Got it Posted December 5, 2014 Posted December 5, 2014 I have to ask, what level of designer wear are we discussing? Coach or Oscar de la Renta? There are lots of ways to find a large number of designer wear discounted unless we are talking couture, couture would be harder. As for asking her out, life is about the chances you take. Play it safe and talk yourself out because of assumption based on fear or take the chance. Nothing ventured nothing gained.
BetrayedH Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 Watch this funny video and you'll see exactly why men are suspicious of hot women: http://youtu.be/hKWmFWRVLlU OMG. Thanks was straight up hysterical. I was dying at the unicorn zone and thought I would pee myself when he got to the tranny zone.
Phoe Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 I guess I'm just suspicious because I figure there's NO WAY a girl can be that attractive without there being problems. I have never understood how someone's looks means they have problems? How does someone's face, skin, hair, etc, mean that there's something wrong with them? 4
Weezy1973 Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 T It's not that I'm suspicious of natural good looks. It's more that she dresses impeccably and wears designer clothes with top name purses, etc. This, to me, is a warning sign. It hints of materialism and superficiality. Yet I still find myself attracted to her, contrary to my reasoning. Anyone else feel this way? Yes - I feel this way exactly. Women who appear high maintenance are usually high maintenance. If a woman spends a lot of time, effort and money on her looks it usually means she thinks superficial things (i.e. looks) are really important. I dated a woman that was into designer things for about four months - and although there obviously is a lot more to everybody than just what they wear - she indeed was superficial and materialistic in the end. Not that I don't think there might be exceptions - but exceptions are rare. If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, and smells like a duck, it's most likely a duck. 2
newmoon Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 Yes - I feel this way exactly. Women who appear high maintenance are usually high maintenance. If a woman spends a lot of time, effort and money on her looks it usually means she thinks superficial things (i.e. looks) are really important. I dated a woman that was into designer things for about four months - and although there obviously is a lot more to everybody than just what they wear - she indeed was superficial and materialistic in the end. Not that I don't think there might be exceptions - but exceptions are rare. If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, and smells like a duck, it's most likely a duck. there is a huge difference between putting effort into your look and putting effort into your look using expensive designer labels. and unless the guy is metrosexual how many guys could even know if we are carrying a real Chanel bag or a fake one? how many guys even know what a Chanel bag is.unless you touch her clothes you won't know if it's real or fake leather. and unless you're up-to-speed on women's clothing and designers (and that would be weird to start), then you can't judge by just appearance alone and are being just as shallow yourself by judging others this way. but, i assume any guy who thinks a woman is high-maintenance is likely short on cash and can't offer much anyway, so the problem stems from their own insecurity of being unable to provide what the woman (seemingly) wants. 1
Gloria25 Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 Look, I know certain people can be "intimidating"... And yes, we all have our own "league" of what we think we can nab...but, to be scared of people w/o even taking a minute to check them out just drives me up the wall. Yes, I've had to muster up courage to chat up certain guys. Cuz, at the end of the day, until you chat them up, you won't know. I've met some really attractive chicks and/or chicks who were like put together really well (nice nails, hair, clothing, never see them looking like a rag doll) - whom, I thought were stuck up. But, they were cool as crap. Actually, several Hispanic chicks I knew, petite, gorgeous and just lovely personalities (duh, that's why I hung out with them...they were not stuck up snobs), and guys would be asking me all the time to set them up with these chicks.... But, as hot and sweet as these girls were - they in no way had perfect relationships. They had jerks who cheated on them, wasted their time - just like you and me. Gosh, I was so mad I was gonna beat up this guy for one of them and she was like 'no, I got this' (she was gonna give him an ultimatum, I would rather kick his butt for her). So, again, you might be putting on a pedestal a chick who is just as down to earth - like your average Jane. 1
BetrayedH Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 This may just be anecdotal because I was betrayed and all but I'm at the point where just about all I look for in a woman is a sense of empathy. Watch carefully at how she treats other people (particularly servers and others for whom she doesn't need to give respect). I used to be attracted to beauty and (probably even mores0) intelligence but that's out the window now. If I sense that a woman is truly and inherently empathetic with others, I'll feel I can have a sense of trust. I also think that homely women can also be just as screwed up as hot ones. They may even have more of a need for external validation due to insecurity. Heck, the first new guy that gives them attention could pull them away from you. I certainly believe there are some "hot" AND empathetic ones out there. You won't find them by dismissing them immediately based on looks. 7
Gloria25 Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 This may just be anecdotal because I was betrayed and all but I'm at the point where just about all I look for in a woman is a sense of empathy. Watch carefully at how she treats other people (particularly servers and others for whom she doesn't need to give respect). I used to be attracted to beauty and (probably even mores0) intelligence but that's out the window now. If I sense that a woman is truly and inherently empathetic with others, I'll feel I can have a sense of trust. I also think that homely women can also be just as screwed up as hot ones. They may even have more of a need for external validation due to insecurity. Heck, the first new guy that gives them attention could pull them away from you. I certainly believe there are some "hot" AND empathetic ones out there. You won't find them by dismissing them immediately based on looks. Agreed ^^...I'm watching ID and this homely chick got guys to marry her and even obsess about her, so it's not all about looks. But yea, she was a mess. Maybe some guys thought that by getting with a homely chick they didn't have to worry about drama, but they were wrong. Attractive or not, dressed to the nines or not, yes, IMO, the only way you can know for sure how a person is takes place by spending time with them. Over time you see how they treat others, how far they are willing to go to buy all those expensive things (i.e. stripping, sugar daddies, meal tickets). But again, when I see guys dressed a certain way and/or driving certain cars - yeah, I sorta mark them off my list immediately. But, with age, I think my women's intuition/6th sense is usually right when I see certain things upfront. 1
Molly Hooper Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 I thought 10/10 was as beautiful as they come.
SycamoreCircle Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 Well, I am a woman so maybe I can offer perspective from her side of things. We like pretty things. But pretty things are different from one person to another. So to you and me, designer clothing may seen unnecessary. Each person decides what is worth spending a lot of money on. As far as being materialistic, for all you know she donates the designer clothes she is no longer wearing and volunteers in a soup kitchen. Going on a date with her isn't an engagement on your part. If you find her too superficial for your taste after the date, by all means, let it go. By the way, the fact you are judging her based on something as superficial as her clothes kind of show superficiality on your part, don'tcha think? What if a woman was in your class who resembled Gandhi? She had a shaved head, wore tattered bed linens, walked with a crooked stick and appeared not to have eaten any trans fats in the last 3 months. Would you try to be open minded to the idea that maybe she's all about status and keeping-up-with-the-Joneses? That's why I have to agree with your gut reaction to this woman. In all my life experience I have seen that the women who go in for that sort of thing are prey to an intolerable and unhealthy vanity. 1
Danda Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 You could be wrong, OP. Some of my friends over the years were extremely beautiful and some of them were wealthier, some of them both. And they were very kind, interesting women. As far as expensive clothing, it's just what they know. They grow up being given clothing of that type/brands by their caregivers, and often the social circles (determined by their caregivers and other things out of their control, like school) reflect that that style is 'normal'. It doesn't occur to them abruptly at some point that they should start shopping at different stores, or stop styling their hair every morning, or whatever. It's really no different from me being poorer and not wearing much makeup, yet that not meaning that I am a 'slob' or an underachiever (or something). It's just what I grew up like and what I know. It feels normal to me. But since I am average looking and grew up poor, I can also tell you that there are plenty of girls who look down to earth who are total stuck up snots - just not over the brand of your shirt, but other things. I am sure though that you are certainly wise enough to understand all of this. Do you think it is possible that you make up excuses not to ask out an attractive woman, in order to avoid the risk of rejection? Would it somehow sting more if an extremely attractive woman turned you down, than a less attractive one? I can kind of relate to that, if that were the case. I have always clammed up really bad and gotten very nervous around guys that I find "hot" and I do believe that if they rejected me in some way (whether I was pursuing them or not) it would somehow feel embarrassing/shameful and sting. It doesn't make sense, but it's still how I know I'd probably feel. But that doesn't mean that all "hot" guys are superficial a-holes. It's more about my own inner self than them. 2
FitChick Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 Some interesting judgments being made about a woman based on her handbag. Could be a fake bag, maybe she received it as a gift, maybe she bought it at a consignment shop or on eBay. I suspect the real problem is that you don't feel good enough for her so are looking for reasons to reject her first, just in case. Hey, here is a great reason: she's a transvestite! Feel better? 6
Author M30USA Posted December 6, 2014 Author Posted December 6, 2014 This may just be anecdotal because I was betrayed and all but I'm at the point where just about all I look for in a woman is a sense of empathy. Watch carefully at how she treats other people (particularly servers and others for whom she doesn't need to give respect). I used to be attracted to beauty and (probably even mores0) intelligence but that's out the window now. If I sense that a woman is truly and inherently empathetic with others, I'll feel I can have a sense of trust. I also think that homely women can also be just as screwed up as hot ones. They may even have more of a need for external validation due to insecurity. Heck, the first new guy that gives them attention could pull them away from you. I certainly believe there are some "hot" AND empathetic ones out there. You won't find them by dismissing them immediately based on looks. Spoken with wisdom.
Divasu Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 I saw her purse on floor, saw the brand name, and googled it...in class. When I see this, I start thinking: long trips getting dragged around clothing stores, spending weekends remodeling house to latest trend...it all ends up the same. I believe that applies to almost all women. 2
Author M30USA Posted December 6, 2014 Author Posted December 6, 2014 I believe that applies to almost all women. Pretty much. And what do guys do? Go out for a few hours on a boat to fish? I never seen guys' wives out there with them...unless of course it's a luxury cruise.
Under The Radar Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 If and when I get dragged on a shopping spree it's good as long as I have two things: 1. A properly fitted pair of Nike Air Maxes. 2. Within the store, there is a strategically placed "Man Chair" for my supple glutes to chill on. 1
Phoe Posted December 6, 2014 Posted December 6, 2014 Not all women want to shop and remodel their homes. That's silly. I hate shopping, am a minimalist, and buy as few things as possible, that includes the home. If it's not a necessity/something I will use and use OFTEN then I don't want it. Waste of money! I'd much rather go fishing, I grew up fishing. My ex and I went fishing and I loved it. Women don't fit into a box!! 3
Author M30USA Posted December 7, 2014 Author Posted December 7, 2014 (edited) Not all women want to shop and remodel their homes. That's silly. I hate shopping, am a minimalist, and buy as few things as possible, that includes the home. If it's not a necessity/something I will use and use OFTEN then I don't want it. Waste of money! I'd much rather go fishing, I grew up fishing. My ex and I went fishing and I loved it. Women don't fit into a box!! How about a run-down fishing boat with hard seats? You'd go on those? The only time I ever see ladies on boats at the lake is when it's a tour boat or some kind of ritzy bayliner as they sip margaritas. Edited December 7, 2014 by M30USA
xxoo Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 I believe that applies to almost all women. Nah, there are lot of us who avoid malls like the plague. 3
Phoe Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 How about a run-down fishing boat with hard seats? . Always do. Pack up my hiking bag and boat around the lake, troll a bit, pull up to some otherwise unaccesable shore fishing spots, hike around, fish, get back on the boat, fish some more. Good day. 2
mario_C Posted December 7, 2014 Posted December 7, 2014 How about a run-down fishing boat with hard seats? You'd go on those? The only time I ever see ladies on boats at the lake is when it's a tour boat or some kind of ritzy bayliner as they sip margaritas. My half-sister owns a sailboat with hard seats. She taught me to sail. No margaritas involved (lots of wine, tho). 1
Phoe Posted December 8, 2014 Posted December 8, 2014 Troll a bit? On Loveshack I hope! Trolling is a fishing style.
Divasu Posted December 8, 2014 Posted December 8, 2014 Pretty much. And what do guys do? Go out for a few hours on a boat to fish? I never seen guys' wives out there with them...unless of course it's a luxury cruise. Well, my statement was kind of in jest. Re: your paragraph above, oh, you'd be surprised. Men love football, I hate football and there were numerous times I'd attend games in freezing weather in the rain, my toes frozen. I was miserable.
FitChick Posted December 8, 2014 Posted December 8, 2014 Trolling is a fishing style. Troll vs trawl definitions.
Phoe Posted December 8, 2014 Posted December 8, 2014 Troll vs trawl definitions. Trawling is using a net. Trolling is trailing fishing lines behind a moving boat. What I do is trolling, not trawling. 2 totally different things 1
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