E.A Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 My girlfriend and I have been dating a little over a month and I have none her several months before that. We are really close and we both care about each other a lot. I'm the kind of person that is protective and I went a bit overboard. I was having a bad day and my friend who is a good friend of her was making racist jokes and I was tired of it so I told him to stop and leave her alone. I have anger issues that I control but sometimes I can't. Well she has been really sad and she said that I almost scare her because I am protective and have anger issues. I decided to give her space today but she textedme and said that it wasn't right what I did and she doesn't know how we will work. I have protected her before from her ex and she didn't care. PLEASE help, this has been killing me for the last few days. I already said that we should give each other some space and she agreed. How long should I give her? We really care about each other and yiu could almost say we love each other. Please help
Frank2thepoint Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 If you have anger issues, you need to work on controlling it. You have to be a bit more patient and not lash out so easily. You can always focus that anger into some exercise, like running, boxing, doing some push-ups to release the tension. As for your girlfriend, leave her alone until she is ready to talk to you. Don't contact her at all. Just back off. This will give you some time to practice what I suggested. Also, I don't know why you need to protect your girlfriend from her ex, but if an ex keeps showing up and your girlfriend doesn't do anything from keeping him away, such as she entertains his messages/phone calls, responds to them, then she's being disrespectful of you. She may have not let go of her ex emotionally. 1
Arieswoman Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 E.A. The first relationship you need to work on is the one with yourself, so get those anger management issues sorted. And what sort of "friends tell" racist jokes? And why tell them to your GF? There's something not right here. Leave the girl alone for a while, you are behaving waaaaay too possessive and it's turnoff for women. Good luck.
Author E.A Posted December 7, 2014 Author Posted December 7, 2014 I already box and run and work out. We have decided to just be friends for a while and get back together in a few months. Don't say not to do this because we both really like each other and she recommended it.
d0nnivain Posted December 8, 2014 Posted December 8, 2014 Let me get this straight: somebody was insulting her by telling racist jokes. You told the guy to stop & she's mad a you? That's insane. There has to be more to the story. If there is not, drop her sooner rather than later. Since you mentioned your anger issues, how far did you go in getting this other guy to stop telling racist jokes? For example if you punched him, I can see why she no longer wants to talk to you. Also how did you "protect her from her EX?" Are you sure she wanted your intervention? If she didn't ask for your help she may have resented your interference. Since she didn't seem to mind the racist jokes, maybe she didn't mind whatever it was that her EX was doing that you felt compelled to stop.
Danda Posted December 8, 2014 Posted December 8, 2014 Agree with d0nnivain. I think more details are in order, so we can make sure you haven't been wrongly accused somehow and that we aren't unknowingly giving you bad input/advice without realizing it. If all you did was tell the guy to stop making racist jokes then you were in the right, and the other guy was in the wrong. Now if you told him to stop by putting his head through a wall, well then that would be a problem.
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