watch porn and stuff and pretty much replicate what I've learned by watching. I saw a Sex and the City once with the "bad kisser" and you could tell from a mile that everything he did was wrong. That's a great idea! I've been watching very closely when ever I see a kiss scene on TV or a movie.
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