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Is this guy wasting my time from Okcupid?


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Posted

I've been talking to this guy on okcupid for 1 week. We seemed to hit it off from "messaging." However, he didn't bother asking for my phone number, until I just voluntarily gave it to him. He texted me and said that, "I was just going to ask you for it." A week before, he asked me about salsa dancing-and that he wanted to learn it, so I said that I could teach him how to dance and that on Fridays there is salsa dancing at this club. He said he would be interested in going. What really irritates me is that he doesn't have the balls to call me and at least TALK on the phone-which I would much rather prefer-him being a man-would at least make that move. Also, he didn't really seem that "enthused" about the dancing, didn't bother asking me what time it started, etc, etc. What is wrong grown men not asking a girls number and not wanting to talk on the phone?

Posted

Honestly, you're better off finding someone in person instead. People online could be talking to literally dozens of others at the same time than you have to pretty much compete with everyone else. It's a huge hassle doing it. I just made a new account but am considering deleting it already after 4-5 days.

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Posted

There are passive people in life. They go about their merry way and let the world happen to them rather than vice versa. HE appears to be this way. He's not gonna call. He's not gonna ask you out. Best bet is to next him.

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Posted
I've been talking to this guy on okcupid for 1 week. We seemed to hit it off from "messaging." However, he didn't bother asking for my phone number, until I just voluntarily gave it to him. He texted me and said that, "I was just going to ask you for it." A week before, he asked me about salsa dancing-and that he wanted to learn it, so I said that I could teach him how to dance and that on Fridays there is salsa dancing at this club. He said he would be interested in going. What really irritates me is that he doesn't have the balls to call me and at least TALK on the phone-which I would much rather prefer-him being a man-would at least make that move. Also, he didn't really seem that "enthused" about the dancing, didn't bother asking me what time it started, etc, etc. What is wrong grown men not asking a girls number and not wanting to talk on the phone?

 

How old is he? Generational gap?

Posted
I've been talking to this guy on okcupid for 1 week. We seemed to hit it off from "messaging." However, he didn't bother asking for my phone number, until I just voluntarily gave it to him. He texted me and said that, "I was just going to ask you for it."

 

He's either not very interested, or just not interested in the way you want/need him to be. From what you've said I don't get that sense that he's wasting your time (in the sense of actively, deliberately etc), but perhaps you're wasting your own time on someone who isn't right for you if you want someone more assertive who will ask for your number sooner and then use it to call you.

 

Maybe say in your profile that you're looking for someone who is assertive (or whatever quality you think this guy isn't displaying that you'd like the next guy to demonstrate). Do it in a positive way, though.

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Posted
He's either not very interested, or just not interested in the way you want/need him to be. From what you've said I don't get that sense that he's wasting your time (in the sense of actively, deliberately etc), but perhaps you're wasting your own time on someone who isn't right for you if you want someone more assertive who will ask for your number sooner and then use it to call you.

 

Maybe say in your profile that you're looking for someone who is assertive (or whatever quality you think this guy isn't displaying that you'd like the next guy to demonstrate). Do it in a positive way, though.

 

Well, I put on my profile that I'm looking for a guy that is assertive and someone messaging 50 times and texting 100 times is a waste. And that isn't a phone used for TALKING?

Posted
I've been talking to this guy on okcupid for 1 week. We seemed to hit it off from "messaging." However, he didn't bother asking for my phone number, until I just voluntarily gave it to him. He texted me and said that, "I was just going to ask you for it." A week before, he asked me about salsa dancing-and that he wanted to learn it, so I said that I could teach him how to dance and that on Fridays there is salsa dancing at this club. He said he would be interested in going. What really irritates me is that he doesn't have the balls to call me and at least TALK on the phone-which I would much rather prefer-him being a man-would at least make that move. Also, he didn't really seem that "enthused" about the dancing, didn't bother asking me what time it started, etc, etc. What is wrong grown men not asking a girls number and not wanting to talk on the phone?

 

No you are just plain wasting your own time even talking to this guy. He isn't forcing you to talk to him or anything, it's your decision on whom you make an effort for not his. By the second message if they are not asking you out, just simply move on.

Posted

He's not that into you and he's probably more excited about someone else

Posted

Lisa change your approach to OLD. Instead of complaining about him, asking why he is acting the way he is, and taking it personally, look at it as, this guy doesn't meet your expectations, so you should quit it, and find someone else that does. Simply put, he is not the one for you.

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