Has he changed his mind?

[Kay1988]

Hi everyone, I'm looking for some advice. I have this friend who I've wanted to date for quite some time, but we're incredibly close friends, so it's a little bit of a weird topic.

 

Anyway, I told him a few months ago how I felt, and he told me he felt the same. We agreed that if we are to date, we'd take it slow and arrange a low pressure outing to test it out.

 

So that was all cool, but then a little while later, maybe a week or so, I just sent him a message, nothing too pushy (I don't think?) saying that I had an idea of where we could go for the date.

 

He just replied with 'Can we leave it for a bit? Sorry.'

 

Which sucked, but it was fine, I text him back saying no problem.

 

Anyway nothing happened for a while after that, and I certainly hadn't changed my feelings, so I pulled him up about it a few weeks ago, just saying that I'm not sure what's going on now, and I'd like to know where he is with the whole situation, and I told him if he's had a mind change then that's fine, just let me know.

 

Anyway, he had no response for me, and I've not really heard anything at all on the subject from his side. I can only assume he changed his mind.

The thing that bothers me is that he won't come out and tell me this. As mentioned, we're really good friends, and in awkward situations/arguments we typically talk it out. So it's strange for me to be sat here wondering if he still wants to go on a date, or if he changed his mind, or what the issue is at all really. We've never had communication problems before so I'm a little lost haha.

 

I'm wondering what other people would do? I want to bring it up, because frankly I'd rather have an 'It's not gonna happen', than just assume he's over the idea. But I dunno what the best thing to do is because at the same time I don't want to come across as pushy/needy or whatever.

[liove]

since you are such good friends why not going directly to his place to talk it out? if he ignores you or doesnt want to talk about it, it means he changed his mind or worse never felt that way in the first place but didnt want to hurt you

[liove]

i'm sorry but i dont agree. I dont know whats happening on this forum but everyone seems to be quitting in a glance and "move on."

Human nature cannot move on unless we understand perfectly the situation. We just cannot stop analysing so please, stop with these advices like "move on". it's like we say to someones that is angry "you are angry" ; it will make that person even more angry...

 

I dont think that he found someone else, and if he did, he didnt have the time to connect with that person as much as he conected with you so you still have an advantage.

 

i think you should either go to his place (if you are really very very close) because you deserve to know it (if he igores a good friend, it means he is a jerk and that is better you remain just friends).

 

if you dont feel like going to his place (which means you are not that close) you can try to call him. if he doest call you back, you should go on NO CONTACT ! he will reach you back, trust me!