reezie1987 Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Here's my story. I met a guy on match.com. we texted and talked on the phone for 2 weeks before we met. We hit it off and started seeing each other more and more. We did move way too fast. I gave up the cookie on the 7th date. Ahhhhhh shouldn't have. After that he was spending weekends with me. We texted all day. He always said good morning and sent me a picture in the morning. Then one day he told me his ex called and said she just had a baby and it was his. I told him I didn't want to continue but he said it doesn't change the way he feels about me. So we continued seeing each other. Then he started watching his newborn on the weekends but he still came to see me after. The end of it was that he asked me to stay Saturday night with him and he'll spend Sunday night with me. I agreed and spent Saturday with him. On Sunday he texted me hours before and canceled. Didn't apologize nothing. He said "baby momma said she needs a break" so he had to watch the baby overnight. After that I told him I understand. He texted back "can you talk?" I replied I am going out and would call him if I got back early enough. I never heard from him again. I know he blew me off. Probably for the baby mama. But I feel like I need closure. I know I didn't mean anything to him enough for him to give me an explanation. The explanation probably would've made me sad too but I still can't think straight bc of this. I want to move on. But I just want to text and ask him for closure even if it will hurt me so I can move on
Mi7522 Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Personally I wouldn't do anything. Whatever he may tell you won't mean a thing and you'll probably not like his answer any way. It's up to him to contact you so just go about living your life. Sounds as though he just needs time to figure out his life. Did he know his ex was pregnant or was this a surprise announcement?
Zahara Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 He wanted to talk to you. You told him that you would call him back, did you ever call him back? Sounds like you blew him off. 1
whichwayisup Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 (edited) Less a month it seems you two were together? He has a baby with someone and you can do better than put effort into a guy who isn't really yours. He has one foot in the door at his ex's, that is, if she is actually an ex. You can't compete with the baby and family unit. It sucks and sorry you're hurting. Don't waste tons of time crying over him. Let go and find someone else. After that I told him I understand. He texted back "can you talk?" I replied I am going out and would call him if I got back early enough. I never heard from him again. I know he blew me off. Probably for the baby mama. Did you call him the next day? But I feel like I need closure. This wasn't a long serious in love relationship, seems things happened quickly so not sure what kind of closure you're looking for. Edited December 3, 2014 by whichwayisup
Author reezie1987 Posted December 3, 2014 Author Posted December 3, 2014 No I didn't call him after that and the next morning he didn't say good mmorning like he usually did so that was it. Nothing after that. Even though it was all in the span of 2 months he did meet my brothers and even invited me to a company dinner and we planned to spend thanksgiving together. But it all went away. I'm just bummed out. And yes he told me his ex was pregnant with some other guys baby. But turned out to be his.
Author reezie1987 Posted December 3, 2014 Author Posted December 3, 2014 Personally I wouldn't do anything. Whatever he may tell you won't mean a thing and you'll probably not like his answer any way. It's up to him to contact you so just go about living your life. Sounds as though he just needs time to figure out his life. Did he know his ex was pregnant or was this a surprise announcement? He knew she was pregnant but she thought it was someone else's. I shouldve known it was his but he wasn't honest it could've been his or I didn't get the clues
Lokin4AReason Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 let him go and continue on w/ your life .... you were too good for him ... from the sounds of it 1
Author reezie1987 Posted December 3, 2014 Author Posted December 3, 2014 Personally I wouldn't do anything. Whatever he may tell you won't mean a thing and you'll probably not like his answer any way. It's up to him to contact you so just go about living your life. Sounds as though he just needs time to figure out his life. Did he know his ex was pregnant or was this a surprise announcement? He wanted to talk to you. You told him that you would call him back, did you ever call him back? Sounds like you blew him off. No I didn't call him back that night. And he just left it at that no more texts. I blew him off because he blew me off first. Just the way he did it makes me so angry!!!
Ducktape Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 No I didn't call him back that night. And he just left it at that no more texts. I blew him off because he blew me off first. Just the way he did it makes me so angry!!! Sooo.... You're both alone, not talking, because of your egos? Is that it? Am I understanding the situation correctly? If yes, I don't understand people sometimes. They prefer to come on a forum to ask strangers what's up with their love life, instead of just talking to their boyfriend/girlfriend/date.
mammasita Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 You're not gonna get closure from him. Forget him and just move on. Are you even sure he was broken up with his "ex"? I'm willing to bet he was still with her. 1
whichwayisup Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 He knew she was pregnant but she thought it was someone else's. I shouldve known it was his but he wasn't honest it could've been his or I didn't get the clues Chances are he wasn't honest with you and possibly because his 'ex' was pregnant she may not have wanted to have sex near the end of her pregnancy. The timing seems right, 7-9 months pregnant during the 2 months you two were together. Anyway, try to let go and not get caught up in this. He has a baby with someone else and that is a #1 priority in his life now.
whichwayisup Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 No I didn't call him back that night. And he just left it at that no more texts. I blew him off because he blew me off first. Just the way he did it makes me so angry!!! He was busy, he blew you off because of the baby. You took it a certain way and never contacted him back, so he chose that opportunity to not contact you anymore. Either way it's for the best. You deserve someone who is gonna treat you better ,not lie to you, and not make you a high priority. 1
Zahara Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 No I didn't call him back that night. And he just left it at that no more texts. I blew him off because he blew me off first. Just the way he did it makes me so angry!!! He didn't blow you off. He spent time with you on that Saturday. Come Sunday, you said he informed you hours before to cancel. And YOU said you understood. And he wanted to call you. You blew him off. The thing is, you didn't "understand" as it pissed you off. If you were upset, speak up. So you passively responded that if you had time you would call him and you never did. It's now a stand-off. The thing is, whether he lied to you or not, his past, his ex and this child is going to come in the way of your relationship and it is probably drama you would be better off staying away from. 1
Author reezie1987 Posted December 3, 2014 Author Posted December 3, 2014 let him go and continue on w/ your life .... you were too good for him ... from the sounds of it Thank you =)
Author reezie1987 Posted December 3, 2014 Author Posted December 3, 2014 Sooo.... You're both alone, not talking, because of your egos? Is that it? Am I understanding the situation correctly? If yes, I don't understand people sometimes. They prefer to come on a forum to ask strangers what's up with their love life, instead of just talking to their boyfriend/girlfriend/date. No i haven't called because im.afraid of another rejection because he already rejected me by not contacting me anymore. I.do see that he's back on match though so he's moved on. This thread really is helping me out a lot. I'm almost ready to forget this ever happened. Thanks! ! 1
Lokin4AReason Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 so if he moved on, than you should too ... it ll be for the best, you ll see 1
Author reezie1987 Posted December 3, 2014 Author Posted December 3, 2014 You're not gonna get closure from him. Forget him and just move on. Are you even sure he was broken up with his "ex"? I'm willing to bet he was still with her. He told me he hasn't talked to her since February the last time they had sex. Then she called in october. He didn't answer. So she texted him pictures of the baby. And the baby was then about 3 weeks old. I don't know if he was with her or not as he was with me every weekend and we saw each other sometimes 4 days In a row even though we live 40 miles of each other. So I'm not sure but he wasn't truthful 100%.
Author reezie1987 Posted December 3, 2014 Author Posted December 3, 2014 so if he moved on, than you should too ... it ll be for the best, you ll see Thank you so much!! I feel a lot better now I was a little obsessed about this but I see more clearly now
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