I'm clueless!

[Stray Bullet]

Hey people,

 

I just signed up for this site as I was going through internet as to how relationships go bad. Honestly, it seems childish to share my story here but this is like my last resort to try and clear things in my head. Kindly bear with me

 

1. I dated this girl for past two years. Things were pretty serious. We both were proud of each other and everybody knew about it.

 

2. Due to nature of my work, I was mostly overseas. The last one was about 5 months, so texts and phonecalls were the only means of communication. Also, phone calls were rare and one skype call in about three days used to be like the best thing ever!

 

3. We had occasional fights perhaps due to long distance, the last one being the ugliest ( the point where it ended). In any case, we both knew fights would happen and we have to trust each other to which we both agreed.

 

4. About 3 months ago, some stupid fight happened and I ended up telling her it's too stressful for me as I'm in another country. She said it's over and so we stopped talking. She cried and wanted to remain friends which I didn't agree to. Finally after a month she broke down and said she wants to be with me. I happily obliged!

 

5. I think due to the distance, we both had this insecurity of losing each other. So after a fight I used to be frustrated and used to say that let's end it. It was more out of fear of losing her than actually meaning it. This time she said that I can't tell her to end it, she loves me and needs stability in life. She was right.

 

6. But things used to be fine in a day or two and we both waited every day for me to come back to my country.

 

7. Finally the day arrived, I was waiting to come back and see her. But, one more misunderstanding and I ended up abusing her. She broke up on the day I was to come back.

 

8. I thought it's just another fight and things will be fine when I go and see her.

 

9. She stopped picking my calls and blocked me everywhere. I was shattered. But I tried to remain calm and tried to move on. After two days, she drunk called me and started crying. Said that she loves me, so I consoled her and told her everything is fine. We can sit and sort everything out.

 

10. Next day again the same status. I was blocked yet again. That ****ed up things for me.

 

11. So i flew to her city and gave her a visit. She hugged me and all but refused to talk to me. I asked for like 30 min because I needed to apologise to her and clear my head off the guilt. She didn't agree and said that there's no point as she doesn't feel anything for me anymore. She, however, took all the gifts i'd brought for her! Lol? ( nothing very expensive so she being a jerk is not the case I guess). I stayed three days in her city, wandering like a lost soul. She called me on the second day and told me she misses me. Again, when I was trying to get a hold of myself, she hit me with a lightning! this time, I didn't mention of any reconciling and we hung up.I left the next day, broken hearted.

 

12. Now we were in touch over texts and occasionally, she would tell me how much she loved me but I screwed it up. And, told me that she likes this guy. It's been about one week and she's started dating a guy. Also, she's been drinking and partying too much which was never her thing. In fact, it was one of the contrasts between us that I liked to clubbing and all and she was more of a quite person.

 

13. I know for a fact that she did not cheat on me and there are various factors that led me to believe it. So, to save onto whatever dignity i'm left with after apologizing and pleading to her to give it another chance, I've stopped trying.

 

So, this is my story folks. I've not been able to make sense of anything. Your comments are welcome, please don't be very mean i'm going through the worst phase of my life.

[PegNosePete]

Sucks dude, but seems like it's over. She finally had enough of the bad relationship. There's not much you can do to change her mind so best to move on. NC will help you get over it.