Jump to content

Should I submit to him?!


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

If a woman is to submit to her man. Shouldn't that man be worthy of her submission?!

 

Just thinking...Share your thoughts too...

Posted

In what way do you mean submit?

  • Like 1
Posted

Of course. Why submit to a man who's going to abuse his position of power.

 

Do you have some specifics you'd like to share?

  • Like 1
Posted

You shouldn't submit to anyone, really. Anyone who would ask that isn't a good person.

  • Like 2
Posted
In what way do you mean submit?

 

 

It doesn't matter what she means by submit . . . doing anything at all with or for a man should always be about what she wants and whether or not he is worthy of it.

 

This question does not contain enough context to begin a thread.

Posted

The Bible says a wife should submit to her husband. Are you married? If not, than no you shouldn't have to submit.

  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted
In what way do you mean submit?

 

I have a friend who is in a relationship with a guy who is a total ass. And all he does is pressure her to submit. I don't know what he thinks that means, but knowing his personality, I believe that submitting for him means CONTROL.

 

That's why I posed the question in my initial thread about a man being worthy.

 

In this case, I don't think he's even worthy of the time of a day, but that's just my opinion.

Posted

Healthy relationships are not about dominance and submission, but compromise and negotiation. Give and take, to find a balance that both people feel comfortable with.

 

In my experience, any man who demands 'submission' from a woman is a man-child only looking to exercise control over someone else to satisfy his own ego and insecurities. And it never ends. There's always soemthing else he demands and she ends up living on eggshells, fearing that she'll break some rule or cause some offense and be punished for it. He'll break down her self esteem along teh way until she will believe that she doesn't deserve any better.

 

Whether he's 'worthy' or not is a nonissue IMHO. Get your friend away from him if you can.

  • Like 2
Posted

Maybe in the bedroom.

That's about it.

  • Like 3
Posted

I have never been subject to any man,men have been subject to me :laugh:

  • Like 1
Posted

Maybe she does not follow the bible, so with the information she provided makes that argument irrelevant.

 

In any context of submission, unless it is in a sexual situation and under mutual agreement, then I see no problem.

 

But if you submit to someone, like your some piece of property to be de-valued, then you lost your dignity and identity.

Posted
The Bible says a wife should submit to her husband. Are you married? If not, than no you shouldn't have to submit.

 

Well if the bible says it, it must be true.:rolleyes:

Posted
I have a friend who is in a relationship with a guy who is a total ass. And all he does is pressure her to submit. I don't know what he thinks that means, but knowing his personality, I believe that submitting for him means CONTROL.

 

That's why I posed the question in my initial thread about a man being worthy.

 

In this case, I don't think he's even worthy of the time of a day, but that's just my opinion.

 

...Confusing....

 

Why have you titled your thread "Should I submit to him?!"....?

  • Like 1
Posted

I'm experienced in D/s relationships, as it is the type I prefer.

 

Base question, he should be worthy of submission... but if this is a friend, that decision is between him and her and not you.

  • Like 1
Posted
Maybe she does not follow the bible, so with the information she provided makes that argument irrelevant.

 

In any context of submission, unless it is in a sexual situation and under mutual agreement, then I see no problem.

 

But if you submit to someone, like your some piece of property to be de-valued, then you lost your dignity and identity.

 

Ironically, you've completely devalued the statement I made.

 

Quoting the Bible is only possibly off-base if the OP had explicitly stated she did not share Christian beliefs whatsoever. As it wasn't stated, my post was just a point of view that may offer some insight into the situation. While you don't agree with it, there's no need to call it "irrelevant".

 

Well if the bible says it, it must be true.:rolleyes:

 

You can find relationship wisdom wherever you choose. Insulting others' beliefs isn't necessarily the best sign that you've learned to accept and love others, despite differences (two traits highly valued in relationships). Best of luck.

  • Like 2
Posted
The Bible says a wife should submit to her husband. Are you married? If not, than no you shouldn't have to submit.

 

Taking the bible quotes aside, if you aren't married, you shouldn't be "submitting" to just any guy.

 

Again, I was listening to my podcaster today and this "guy" wrote in. He wrote like a list of 10 things women shouldn't do and number one was something like: 'Don't cook, clean, sex, or pay bills for some guy who hasn't earned it'....

 

And, what he said makes sense. If you are "submitting" and giving some guy "everything" when he hasn't earned it, he won't respect it and he probably will become a spoiled brat and expect more of "something for nothing".

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

Also, I don't agree with the term "submission"....

 

Women have a lot of power in relationships....but, we are more complex than men. If we could just "chill out" and not be so complex, things, IMO, would go a lot smoother. I think that's where the "submission" thing was meant to address. Women can be some feisty creatures.

 

BTW, some people see "submission" as not what's actually taking place. For example, in some cultures women walk behind their men. Well, it's not cuz she's not as important as him, it's cuz walking down the crowded streets people can bump into you and stuff - so, by the guy walking in front of her, it's like he's her fender on a car and pushing off people who could bump into her. I do that with my mom a lot. If we are getting into a crowded area, I will step in front of her and sorta "clear the way" so she can pass more freely.

Edited by Gloria25
  • Like 1
Posted
Taking the bible quotes aside, if you aren't married, you shouldn't be "submitting" to just any guy.

 

Again, I was listening to my podcaster today and this "guy" wrote in. He wrote like a list of 10 things women shouldn't do and number one was something like: 'Don't cook, clean, sex, or pay bills for some guy who hasn't earned it'....

 

And, what he said makes sense. If you are "submitting" and giving some guy "everything" when he hasn't earned it, he won't respect it and he probably will become a spoiled brat and expect more of "something for nothing".

 

Yes! I completely agree. Submitting to a boyfriend is not the same thing at all as a husband/wife relationship. I agree completely that a guy could easily take advantage of that kind of situation and not respect it at all. The whole relationship is thrown off if the guy doesn't have the level of commitment (marriage) needed to act as the head of the relationship.

 

Also, I don't agree with the term "submission"....

 

Women have a lot of power in relationships....but, we are more complex than men. If we could just "chill out" and not be so complex, things, IMO, would go a lot smoother. I think that's where the "submission" thing was meant to address. Women can be some feisty creatures.

 

Couldn't agree more. The term "submit" means different things to different people. Before I became a Christian, I thought of submission as a very weak thing, and that I had to be "strong" to prove my worth.

 

But when the Bible talks about submission, it means something much different. I actually think there is a lot of power when a wife is able to interact with her husband in the way the bible outlines. As you said, us women can easily get feisty, and somewhat controlling. If we don't let the man lead in certain situations, I think we then easily lose respect for him.

  • Like 1
Posted

All this talk of women being equal to men.... it's made me sleepy, I'm going to bed now ( alone :confused: )

×
×
  • Create New...