treeolife Posted December 12, 2014 Posted December 12, 2014 So i go to an all girls school. I meet a guy at a party, we text, he wants to meet up. My parents say its dangerous and I shouldn't be talking to a boy- im too busy and don't need the distraction. my grades are great I think I can handle it! I want to hang out with him but my parents say no because they don't know him or his parents. Its so frustrating. Next year they cant control who I talk to or date. Why is this year so different? How can I convince them? Everytime I bring it up in a calm & mature manner they get mad and say, "leave us alone we're tired.":(
MercuryMorrison1 Posted December 12, 2014 Posted December 12, 2014 It's just one of those things. They are most likely just trying to protect you, but many parent's don't realize that by withholding their teen's from dating they are actually hurting them more than helping. From the sound of it, you're 17 going on 18 years old, really IMO your already at an age where you can and should be making your own choice's as far as dating goes, But technically your still bound to your parents until the 18th. 2
PogoStick Posted December 12, 2014 Posted December 12, 2014 If they're not willing to discuss it, how about you just date and sneak around with guys.
CarrieT Posted December 12, 2014 Posted December 12, 2014 I want to hang out with him but my parents say no because they don't know him or his parents. Invite him over so that he can meet your parents. He is an unknown factor and - yes - they will try to protect you as long as they can. Also, if you are still living at home next year, they may still have such rules. Many have to abide by the rules of the house, regardless of age. Different if you are moving out to go to University, of course. 3
d0nnivain Posted December 12, 2014 Posted December 12, 2014 Make a written list of your valid points & offer to have the young man come over. Be sure to promise he won't adversely affect your grades & take pains to make sure he doesn't. As one of your points, remind your parents that you are trying to build social skills that will keep you safe next year in college. If you have never dated until you are away at school that puts you in a more vulnerable position. 1
LookAtThisPOst Posted December 12, 2014 Posted December 12, 2014 Make a written list of your valid points & offer to have the young man come over. Be sure to promise he won't adversely affect your grades & take pains to make sure he doesn't. As one of your points, remind your parents that you are trying to build social skills that will keep you safe next year in college. If you have never dated until you are away at school that puts you in a more vulnerable position. I think this kind of ties into the whole "I'm still a virgin at this age" posts we've used to have here. Chances are, some of these older teens had strict parents and likely after graduating HS, they likely will still be living with their parents or in a dormitory (rent paid by the parents), until their early 20s
sillyanswer Posted December 12, 2014 Posted December 12, 2014 So i go to an all girls school. I meet a guy at a party, we text, he wants to meet up. My parents say its dangerous Dating a stranger has risks and is potentially dangerous. If you're still in high school then your parents are (rightly) trying to protect you from any dangers. It's hard for strangers on the internet to say whether your parents being too risk-averse, though, as we don't know you or them or him. I want to hang out with him but my parents say no because they don't know him or his parents. Ok. Those might be valid points, but they are also things that you might be able to change. Perhaps your parents could meet this guy or his parents. Take your parents shopping to the mall and have the guy meet you there (make sure everyone knows this is going to happen in advance), or given that it's nearly Christmas maybe go to a carol concert with your parents and the guy or... well... you may need to figure out an appropriate social setting to introduce everybody. 1
d0nnivain Posted December 22, 2014 Posted December 22, 2014 I disagree. A full scholarship to college next year would mean I am supporting myself, now wouldn't it? Who will buy your clothes? Who will pay for food & give you spending money? Unless in addition to your scholarship you have a job & are paying your own way with no financial support from mom & dad, you are not supporting yourself. Use the brains that won you the scholarship to logically discuss your desire to date with your parents. If you show some maturity, they are more likely to let you date. 1
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