Jump to content

Date fail - she never showed up

reliablewolf

By reliablewolf,
in Dating

 Share Followers 1

Recommended Posts

reliablewolf

reliablewolf

Posted
Posted

Hey guys, I got a learning experience today, I'll try and keep it brief:

 

I met a girl online, we had a nice discussion and she gave me her number. After a few texts I asked her out - which was this past Tuesday. We set it up for Thursday (today) at 3PM to meet at the mall for coffee. I texted her on Wednesday, just to keep the momentum going. This morning I woke up and we texted again, this time I made sure to send her a text saying "I look forward to meeting you!". She replied saying she looked forward to it as well.

 

Well, 3PM came and went and she never showed up at the coffee shop at the mall.

 

So I sent her a text saying "Well, I guess you couldn't make it. Enjoy life and take care". She responded saying she had no idea what time to come. So I forwarded her our conversation from two days ago and she was real apologetic, asked me what she could do to make up for it, etc. I asked if she wanted to still come by the mall anyway, and she said she was too far away to make it in time. So I deleted her number.

 

Next time, should I make sure to send a "alright, we're meeting up today at 3PM" text or was I just the victim of someone with cold feet?

Link to post
Share on other sites
Danda

Danda

Posted
Posted

Nope. If she didn't know what time to be there, she would have asked.

 

I honestly can't believe she bothered to reply and with such a stupid, lame excuse lol. She should be embarrassed for herself.

 

You didn't do anything wrong OP. She was just a tool.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
losangelena

losangelena

Posted
Posted

That seems weird. I would definitely follow up if I wasn't sure of the time I was supposed to meet someone. "I didn't know what time to be there" doesn't sound like a good excuse at all.

 

It's interesting though, because I've had guys like, day of our date, text to say, "hey, are we still on," which I thought was totally normal, but my roommate thought it was a sign of insecurity. Better to be sure though, I'd say.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
reliablewolf

reliablewolf

Posted
  • Author
Posted

What's interesting is she claimed not to know when or where we were meeting, but two days ago the conversation literally went like this:

 

Me: "I like you, want to meet up at *NAME OF MALL* and grab a coffee?"

Her: "Sure! How about Thursday or Friday?"

Me: "I'm busy Friday, how does Thursday at 3PM sound?"

Her: "Sounds good to me!"

 

Then two days later she never showed up. She says she never got my text about where to specifically meet, even though she responded to it when I first sent it to her.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Danda

Danda

Posted
Posted
What's interesting is she claimed not to know when or where we were meeting, but two days ago the conversation literally went like this:

 

Me: "I like you, want to meet up at *NAME OF MALL* and grab a coffee?"

Her: "Sure! How about Thursday or Friday?"

Me: "I'm busy Friday, how does Thursday at 3PM sound?"

Her: "Sounds good to me!"

 

Then two days later she never showed up. She says she never got my text about where to specifically meet, even though she responded to it when I first sent it to her.

 

Well it sucks but frankly it sounds like she deliberately played you along and probably knew that morning that she wasn't going to show. Seriously her excuse is to stupid that it's embarrassing. It either shows that she dumber than a box of rocks, or she was deliberately rubbing it in your face. Either way thank goodness she made it so obvious so you don't waste any time chasing her ass.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
reliablewolf

reliablewolf

Posted
  • Author
Posted
Well it sucks but frankly it sounds like she deliberately played you along and probably knew that morning that she wasn't going to show. Seriously her excuse is to stupid that it's embarrassing. It either shows that she dumber than a box of rocks, or she was deliberately rubbing it in your face. Either way thank goodness she made it so obvious so you don't waste any time chasing her ass.

 

At first, I thought she just legitimately forgot - then I realized our conversation was pretty simple to follow and she said "sounds good to me!" in response to my day/time. I can't imagine someone forgetting that in 48 hours.

 

I suppose I could have checked in that morning and been like "alright, are we still on for today?", but as a poster above me noted - I would have felt like I was being needy/insecure.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Andy_K

Andy_K

Posted
Posted
It's interesting though, because I've had guys like, day of our date, text to say, "hey, are we still on," which I thought was totally normal, but my roommate thought it was a sign of insecurity. Better to be sure though, I'd say.

 

Believe me, if a guy has done ANY meaningful amount of online dating, this quickly becomes normal.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
angel.eyes

angel.eyes

Posted
Posted

That would have been the smarter excuse to explain away her flaking. Instead, she claimed to forget.

 

Sorry this happened to you OP. At least you're clear on where she stands and can move on.

Link to post
Share on other sites
spiderowl

spiderowl

Posted
Posted
What's interesting is she claimed not to know when or where we were meeting, but two days ago the conversation literally went like this:

 

Me: "I like you, want to meet up at *NAME OF MALL* and grab a coffee?"

Her: "Sure! How about Thursday or Friday?"

Me: "I'm busy Friday, how does Thursday at 3PM sound?"

Her: "Sounds good to me!"

 

Then two days later she never showed up. She says she never got my text about where to specifically meet, even though she responded to it when I first sent it to her.

 

Is there more than one coffee shop in this mall? If so, were you specific about which one? If you were quite clear, then she is being feeble about it. It's rude not to turn up when you've agreed to meet someone.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Danda

Danda

Posted
Posted
Is there more than one coffee shop in this mall? If so, were you specific about which one? If you were quite clear, then she is being feeble about it. It's rude not to turn up when you've agreed to meet someone.

 

He even offered to wait for her to get there and she said she was far away from the mall and wouldn't get there in time. She never had any intention of showing up. She's the bad apple type that leads to men on here paranoid about women playing games. Hopefully OP has some good experiences next to get the effects of this bitch out of his system.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint

Frank2thepoint

Posted
Posted
Next time, should I make sure to send a "alright, we're meeting up today at 3PM" text or was I just the victim of someone with cold feet?

 

Don't take it too hard. You dodged a bullet. It's frustrating that she had such a poor excuse and didn't even bother showing up, but her actions clearly stated she is not worth the hassle. You did good by deleting her number immediately. That will help you move on much quicker and bounce back.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
MercuryMorrison1

MercuryMorrison1

Posted
Posted
Most large malls have more than one place to meet for coffee.

 

That's true...But the OP stated that he offered her a chance at redemption in which she said she was to far away to make the trip. And besides that, we have to assume that he most likely stated exactly which coffee shop they would meet at in previous texts.

 

I like playing devil's advocate, but I have to agree with the general consensus here. She likely either got cold feet and backed out, or simply just enjoyed the attention she was given from a distance.

Link to post
Share on other sites
most_distant_galaxy

most_distant_galaxy

Posted
Posted

Wow, this is a really awful thing to do to someone. I would be very, very, very angry. I'm a bit vindictive, so I would ask a random hot woman to take a selfie with me so I could text the disappeared lady "thanks for the opportunity you didn't give me". Nah, I wouldn't do it because I usually imagine revenges when I'm not under pressure. But I think it's a decent idea for the future, as some people can be very annoyed when someone hotter than them claims what could have been theirs.

Link to post
Share on other sites
smackie9

smackie9

Posted
Posted
Hey guys, I got a learning experience today, I'll try and keep it brief:

 

I met a girl online, we had a nice discussion and she gave me her number. After a few texts I asked her out - which was this past Tuesday. We set it up for Thursday (today) at 3PM to meet at the mall for coffee. I texted her on Wednesday, just to keep the momentum going. This morning I woke up and we texted again, this time I made sure to send her a text saying "I look forward to meeting you!". She replied saying she looked forward to it as well.

 

Well, 3PM came and went and she never showed up at the coffee shop at the mall.

 

So I sent her a text saying "Well, I guess you couldn't make it. Enjoy life and take care". She responded saying she had no idea what time to come. So I forwarded her our conversation from two days ago and she was real apologetic, asked me what she could do to make up for it, etc. I asked if she wanted to still come by the mall anyway, and she said she was too far away to make it in time. So I deleted her number.

 

Next time, should I make sure to send a "alright, we're meeting up today at 3PM" text or was I just the victim of someone with cold feet?

 

Awwww this sounds terrible. I know it's not the end of the world and worse things can happen but it's just plain rude. You don't have to do anything different. This was just one bad apple, it doesn't mean it's going to be like that with others.

 

You did the right thing by deleting her number. It didn't matter if you confirmed with her again....she would have come up with a different excuse. She just being inconsiderate, and you are better off without this one that's for sure. On the positive side, you dodged a bullet, who needs someone like that anyway.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Dallers

Dallers

Posted
Posted

Cannot say it enough with Online Dating you must see yourself as the prize and be 250% higher in terms of worth than they are, so that you do not face these situations.

 

Decipher every single conversation you have before arranging a meet and make sure you are 99.99999% sure that she will follow through. You can tell a flake A MILE away and just by timing and wording you can tell if she is into you. No chase, no date. Man up and move on of course but she was not even worth the text message to acknowledge the missed date which just gave her more attention which clearly she does not need. Accept that nobody cares or gives a sh*t about you and walk through life doing the same back and you will be far better off.

 

Next.

Link to post
Share on other sites
 Share
Followers 1
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...