edgar allan bro Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 On Sunday morning, my ex texted what I think was supposed to be an "accidental" on purpose text: "happy b-day! i got the tickets finally (insert kissy emoji)", so I guess this was "intended" for another lady, even though we've only been broken up for about 3 weeks. Yesterday was day 12 of NC, and I thought "You know what? I'm really not down to start counting again," and I've ignored it since. This is a big deal to me. I think I mentioned previously on here that I'm super polite, and it's hard for me not to respond to someone, regardless of who they are. I've always replied to my other exes' breadcrumbs. Proud of myself. Although friends are telling me now that he's going to keep trying to reach out to me out of frustration because he didn't get the reaction he wanted. Keep me strong, LS. 7
blackcat777 Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 Honestly, anyone who accidentally on purpose texts someone they dumped an attention-seeking message like that... is a big turd. (*I use the word sparingly, but I couldn't think of anything more appropriate here.) DO NOT RESPOND. Let this kill him inside. More importantly, do not respond, because your energy is worth so much more than someone who is willing to engage in this behavior. Pat yourself on the back. I'm sure you're still hurting right now, and it's incredibly cruel of him to do this, but I guarantee that eventually you will be able to look back, laugh because the selfish absurdity of the behavior will create cognitive dissonance, and say, "What a <insert your word of choice here>." Most importantly, you'll feel relieved that he's not your problem anymore. In the long run, it will provide some closure knowing that he is that petty, and that you can do better. (It will take time to get to feeling that way, so be patient with yourself.) Stay strong and good on you for ignoring that. 5
Chin Up Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 You go, girl! It's pretty obvious he's trying to get a rise out of you. Now he's all.. "omgomgomg. why didn't she take the bait and answer? did I just blow it? I shouldn't have sent that text...noooooo!" 2
candie13 Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 yeah, totally childish - attention seeker! Sooo proud of you, you are doing so well, keep up the good work and go on. It can only get better, my friend. With time, it will get much much better. careful, to me, week 3 and week 4 were horrible horrible horrible, so please watch out, it's not over yet. 2
Author edgar allan bro Posted December 7, 2014 Author Posted December 7, 2014 I guess his text kind of sobered me up. I made it very clear to him: "either reconciliation or radio silence". To me, that's pretty simple and straightforward. It's like a door that can be opened if he really wants to. To witness him scratching the windows instead just makes me realize that he doesn't want to be with me. If he did, he would have already picked the honest route. I have a feeling that if he does turn the knob eventually, I'm going to be in an entirely different building. 3
candie13 Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 it's a process, my friend. How can I put this... normally, you're not supposed to ask. You're not supposed to give ultimatums. He is supposed to want to come back to you. one lesson I've learnt is that ego does no good to anyone. It's bigger than your ego. It is supposed to be about love... as for breadcrumbs, that's just him killing himself to get a reaction by jerking your chain a bit more. always keep in mind the bigger picture. this is not about him choosing between reconciliation and losing you. It's about him understanding if he is man enough to work through his issues for you and then give the tow of you another chance. It's a difficult process for him and trust me, making this an ego trip will only make failure a certain thing. 3
Author edgar allan bro Posted December 7, 2014 Author Posted December 7, 2014 it's a process, my friend. How can I put this... normally, you're not supposed to ask. You're not supposed to give ultimatums. He is supposed to want to come back to you. one lesson I've learnt is that ego does no good to anyone. It's bigger than your ego. It is supposed to be about love... as for breadcrumbs, that's just him killing himself to get a reaction by jerking your chain a bit more. always keep in mind the bigger picture. this is not about him choosing between reconciliation and losing you. It's about him understanding if he is man enough to work through his issues for you and then give the tow of you another chance. It's a difficult process for him and trust me, making this an ego trip will only make failure a certain thing. Oh, you lost me at the end. Who's making this into an ego trip and what do you mean by failure?
Dontfindme Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 This thread made me happy! Keep it going! I'm sure you'll encounter many more accidental texts. How immature of him. Also, awesome username, OP! Love EAP. 2
Author edgar allan bro Posted December 7, 2014 Author Posted December 7, 2014 This thread made me happy! Keep it going! I'm sure you'll encounter many more accidental texts. How immature of him. Also, awesome username, OP! Love EAP. "The accidental text" doesn't seem like something you can fake more than once if the person didn't respond the first time around. Haha I was wondering when someone was going to call me out on it; thanks. 1
Dontfindme Posted December 8, 2014 Posted December 8, 2014 "The accidental text" doesn't seem like something you can fake more than once if the person didn't respond the first time around. Haha I was wondering when someone was going to call me out on it; thanks. You'd be surprised. Sometimes you may receive a blank "text" that was "pocket sent" or even a pocket facebook request (I speak from experience unfortunately). Harassed by attention-seeking cowards? Nevermore.
Author edgar allan bro Posted December 8, 2014 Author Posted December 8, 2014 You'd be surprised. Sometimes you may receive a blank "text" that was "pocket sent" or even a pocket facebook request (I speak from experience unfortunately). Harassed by attention-seeking cowards? Nevermore. I would be mortified after the first failed attempt. All this because they dumped you, and you're not chasing them like you were supposed to be.
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