Cheerbabe93 Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 (edited) About a week ago I met this guy at a Cafe and he came over and we started talking and he ended up giving me his number and told me to text him. Turns out he is a professional basketball player but I didn't know who he was because I simply don't watch sports. I gotta say that I immediately felt some sort of connection and I definitely thought that he was really attractive, he was amazing eyes and a really nice smile. However he is 16 years older than me. (I am 21 and he is 37 but it doesn't bother us) Anyways, we started texting all day and agreed to meet for coffee again two days later. Then another two days later we hung out again and he took me shopping and actually paid for everything that I picked out. I didn't really know what to think because I expected to pay for it myself. He has really good manners too for example he never lets me walk on the side of the street and always holds the doors open. He also has a nickname for me, not babe or baby but something more personal I guess. Not sure if that means anything though. And when we have our little coffee dates he always finds a way to somehow touch me whether it is a high five or a playful "slap" in the face (Not sure how to describe it but maybe you guys know what I mean?) After shopping we went back to his apartment and we ended up having sex. Yes, I know it sounds terrible. We met again the day after and then again 3 days later. When we are together things just feel right, he makes me laugh and he is really nice and we don't just have sex, we talk too and cuddle. On Monday a class of mine got canceled and I told him and he said I should come over so I did and we took a nap together. I know this probably doesn't have a future because he is so much older than me and because he is a professional basketball player but I am starting to really like this man. I am just not really sure what he thinks of me. He told me he likes me and that it is not just sex and fun for him but then again it is very easy to just say stuff like that. Opinions please? Edited December 2, 2014 by Cheerbabe93
mammasita Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Well, there's absolutely NO way to know at this point because you haven't taken any time to know what his true intentions are. Only time will tell.
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted December 2, 2014 Author Posted December 2, 2014 Whats his name? I'm sorry but I won't give out his name. His name is not important. He is pretty well known but not one of the NBA players. He plays in other leagues
cif Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Talking/cuddling in between sex is not dating. Going out, doing things and getting to know each other is dating. Don't let a man slap you even jokingly. Ass maybe, face no. It's demeaning. 4
lovemetobits Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Hmm. He likes you but it's difficult to tell if your relationship will get somewhere. Give it some time and you could eventually ask if what status you're really in.
CarrieT Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Stop having sex and see if he sticks around. Pretty easy to figure out his motivations when he isn't getting any... 6
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted December 2, 2014 Author Posted December 2, 2014 Stop having sex and see if he sticks around. Pretty easy to figure out his motivations when he isn't getting any... Hmm I don't think that would work. He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me.
mammasita Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Hmm I don't think that would work. He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. Well there you have it. You believe this crap????!!!!!!! He's making you believe that you should want to be in his presence. What an ass. 7
BlueIris Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Hmm I don't think that would work. He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. Of course it would work- he'd leave. If he said this, he is only using you for sex and does not like you. 3
InsaneTrombone Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Hmm I don't think that would work. He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. Well, did you really need to come on here and ask if all he wants is sex? He thinks your hot, maybe he likes you, but that line says you're just being used for sex. 1
TouchedByViolet Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 This guy is a player, on and off the court. You are short term fun. That is it. If you can accept that and enjoy it continue. 1
LostOnes05 Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Hmm I don't think that would work. He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. LMAO!!! So he buys you stuff and you sleep with him...there's a word for that...can't quite put my finger on it...it will come to me eventually...hmm. I really hope you are not serious about continuing this relationship. Any man that tells you basically "I can have what I want, when I want it" is an egotistical a-hole. He even told you he was and would continue sleeping with other women, and you didn't get out of there immediately?? I must say, he saw you as a young, impressionable, easy target. Want to know how he really feels, let him buy you something but get no sex in return, you won't even be yesterday's news! 3
Blakely Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Hmm I don't think that would work. He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. Nope, doesn't sound like he's using you up or only interested in sex.. *Long sighh* 1
doeblin Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Hmm I don't think that would work. He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. What the hell?! Please reread your comment, and imagine that this time a friend of yours said it about her new "date". Sounds like an entitled douche. 3
MrNate 2.0 Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Speaking as a man who knows exactly what's going on in his head: You pretty much have the self esteem of a log. He knows this and it is why he's sleeping with multiple women with no intentions of settling with you. You're wrapped around his fingers, thus not considered worth anything beyond a fwb. I'm not going to tell you what to do here. Just know that he's getting more out of this deal than you, and it's not going to change until you move on to someone else. Pick wisely. 1
Ruby Slippers Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 He sees you as a temporary plaything. He has 16 years of life experience on you and sounds like a great manipulator. This is a potentially hurtful and damaging situation for you if you continue. I'd lose his number today.
Leigh 87 Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Well there you have it. You believe this crap????!!!!!!! He's making you believe that you should want to be in his presence. What an ass. yuck 1
FitChick Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Make a list of the clothing and jewelry you want him to buy you. Then when you have it, dump him. He's probably never been dumped. 7
almond Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. ... I am starting to really like this man. I am just not really sure what he thinks of me. ... You pretty much have the self esteem of a log. Pretty much. This isn't going to end well for you. Work on yourself. If you're going to continue with this guy, see it for what it is and keep your feelings in check. If you don't, prepare for some heartache. 1
Blade96 Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me" What the $%&* ?? Madam, you have your answer as to what he is like just by this alone. My Internet Belarusian boyfriend (and our mutual friends) are kind of celebs too. But there is no way they would say that to anyone. On the contrary when I praise them, because they are sweet people, they say "No I'm ordinary." The person who says that sort of thing as in your post is a douche of one of highest degrees. He thinks he's hot $& on a silver platter, doesn't he. Instant turn off if a person - celeb or not, makes that kind of remark. 2
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted December 3, 2014 Author Posted December 3, 2014 Ok let me rephrase my question... How can I make him like me and develop feelings for me and not just see me as a bootycall? I really thought he liked me especially cause he took me home. He said I'm the 2nd girl that knows where he lives and the first one he let's inside. Kinda thought that meant something.
TigerLilly78 Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Hmm I don't think that would work. He told me that a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. Dam what a dick he bascikly bought you for the cost of a few trinkets and now is trying to convince you just how "lucky you are" that he did that can you not see whats wrong here? why are women so quick to sell themselves so short these days.. 1
TigerLilly78 Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Ok let me rephrase my question... How can I make him like me and develop feelings for me and not just see me as a bootycall? I really thought he liked me especially cause he took me home. He said I'm the 2nd girl that knows where he lives and the first one he let's inside. Kinda thought that meant something. You cant you sold yourself out and gave up sex way to soon he has zero respect for you anything past this is nothing but him continuing to play you for sex it means nothing and hes prob told many women before you that same line..
CarrieT Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 Ok let me rephrase my question... How can I make him like me and develop feelings for me and not just see me as a bootycall? You can't MAKE anyone like you. You can't MAKE any one develop feelings. I see where you are going with this: You want this guy to feel towards you the way a normal, loving, committed man would feel in a strong, monogamous relationship. But with this type of jargon he is feeding you: a lot of women would give anything to be in my position and he told me that he sleeps with one other woman but if I satisfy him more he will "fire" the other one and "hire" me. What you want is NEVER EVER going to happen because he views women as a tradable commodity. Please, don't you see that? What others have said: You are a plaything and nothing else. 3
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