michaelsark Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 m 18 years old and i was with this girl for 3 months. At first she seemed very into me and she started texting me all the time, after a week of us texting she invited me to go to the mall, but her brother was with her which was a bit weird. i could only see her once a week and after talking to her for 3 weeks she said she loved me. So everything went very well after that i felt like i had strong feelings for this girl and this is my first relationship. Then she said shes been hurt before and she doesn't know what love even is but i showed her what it is and how im the perfect guy and everything and how im the best thing that ever happened to her and that i was the most important person in her life. we started talking dirty after a month and texted everyday and about after 2 months i noticed she texted me less and less and came up with excuses. And she also stopped talking dirty and she was always the one to want to talk dirty. Then after that i noticed when i went with her she seemed cranky that i was there, so i didn't really think anything of it. Then 2 weeks ago she invited me to go to the movies but she invited another guy and bought his movie and food. and i said i would buy her food but she just looked at me and didn't say anything and i thought that was ignorant. so i asked her if she was losing interest because she hasn't been texting me that but she said no ive been busy with work lately. So when i went home we talked for a bit and the next day she said morning and never texted me for a week then she finally texted me and said sorry ive been sick and sleep lately. i said okay i love u and she said i love you too. so i didn't text her for a week to see if she would notice and she didn't..... so i texted her and said can i call you? and she said im doing stuff right now. then i said why does it seem like your always busy when i want to talk to you? and she said look i can't do this anymore, whatever it is. Im very confused and am wondering where things went wrong. Did i screw up? how could someone walk out of your life like that and she deleted me on facebook. Im so hurt
Light Breeze Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 I'm sorry to hear what happened to your relationship. However, know that you are not alone and many of us here can relate to your pain. The loss of a first love is devastating, but, you can get through this and it will be better. I'll try my best to give you my honest opinion. To answer your question on why your GF left you, there maybe two reasons. First, I'm sorry to say that it looks like you've been cheated on. Either there was someone new or you were a rebound and she went back to her Ex. BTW who was that guy she brought with her at the movies? From experience a sure sign of your partner cheating is if she suddenly goes cold to you without any major issues or fighting. Second, she's not that in to you. You and your ex are at an age where falling in love is often confused with infatuation. Maybe, she found some quirks in your personality that in her mind were flaws and might have been the reason to "fall out of love" or lose her attraction to you. Infatuation is that fickle.. My advice is to is to heal and learn lessons from this experience. Grieve and feel the pain. Take it one day at a time and be comforted by the fact that you will be BETTER. You will be stronger and mature at the end of this and this will give you a new perspective in your future relationship. Follow the NO CONTACT route. Do not in anyway contact her or reply to her or talk to her unless she says she is sorry and wants you back (and also the real reason for her behavior.. If she cheated, then you are better off without her). Doing NC will make your healing moving on much smoother and faster. Good luck brother and stay strong. 2
Author michaelsark Posted December 13, 2014 Author Posted December 13, 2014 this guy she invited she met not to long ago, when i was with her about a month ago i noticed she was texting that guy and tilting her phone so i couldn't see it, I'm not sure what was going on there but i am so confused because a week ago she said she loved me too, why said that if she wants to get rid of me?
Light Breeze Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 Based from your reply you probably know the answer to your question. Like I said earlier infatuation is fickle. In my opinion, she told you she loved you not because it was true but most likely to avoid hurting you. Tell yourself over and over again that you deserve better. That you deserve a woman who will genuinely love you and only you. That there is a light at the end of the tunnel. This is what I do and it is helping. The pain and confusion will be there I know that feeling because I am experiencing it now. However, I know It will be alright, just make an effort to strengthen your mind and take it one day at a time. Post or vent here it will make you feel better.
Author michaelsark Posted December 13, 2014 Author Posted December 13, 2014 thanks, it is very hard right now. i keep having dreams about her and im losing sleep.... I will always want to know where it screwed up, was it me? or was it just her? she never gave me closure so it's just very difficult to deal with
Light Breeze Posted December 13, 2014 Posted December 13, 2014 Were there any other fights, disagreements, or other issues she had with you that you forgot to mention? If there was none... Then it's not you but her. I don't know how extensive your readings on breakups are, but practically all people here say that closure will come from yourself. I agree. You just believe that there was nothing you could have done about it and heal. LOVE YOURSELF, my friend, YOU DESERVE BETTER. NO Contact! It really really helps.
Author michaelsark Posted December 13, 2014 Author Posted December 13, 2014 hey, and nope i never argued with her, i was always passive and she was never very communicative in the first place, i just don't understand she use to talk to me about some things like if something was going on at her house she would say i really need you right now, she really made me feel special like she needed me and i was the only guy she would love. But i guess i was fooled
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